And I need you to recover
TITLE: Gone
AUTHOR: Ashe promisethesun
FANDOM(S): Dragon Age 2
CHARACTER(S): Hawke/Fenris
PROMPT: #074 Alone
RECIPIENT: Myself!
RATING: PG
WARNINGS: Nup
SPOILERS?: Act 2: post-serial killer quest, deals with Mama!Hawke
WORD COUNT: 632
The estate is too quiet.
Hawke stares at her hands, turning them over in her lap as if she can find something in them, some answers. But they are just her hands, the same ones that gripped her sword and slashed that monster into small bits with a howl of rage. Her mouth goes dry as the scene replays in her mind, as she holds tightly to the body with her mother's head.
Her eyes shut, and she listens to the crackle of the fire in her room, to the pounding of her heart in her ears, to the creak of armor and light footsteps as they make their way to her room. With a sigh, Hawke opens her eyes again, her head turning slowly as she looks at Fenris.
A moment passes before he speaks. “I don't know what to say, but I am here.”
Her head moves again, so that she's only staring at him from the corner of her eye, her voice hollow. There's a deep pain in her chest, a heaviness she doesn't wish to feel anymore. She's tired of losing everyone important to her. “Am I to blame, for not saving her?” The words are harsh and raw, and she doesn't give a damn that her feelings are exposed, bleeding out onto the expensive carpet at her feet. Her shoulders sag in defeat.
The pain is making her think strange things now.
“I could say no, but would that help?” He walks closer to her now, and she goes back to staring at her hands. There are a million replies on the tip of her tongue, but none of them feel appropriate. “You are looking for forgiveness, but I am not the one who can give it to you.”
Her lips part as she bows her head, words dying on her lips. “She was my mother.” He already knows that, though, and so saying it is pointless, but what else is there?
Fenris stands above her, shifting awkwardly. He's not good at this. That's fine. It's okay. She doesn't expect him to suddenly know just what to say to or how to say it, but the fact that he's here, that he... She reaches out, her fingers wrapping around his wrist. “Don't leave,” she begs in a quiet voice.
Hawke realizes she's baring herself to him, again. And it's probable that he will run. Again. But she needs him. More than ever, she needs him. She needs to not be alone. “I just... It hurts. Even killing him didn't make any of it feel better. Killing him doesn't bring her back. Why...” She lifts her head, fingers tightening on his wrist as she stares into his face, his eyes. “Why didn't I realize what was happening? The flowers. I should have known, Fenris.”
He hesitates, but barely, his gloved fingers brushing along her cheek and tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “If you need me, I am here, Hawke.”
She tugs on his wrist until he sits down next to her. With slow precision, she peels off his gloves, letting them fall to the floor without grace. He stills, and she can sense the uncertainty, but it isn't like that. Not now.
“Hawke...”
“Fenris.” Her fingers dance lightly over the lyrium tattoos on his arms, fingers on his bicep now and pulling him closer. “Just hold me.”
His arms slide around her, hands hot as they rest against her back, and he pulls her closer to him until they're chest to chest. She buries her face into the crook of his neck, her own arms wrapping around his waist as she holds tight to the one thing she truly has left to lose.
AUTHOR: Ashe promisethesun
FANDOM(S): Dragon Age 2
CHARACTER(S): Hawke/Fenris
PROMPT: #074 Alone
RECIPIENT: Myself!
RATING: PG
WARNINGS: Nup
SPOILERS?: Act 2: post-serial killer quest, deals with Mama!Hawke
WORD COUNT: 632
The estate is too quiet.
Hawke stares at her hands, turning them over in her lap as if she can find something in them, some answers. But they are just her hands, the same ones that gripped her sword and slashed that monster into small bits with a howl of rage. Her mouth goes dry as the scene replays in her mind, as she holds tightly to the body with her mother's head.
Her eyes shut, and she listens to the crackle of the fire in her room, to the pounding of her heart in her ears, to the creak of armor and light footsteps as they make their way to her room. With a sigh, Hawke opens her eyes again, her head turning slowly as she looks at Fenris.
A moment passes before he speaks. “I don't know what to say, but I am here.”
Her head moves again, so that she's only staring at him from the corner of her eye, her voice hollow. There's a deep pain in her chest, a heaviness she doesn't wish to feel anymore. She's tired of losing everyone important to her. “Am I to blame, for not saving her?” The words are harsh and raw, and she doesn't give a damn that her feelings are exposed, bleeding out onto the expensive carpet at her feet. Her shoulders sag in defeat.
The pain is making her think strange things now.
“I could say no, but would that help?” He walks closer to her now, and she goes back to staring at her hands. There are a million replies on the tip of her tongue, but none of them feel appropriate. “You are looking for forgiveness, but I am not the one who can give it to you.”
Her lips part as she bows her head, words dying on her lips. “She was my mother.” He already knows that, though, and so saying it is pointless, but what else is there?
Fenris stands above her, shifting awkwardly. He's not good at this. That's fine. It's okay. She doesn't expect him to suddenly know just what to say to or how to say it, but the fact that he's here, that he... She reaches out, her fingers wrapping around his wrist. “Don't leave,” she begs in a quiet voice.
Hawke realizes she's baring herself to him, again. And it's probable that he will run. Again. But she needs him. More than ever, she needs him. She needs to not be alone. “I just... It hurts. Even killing him didn't make any of it feel better. Killing him doesn't bring her back. Why...” She lifts her head, fingers tightening on his wrist as she stares into his face, his eyes. “Why didn't I realize what was happening? The flowers. I should have known, Fenris.”
He hesitates, but barely, his gloved fingers brushing along her cheek and tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “If you need me, I am here, Hawke.”
She tugs on his wrist until he sits down next to her. With slow precision, she peels off his gloves, letting them fall to the floor without grace. He stills, and she can sense the uncertainty, but it isn't like that. Not now.
“Hawke...”
“Fenris.” Her fingers dance lightly over the lyrium tattoos on his arms, fingers on his bicep now and pulling him closer. “Just hold me.”
His arms slide around her, hands hot as they rest against her back, and he pulls her closer to him until they're chest to chest. She buries her face into the crook of his neck, her own arms wrapping around his waist as she holds tight to the one thing she truly has left to lose.