My Crazy Summer Break
This could take a while. I really need to start doing this more often.
Ok, so summer break and shit:
We got done filming the Uranium Project as scheduled and I think it will be amazing once Perdie’s done editing. He’s trying to find someone to compose the score. I had a beastly fight scene with an unstereotypically (that’s totally a word, fuck you Microsoft) large Asian and did a back flip off the wall of the gym.
I installed speakers in my car, three-way Infinity Reference in the front and two-way Kappas in the rear. They sound amazing.
I sold a turbo to some guy in Puerto Rico, he took it apart, found a crack and wanted his money back. Paypal is still resolving this dispute but I don’t care to rant about it now.
Amber and I made an ill-conceived decision to stay broken up but still sleep together. There was very little sex during this time but this was cool for a while just because I like cuddling. I think I might be gay… Anyways, during this month or so, we encouraged each other to move on and get involved with other people. When I went home for the summer break I hooked up with a friend of mine named Sami. I made plans for her and a few of my other friends to join me at my place near Philly to hang out for a weekend.
I told Amber I’d be coming and said I was bringing a lady friend. She flipped out, used her RA key to non-forcefully break into my apartment and took back all her shit she had in my room and some other stuff she gave me. She said I was using her for sex the entire time I was dating her and compared me to a rapist saying that she’s used to the feeling having been raped a few years back. That didn’t make me too happy.
She also told me she didn’t want me to go on the Ocean City MD trip we had been planning with a bunch of our friends. I said it was fine since she was obviously very upset with me and needed time to realize she was being a bit irrational. I asked when I could get back my $100 down payment for the trip. She said I couldn’t, so off to Ocean City I went. More on that later.
Back to the good… I just finished my 9th semester with straight A’s which hasn’t happened in a while. My appeal to have my scholarship extended for the next three semesters was accepted and I’m a happy Dave. Other than dealing with Amber, the break was very fun and relaxing.
I went home and hung out with Sami, Cory and Cody mainly. Sometimes Jordan, Sarah, or Jon would be included as well. Cory, Cody, Jordan, his GF Jess, and I went to Hawk Falls a few times. I peed on a big tree on the side of this one main trail which Cory said everyone peed on. We named it “Petri” (“pee tree” get it?). C, C, J and I climbed down a small waterfall and the water was frikkin freezing. I jumped off a rock into a pool at the base. We saw one kid jump from the top of the waterfall which Cory claimed was about 60 feet high. I told Cory he has no sense of measuring distance with his eyes and assured him it was no more than 30 feet but still quite a distance to fall. Cory and I tackled the whirlpool of death or WOD - which we soon found was minimally life threatening - while Cody and Jordan were too puss to swim in the cold water. We decided that if we got sucked down the WOD and kept swimming down, we’d eventually surface in a hot tub filled with sexy ladies. This theory remains untested.
Jess was boring and caused Jordan to be sometimes. We hung out the whole first week of my break whenever we could. Jordan and Cory had work during the week so I was often bored. I hung out with my sister, her girlfriend Jonelle, and Sami one day. My sister just got a new car; a 2004 Santa Fe I think. Really nice. She had the old shit box towed. I remembered at the last minute while the guys were hooking it up that she had infinity speakers in the doors so I quickly found a Phillips and removed them.
JC Penny had a sale on clothes so I got two pairs of shorts for the OC trip. It was Jonelle’s birthday so I went to Pac Sun to get her a hat while Noelle tried to distract her. Noelle sucked at this so they soon came in while I was debating between two. I asked the guy there which on he’d get. He told me “This one is cheaper but the other one looks better.” I said “I know. I’m having the same dilemma.” She had no clue I was looking for her and not myself, so she walked up, pointed and said “That one,” then walked off. So I got her that one. The guy bagged it, I turned to her and said “Happy Birthday” handing her the bag. She loved it.
Cory bought a green neon tube light for his trunk and I hooked it up in the dark pouring rain. Cory and I avoided the rain as much as possible by folding down his seats and lying in the trunk with a flashlight. It was very uncomfortable and took far longer than it should have but looked really cool when we got done.
