You Want to Go Where People Know People Are All the Same
There's been a fairly popular meme around here over the past couple of days which I imagine came about because of Proposition 8, a ballot initiative in California which would amend that state's constitution to ban same-sex marriage there. (On my friendslist alone, amysisson, daytonward, ineti, infinitydog, and kradical have already paid it forward.) The meme is meant for you to post "if you're in a heterosexual marriage, and you don't want it 'protected' by the bigots who think that gay marriage hurts it somehow."
I'm not married, but coincidentally, I already had to do some pruning on MySpace this week because of the same issue, so for those of you who don't follow me there, I'll offer up a verbatim copy of the MySpace Bulletin I wrote on Monday morning, which is definitely in the spirit of the meme:
Date: 27 Oct 2008 11:29
Subject: An Open Letter to the Haters
To Any Californian Voting Yes on Proposition 8,
and Anyone Who Supports Them:
We all have our political differences, and I respect that.
In the American presidential election, for example, I can respect that you might have legitimate policy reasons to support McCain/Palin as opposed to Obama/Biden.
I can't imagine what those policy reasons could possibly be, but I respect that you can imagine them.
What I can't respect is the idea that you're against equality, that you're against civil rights for all, that you would take away rights already granted, that you would restrict people from being with the people they loved and embracing all of the joys and responsibilities of forming a family as they see fit.
These are the people you would reject in favour of imposing your own definitions of "child," "couple," "parent," "loved one," and so much more:
If you would reject them, then I reject you.
Consider this your 24-hour notice. I've learned that you're planning to vote Yes on Hate, or that you support the notion, and I want you to know the reason for your removal before I take you off my list of friends here...
...because if you're that bigoted and fearful, I'm not interested in being friends with you.
Sincerely,
Edgar Governo.
Harsh? Inflammatory? Perhaps, but honestly, I stand by what I wrote. The main person I was directing it to had already posted many bulletins of her own, full of regurgitated right-wing talking points and insinuations about Barack Obama, before her vocal support of Prop 8 became the straw.
Unsurprisingly, she inferred her subject status, and a minor row ensued in the bulletin's comments where she trotted out the usual standards--the "I have a gay cousin with kids, but" argument, the "it takes something away from the church" argument, the "this country was based in Christianity" argument, and the "it's a slippery slope" argument--before saying that if I deleted her, it would "only scream [my] intolerance."
"Really?!" ask Seth and Amy. My intolerance, you say. Give me a break, 'cause I sure need one.
I spent the rest of Monday feeling really worked up over that whole exchange, and I'm starting to feel The Rage again just thinking about it.
All of those arguments are unfortunate echoes of the exact same arguments used in decades past to support slavery and segregation, to deny voting rights for women and minorities, and most particularly to argue against "miscegenation." Same-sex marriage doesn't lead to society's downfall any more than giving women the vote led to giving gerbils the vote, and encountering people who don't realise that is sad, frightening, and offensive at the same time.
As someone living in a country which has had same-sex marriage nationwide for several years, such arguments seem especially ridiculous. Remember when Canada descended into a pit of debauched anarchy? Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria? Well, I don't, either.
In the same set of MySpace comments, seweccentric suggested that my approach to and characterisation of the other side was "not what [she]'d call catching flies with honey," and I can understand where she's coming from, but this is a civil rights issue, full stop. If I encountered someone today in favour of slavery, segregation, or restricting suffrage, I wouldn't have much patience or understanding for that level of ignorance, either.
"Separate but equal" is not equal.
I'm not married, but coincidentally, I already had to do some pruning on MySpace this week because of the same issue, so for those of you who don't follow me there, I'll offer up a verbatim copy of the MySpace Bulletin I wrote on Monday morning, which is definitely in the spirit of the meme:
Date: 27 Oct 2008 11:29
Subject: An Open Letter to the Haters
To Any Californian Voting Yes on Proposition 8,
and Anyone Who Supports Them:
We all have our political differences, and I respect that.
In the American presidential election, for example, I can respect that you might have legitimate policy reasons to support McCain/Palin as opposed to Obama/Biden.
I can't imagine what those policy reasons could possibly be, but I respect that you can imagine them.
What I can't respect is the idea that you're against equality, that you're against civil rights for all, that you would take away rights already granted, that you would restrict people from being with the people they loved and embracing all of the joys and responsibilities of forming a family as they see fit.
These are the people you would reject in favour of imposing your own definitions of "child," "couple," "parent," "loved one," and so much more:
Click to viewIf you would reject them, then I reject you.
Consider this your 24-hour notice. I've learned that you're planning to vote Yes on Hate, or that you support the notion, and I want you to know the reason for your removal before I take you off my list of friends here...
...because if you're that bigoted and fearful, I'm not interested in being friends with you.
Sincerely,
Edgar Governo.
Harsh? Inflammatory? Perhaps, but honestly, I stand by what I wrote. The main person I was directing it to had already posted many bulletins of her own, full of regurgitated right-wing talking points and insinuations about Barack Obama, before her vocal support of Prop 8 became the straw.
Unsurprisingly, she inferred her subject status, and a minor row ensued in the bulletin's comments where she trotted out the usual standards--the "I have a gay cousin with kids, but" argument, the "it takes something away from the church" argument, the "this country was based in Christianity" argument, and the "it's a slippery slope" argument--before saying that if I deleted her, it would "only scream [my] intolerance."
"Really?!" ask Seth and Amy. My intolerance, you say. Give me a break, 'cause I sure need one.
I spent the rest of Monday feeling really worked up over that whole exchange, and I'm starting to feel The Rage again just thinking about it.
All of those arguments are unfortunate echoes of the exact same arguments used in decades past to support slavery and segregation, to deny voting rights for women and minorities, and most particularly to argue against "miscegenation." Same-sex marriage doesn't lead to society's downfall any more than giving women the vote led to giving gerbils the vote, and encountering people who don't realise that is sad, frightening, and offensive at the same time.
As someone living in a country which has had same-sex marriage nationwide for several years, such arguments seem especially ridiculous. Remember when Canada descended into a pit of debauched anarchy? Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria? Well, I don't, either.
In the same set of MySpace comments, seweccentric suggested that my approach to and characterisation of the other side was "not what [she]'d call catching flies with honey," and I can understand where she's coming from, but this is a civil rights issue, full stop. If I encountered someone today in favour of slavery, segregation, or restricting suffrage, I wouldn't have much patience or understanding for that level of ignorance, either.
"Separate but equal" is not equal.