Cory, Cody, Sami, Sarah and Jon all took the ride to Philly with me that weekend to hang out for a bit. The last three of them only stayed one night which was ok since we all stayed up till like sunrise hanging out anyway. Cory and Cody stayed with me the rest of the weekend and hung out with me and my roommate Alex. It was great times. We played handball and tennis like everyday and ate only pancakes for breakfast and burgers for dinner. Alex’s sister Grace came up to visit him for a day and we played tennis (poorly) and went in the pool. Grace has an excellent body and is very cute, but I normally only mention that around Alex when I want to mess with him. More on Grace later.
We had an amazing time all weekend. It was cool to just relax all weekend at my apartment with my friends and not have to do anything. We headed back Sunday to meet Sami, Jon, Jordan and Jess at the 1st of July fireworks in Jim Thorpe. When we got there like 20 minutes before the fireworks were to start there was absolutely no parking and the streets were filled with dumb locals. Also, tons of people from other towns came to watch because there’s seriously nothing better to do around that area.
I decided I didn’t care enough about the event or seeing my other friends an hour sooner to stay so Cory, Cody and I went over to Broadway to see if Perdie’s café was open. It was Sunday so no. We saw some girl walking up the street and a guy following her at a creepy distance looking creepy so we decided to follow him and see if we couldn’t prevent a potential rape. It was a valiant quest with no glorious outcome. The two went into the same apartment building and we saw no violence. Too bad.
We walked down to the court house for no reason and found a random scooter. It was a green-handled Razor that some dumb kid had sprayed gold. The crappy gold paint was peeling, the one handlebar pad was ripped, and it was all alone leaning against the court house with no one around at 10:30 pm so we declared “Free scooter!” and took it. We started scooting (actual verb?) up to my car where I parked at the opera house because I always have another scooter in my trunk incase I ever break down or just for fun.
On the way we saw a girl that Cory knew named Chloe. I asked “Chloe the web-footed prostitute?” and she said “huh?” I think that’s either a joke from Austin Powers or my sister, but I don’t remember. She said she was 17 but she looked 14, sounded 11 and smoked. I ended up confusing her - not a difficult task - and she stumbled into admitting she was actually 12. I think Cory was really trying to have a meaningful conversation with her but I was bored so I kept taking control of it and fucking with her. She asked for my number and I said “You don’t need that.” I think Cory gave her his though.
There was like no traffic on Broadway because of the fireworks across town so Cody and I got my scooter and had a non-competitive race down Broadway from the opera house back to the court house. I won but he almost got hit by a car.
We soon met up with Sarah, Sami and Jon at Sarah’s and I saw Brent Burger there who I hadn’t for a long time. We had meatball sandwiches her mom made and Jon set off bottle rockets in the backyard. We all left, with Sami this time, and I drove Cody and Cory home before going back to my mom’s empty house where Sami and I stayed the night. We probably had sex but I don't remember. Sami’s pretty unresponsive when it came to the intimate times so I could never really tell if I was doing it good. Maybe it was just too close to the other extreme after being with Amber for so long who was a whole bunch of responsive, to put it lightly.
I think the next day we decided to go to Heisler’s near Tamaqua. I kept honestly forgetting the name of the place and called it a few different things like “Matamusco’s,” where ever the fuck I came up with that. The closest I came was “Hesslin’s” but eventually got it. I believe it was this day that Sami finally resolved to bury her deceased frog Melvin. He had been hanging out in a mint tin in the freezer all winter since the ground was too frozen and hard to bury him when he died.
We walked along the trails behind her house with a gardening spade, a pretty rock (for the tombstone) and a tin filled with dead frog, looking for a proper burial site. She picked a spot on a desolate trail and began digging the hole. We tried another spot before but it was too rooty (cuz that’s a word) and tough to dig. We placed the aluminum casket in the grave and I began with the kind words. I spoke of how friendly Melvin was and how everyone loved him. How he would always lend a hand or an ear if someone needed it. I mentioned his leadership and athletic skills as a wide receiver at Notre Dame, and how he was always the life of the party, never forgetting his guitar to liven up the scene with a heartfelt acoustic ballad. I then decided the speech was getting a little ridiculous and we bid Melvin a final farewell. I declared, soon after, that “Melvin’s Eulogy” would be an awesome album name and we walked back.
I drove us to Heisler’s, Sami bought me a malt shake and we went to the driving range across the street. Sami knew the old guy working so I got a bucket of balls for free. There was a deer like 300 yards from me in the field so I tried to hit it and failed of course. I actually came close once but most of my shots were popped straight up in the air somehow.
I would have liked to hang out with Sarah and Jon more but it always seemed like, although they weren’t busy, they just didn’t want to. I Drover Sami home and convinced her to spend a single night at her place, which she hates, so I wouldn’t have to drive her 40 minutes to work the next day at like 8 am, and I went home.
Tuesday I hung out at home doing nothing until I went to Noelle’s house in Wilkes Barre. We waited for Jonelle to get off of work and left for New York to visit family for the 4th of July. There’s normally a big American party at my Aunt Jeanie’s every 4th but my great aunt Irene had just passed away so they cancelled the party. It was just close relatives hanging out so it was still kinda cool. We left later that night and visited Dolores and Chrissy. We watched Bridezilla on Lifetime or Oxygen or some annoying lady channel for a few painful hours while random Mexicans set off obnoxious fireworks around the neighborhood.
We left for PA sometime around midnight I think and soon got lost in Brooklyn looking for a gas station. Apparently, people from Brooklyn don’t need that shit. We found an absorbanently (actual word?) overpriced station and got like 10 bucks worth to hold us till Jersey. Then we stopped at a 7-11 and I got some chocolate milk. We set out and, although I felt bad, I fell asleep in the car for the last half of the ride.
I slept at Noelle’s and hung out with Sami for a bit the next day. Sami and I got a crappy slushy drink at Annie’s Ice Cream and we went to the park for a while chillin on the swings. We visited Perdie for a bit but he couldn’t do anything because he was sick with tonsillitis. I told him his tonsils are an important member of his lymphatic system and he shouldn’t let the man take them. I drove Sami home, had some tea with her and left for Philly.
It was time to get ready for Ocean City. W00t!
I was told by Terry and Pham that they weren’t going unless I did, and that made me feel better since, even though they both had other friends who were going, my going was the deciding factor. Alex was also kinda pissed that Amber was being a bitch to me, but he’d never say anything because that’s just not what he does.
I torrented like 1500 songs which I burned onto 9 data discs for the ride down. Day before we left, Alex and I went to get some supplies. I went to the car wash to make Simone beautius for the beach, and stopped at 7-11 for lighter fluid and ice. That’s all I needed for some reason. Terry arrived right after we got home and we hung out, going to the diner later. I got a free milkshake from a pretty cool guy I’ve had as my waiter before so I left him a good tip as always.
I dropped off Alex and Terry who soon went to bed and I drove over to Isaac and Shereif’s little birthday bash. I hung out there for a while, smoked a hookah, and watched American Gladiators. It was a good time. One of Ashley’s friends started complaining about what we were watching and I told her she could leave. I started watching Apocalypto while almost everyone else left for the 7-11 about a mile away. I got a call about 20 minutes later from Isaac saying that a cop passed by a few times and he didn’t want to leave the 7-11 and try to walk home for fear that he’d get caught being drunk underage. So I drove there and picked up the only ones who cared for a ride; Isaac and Chris. Everyone else walked and got back like 20 minutes later. I left at 4 am after the movie was over to get some sleep, but ended staying up till sunrise to burn more CD’s.
We packed the refrigerated stuff up the next day, having packed everything else the day before, picked up Pham from the train station and headed out. We got to OC around 6:00 pm and brought our shit upstairs. Amber talked to me and said she had a week to stew and be pissed at me and that she wasn’t anymore. We agreed to try to get along. I believe I went to the beach as soon as I could and dove in the water. Having spent the first half of my life on Long Island, I love the ocean and since I had not felt the waves for quite some time, it was very refreshing and relaxing.
Each day we’d normally go to the beach and then figure out something else to do. I noticed Amber and TJ being pretty cuddly which, after Amber freaked about me hooking up with a girl a hundred miles away from her, I saw as hypocritical, so I avoided them. The drama was heightened by Amber having told Ryan that she didn’t want a relationship when he approached her. He noticed her and TJ and was just as uncomfortable. The whole thing was like a reality TV show. We started calling the week “Real World Ocean City.”
We kind of split into groups to make things more comfortable. Alex, Terry, Pham, Ryan, Grace, other Alex, and I stuck together for the most part and the remaining few hung out with Amber. We went to the boardwalk, played golf, lazer tag, went bowling and just had a generally good time. As long as I was out of the house, or at least away from Amber I was having fun.
While everyone took the bus Grace and I decided to scoot the 41 blocks down to the boardwalk. After about 20 blocks we were regretting it. We stopped at a gas station right near the boardwalk for a drink and I explained to Grace the horror of High Fructose Corn Syrup. The boardwalk was ok. Alex played DDR a lot. I tried to give a “test your punching strength” arcade game a Shoryuken but it didn’t work, so I just got a running start and knocked the fuck out of it my next try. Grace and I weaved in and out of people on the board walk on our scooters exploring. This gave me a great opportunity to get to know her better. I had known her for about a year through Alex but, other than random myspace comments and messages, we never talked much. I realized she was far more intelligent and mature than I had thought.
I bought Grace some dippin’ dots since she’s never had those and we sat on a bench. On a side note: I have bought and done for Grace quite a bit these past few weeks, and received little gratitude. Perhaps she’s just not used to being pampered but she’ll have to get used to it. If it becomes a problem I’ll say something because I like feeling appreciated when I do nice things.
This guy with a dinosaur puppet came by looking for money and started talking to us. He commented on our “skateboards” and was pretty annoying. I didn’t want to be mean so, after his skateboard comment, I found a stranger to talk to to divert his attention from us.
“Yeah my skateboard’s got handle bars. I cheat. I’m not as good as that kid.” -Dave pointing out stranger with an actual skateboard.
“Oh yeah?” -Annoying dinosaur puppet
“Yeah dude, I saw him do a tailslide along this bench then kickflip to a 5-0 on the next and 180 off. Show him man.” -Dave encouraging an attempt that would land the kid in the hospital.
“I would if I wouldn’t get in trouble.” -Real skater using the boardwalk patrol as his trump card.
“Wow that’s the most creative way I’ve ever heard someone say ‘I can’t’” -Dave.
The dinosaur wielder finally realized he was being ignored and started heckling some family with two young girls. Grace thought it was amusing and clever how I dispersed of him and our BW adventures continued. We watched some 5 year old kid with a plastic sword beating the hell out of the beach for a while. That was entertaining for much longer than it should have been.
Sometime later that week we ate at Dough Rollers on the BW and I had the most amazing fucking turkey grinder ever. I recommend that place. It’s a bit expensive but worth it. Some people bought souvenirs but I guess I’m not really into that. Alex got a small wind up crab toy while other Alex got a wind up capatilla. They soon found that the caterpillar would hump the crab with the proper placement. This amused them to no end.
We played putt-putt golf which kinda sucked because the holes didn’t get much more interesting or challenging as we progressed, but it was good to be out of the house. That way we can get out and be out and go back to doin what we supposed to be doin… I kept getting like one below par so I think my final score was like -17. I putt like Happy Gilmore and didn’t expect to do so well. I think I beat everyone.
The entire week Pham kept insisting that we get ribs, but we kept leaving to look for ribs too long after the places that served them closed. In short we never got ribs, but it took us on a few adventures.
Speaking of adventures (I think it was Ryan who came up with this one), let me explain those of the covers. Grace, Ryan, Terry and I were hanging out in the bedroom where Grace and her mom slept, watching TV. One of us decided that, for whatever reason, probably just due to limited space on the bed, Alex was not allowed to join. So we named ourselves the “Not Alex Club” and wouldn’t let him in. Quite often however someone would knock on the door claiming to be not Alex but turn out to, in fact, be Alex. What a crafty ninja! Whenever this would happen, Alex would be sent on a quest we dubbed “Cover Adventures,” wherein we would blind him with a blanket, beat the hell out of him for a while, and return him outside of the NAC. We decided Cover Adventures was like a video game and after a few intrusions we started changing the name of the game for different platforms, such as “Cover Quest” for Nintendo DS, or my suggestion “Butt Sex Adventures” for the Wii. Heh heh, “wee.”
On the way back from the BW one night, Pham, Grace and I were scooting or rip-sticking to meet up with the rest of the guys for go carts. We later found out we were looking on the wrong side of the road anyway, but regardless, we headed back to meet up. A few blocks from out apartment, some girl stopped us. I turned my scooter around and went up to her. The rest went like this:
“Yes?” -Dave
“You have a lighter?” -Girl
“Sure.” -Dave, taking out the torch Pham gave me a few days back, figuring she wanted to light a cancer.
Instead she held out a pair of tongs gripping a piece of coal.
“Woah, you smoking hookah?” -Dave, now very intrigued.
“Yeah.” -Girl
“What flavor.” -Dave
I asked if we could join and we walked to the beach with our new friend whose name escapes me (some friend right?). We laid on the beach and smoked mint hookah - an invigorating flavor that I’d never before smoked without first mixing it with something else - with her friends Phil and Christine. We talked for a while about a bunch of stuff and I eventually rested my head in Grace’s lap and talked more to her, as Pham was in better control of the conversation with the others. I kept getting calls and texts from Ryan, Alex and Terry about what we were doing and wondering where we were so eventually Pham got our new friends’ numbers and we left.
When we got back, we found that Amber, Courtney, Jess, and TJ had gone to the under 21 club H2O. Grace said the place sucked anyways so she stayed with us. We went out to find a place open late for ribs and once again were disappointed.
Some other day we went bowling. Other Alex and I drove everyone there, and we got two lanes for the eight of us. In an attempt to keep Ryan from Grace, both for me and for Grace, Pham put her and Alex on my team, and Ryan on his. In an attempt to keep Jess from him, Pham put her on our team as well and took Terry and other Alex. Their team won the first game, but ours rocked the second. I use “rocked” lightly since none of us scored upwards of 140. Pham claimed to be distracted by the old lady in the lane next to him who would dance and sing whenever she did well, but I thought she was hilarious.
Grace and I kept getting strikes and spares, Alex did decent as well, while Jess kinda sucked. Someone suggested a third tie-breaker game, but I said I’d rather enjoy the friendship and equality of stopping at 1-1. My actual concern was mostly how expensive it was to bowl. Again we looked for ribs, but the place we went to closed at like 10. That’s WAY too early for the OC main strip, but whatever.
During the vacation, both Ryan and I were often upset by Amber’s actions. I, obviously having just gotten out of a relationship with her, and Ryan, having asked her out and received a reply indicating her disinterest in the opposite sex for the time. So, when she would cuddle with TJ, who was a fucking asshole in the first place, we were both affected. So we’d embrace the outdoors to get us as far from them as we could be. We also started showing interest in Grace. Grace was generally unresponsive to any of our attempts, but I realized that the way I act around girls I like is not much different from the way I’d act around my friends and I’ve worked hard to hold true to that. Perhaps this is a bad approach, but I think flirting is corny. If a girl wants to flirt, I’ll flirt right back, but if I’m truly interested in her, she won’t know it unless she flirts first. Ryan, however, came on much stronger and although he was my same age, about 4 years her senior, she’d known me for like a year before the trip so was more creeped out by him hitting on her than she would have been if I had. I later found out she didn’t even know I had any interest in her which explained her not flirting with me; like I said, perhaps a bad approach.
I did convince her one night to come lie with me and Terry on the fold out couch. Terry relocated claiming it was too cramped so Grace and I were left to cuddle alone. W00t. Ryan went to bed on the other part of the wrap around sofa. Ryan and I talked about Amber for a while but I don’t remember the details. I thought about talking about Grace to him but she was right there. Fortunately (I’ll explain this) she soon got up and went outside saying she couldn’t sleep. Ryan and I talked about Grace and he decided she liked me more and said he’d back off. I appreciated this since earlier in the week I told him I’d back off because I didn’t think she liked me. He encouraged me to go talk to her, so, despite being close to sunrise I went outside and sat with her.
We talked for a while and I told her I liked her. She said she left because I was giving her the only affection she’d received since her last boyfriend, also named Dave - so I guess if she ever gets my name wrong in bed I’ll never know- and it made her uncomfortable. We both decided it would be a bad time for either of us to get in a relationship. We talked about other random shit until the sun had risen and decided to go to bed. Just because I was lonely, I asked if she wanted cuddles again and for some reason she agreed. Soon, against what we had both just agreed on, she kissed me and we made out for a while. Good times. I didn’t want to try to take it further than kissing because of a ton of factors weighing on me including she’s Alex’s sister, she’s young, she’s innocent, she’s Alex’s sister, I didn’t want to use her as a rebound, there were other people sleeping in the living room, and she’s Alex’s sister. I can’t speak for Ryan but my week got better from there as I was no longer concerned with Amber.
We went go carting and lazer tagging one day, both of which kind of sucked. The go carts were kind of cool but the ride was not nearly as long as I would have liked; just 3 laps. We started out and I tried to take Jess on the inside but she cut toward the inside while I was right there so she spun. She somehow stayed ahead of me and two other cars, I think Ryan and Pham, and despite going slower, prevented any of us from passing; Lap 1. I found an opening on a small straight and passed her halfway through the next lap. I spent another half lap alone seeing if I could catch up to anyone with no luck; Lap 2. Finally I got tired of being all alone since I guess no one else was able to pass Jess’s slow ass and I started fucking around waiting for someone to catch up. Alex finally did but I only got to fuck with him for less than half a lap before we had to stop; Lap 3. So that was a waste of 8 bucks.
I ranted about how much that sucked as we started walking a few blocks toward lazer tag. Someone pointed out the sunset over the bay on the west so, without a word, I ran down the street for a closer look and some camera phone pics. I took about four pics, white balanced my phone on my yellow shirt and took a few more. They came out ok but were mostly oversaturated and didn’t do the beauty of the whole scene any justice. This is the best one I took.
After about six photos or so, I ran to catch up to the rest of the group. At my rate, even after detouring for a good 2 minutes, I caught up to them right as they were entering the arcade attached to lazer tag.
Lazer tag was $7/game or 3 games for $18 so Pham convinced everyone we should get the latter deal. We waited forever before finally being allowed in the arena to begin. It sucked hard. We had a room separated down the middle by large water barrels and which the Irish accented lazer tag guy said we were forbidden to cross. It blew, it sucked, it lasted for ten long minutes and it blew again. Most often I’d get tired of how repetitive shooting people over a barrier was and just walk around firing randomly toward the other side until I got shot enough to have to return to base and recharge.
Everyone but Grace and I thought it was awesome though and decided to use their other 2 tickets each. This meant Grace and I were left alone with Jess. The wait for our friends to finish just two games was close to an hour, during which time, Jess never stopped talking about herself. Grace, having the kind heart she does, participated in the conversation while I ignored Jess and waited for our friends return. During the few times Jess actually shut up to listen to her iPod, I would start talking to Grace only to have Jess disregard and talk right over me as soon as she had more to say about herself. No one liked her.
Pham got pissed at Ryan for whatever and took off without us. We got home and I talked to Ryan about it for a while before Pham texted me. I asked if he had gone for ribs, and he said no bust asked if I wanted to. I took special care to exclude Jess, and Terry, Alex, other Alex and I went to meet Pham at the bus stop. We decided Grace should stay behind to give Ryan some company. By that time she was cool with Ryan, and the deal was sealed between Grace and me so I didn’t care. I found that if you date someone who gives you no reason to mistrust them, you really don’t need to worry about jealousy, so I rarely get jealous anymore. This is good since Grace doesn’t get jealous at all, which is additionally good since, I’ll flirt with everyone, just to have fun.
I talked to Pham on the bus ride up but it was just pissing him off to discuss it. I told him he was just letting the stress of the entire week get to him and finally blew up at something. He said forgiving Ryan had crossed his mind so I let it go, truly believing in the healing power of time.
We took the bus as far North as it would go, walked another two blocks and found a place called Nicki’s, that the lady at laser tag had told us about. We got there at 12:10, went to the bar and found that they stopped serving ribs at 12:00. We left, Pham launched a large collection of mucus onto their window and we walked to the bus stop. I think I ended up just making burgers that night for everyone.
Everyone went to the BW early the next day while Grace and I lazed for a while watching Billy and Mandy which we ignored for the most part to make out. We soon realized we were not completely oblivious to our surroundings when a Diet Mountain Dew Commercial declared “You’re in violation of your face!” and we both lost it. So, since for some reason I’d never thought of that particular “face” comment, this became our default insult for the rest of the trip.
Grace and I finally got up, grabbed scooters and headed for the BW. We didn’t feel like buying more bus tickets, which were good for the whole day, so I decided we’d quickly show the driver a pass from the past and hope for the best. Besides, if it didn’t work I could just drive. The bus driver didn’t check more closely than a glance and we were on our way. We met up with and hung out with everyone at the BW for a while. While scooting with Grace I saw some girl posing in the sand while her friend prepared to take a camera phone picture. I stopped, walked over, stood right next to her and whipped out my phone to take a picture as well. I took a shot, said “Thanks” and walked away. The girls were cool with it and Grace thought it was fucking hilarious. We gathered Terry, Pham and Alex and started heading back. Pham left his wallet in some store where he picked up a Frisbee so we had to wait at the bus stop for him to run to the BW and come back. He came back and it went like this:
“You find it, man?” -Dave, hopeful.
“No.” -Pham, indifferent.
“Shit, dude that sucks.” -Dave, really disappointed.
“Yeah, whatever.” -Pham, passively.
“How much was in it?” -Dave, genuinely concerned and sympathetic.
“I don’t know. Let me check.” -Pham, taking out his wallet and looking inside.
“You’re an asshole.” -Dave, now thinking Pham is an asshole.
As discussed last class, Lazer Storm “The ultimate lazer tag experience” blew, sucked then blew some more, so I decided to try and scalp the four tickets Grace and I had. I asked everyone I could but no one was biting. I tried scalping the tickets to everyone on the bus ride back, after using the same old bus passes unquestioned. I asked one guy if he had just 20 bucks for all four, a good deal considering each ticket was 7. He replied, “No, I drink.”
I tried with a few random groups walking along the sidewalk throughout the day, with no luck again. I tried some motorcycle guys with pink Mohawks glued to their helmets (cheaters), but again was declined. I tried some really beefy guy I saw earlier get the high score at the BW on what I called the “Bash Shit with a Hammer” game. He said he just put his friend to rest. I didn’t see what this had to do with lazer tag, but I apologized for his loss and left. I pocketed them and we went back to the apartment.
We decided to go to the karaoke bar we saw a few blocks down. Not knowing exactly how far it was, we waited for the bus. Mistakenly, I was the first to board with my bogus ticket and a driver finally called me on it. I played dumb and decided we should walk. In the time it took to wait for the fucking bus we could have walked there twice. Unfortunately, the karaoke bar was, above all, a bar and did not allow entrance to any of the youngins. So, we walked back and decided to go to Rita’s across the street from our apartment. I got an overpriced undersized shake thing and decided to make one last scalping attempt, this time with a Rita’s employee who kept looking at me and smiling. Enjoy:
“How’s it going?” -Dave, the ever smoothe
“Good.” - Vita, the cute, blonde and, now I knew, Russian employee.
“So, you feel like playing lazer tag?” -Dave
“What?” -Vita
“Lazer tag. You know: PEW! PEW!” -Dave, making lazer gun hand motions.
“We don’t have those here.” -Vita, so naïve, or just so confused.
“No, not here. You do it at a lazer tag arena. And guess who’s got tickets.” -Dave looking around to assure this remained a secret for some reason, then leaning in close.
“I do.” -Dave
By this time another cute Russian employee had joined Vita and both were leaning in close, hanging on every word, and what was most entertaining, ignoring the actual customers.
“We don’t get off until 12 tonight.” -Vita, now speaking for her and her friend.
“How about tomorrow?” -Dave, the ever persistent.
“We work then too.” -The other one.
“Damn.” -Dave, finally giving up.
I left my two cute blondes to tend to the customers before realizing I probably should have invited them to the apartment after they got done at work. I’m 80% sure they would have come. Oh ho ho ho… *devilish laugh.*
On a side note, I determined that Grace’s mom loves me more than she loves Grace. Three examples, go!
1. Grace’s mom was making plantains. Grace realized after a few batches that her mom had not yet eaten any since they were all quickly snatched by everyone else. She grabbed two for her mom and handed her one.
“Here, mom.” -Grace, handing plantain to her mom.
“Oh, thank you, sweet heart.” -Grace’s mom, then beginning to eat it.
“Here, mom.” -Grace, handing her the second plantain.
“I already have one, Grace.” -Grace’s mom, refusing the offer.
I then motioned to Grace to hand me the plantain which she did.
“Here, mom.” -Dave, handing plantain to Grace’s mom.
“Oh, thank you, sweet heart.” -Grace’s mom, accepting my offer of the same plantain no more than 10 seconds after refusing the offer from Grace.
2. Alex, Grace and I packed up their mom’s car Wednesday since she had to leave before us. Before she left she walked over to Grace and me, standing side by side, and went to give me a hug before Grace. I guess she realized this was wrong because she stopped herself and hugged Grace first but the damage was done and I made fun of Grace again for how much more loved I am.
3. Grace’s mom started making a sandwich for Alex. Soon she asked Alex if I, sitting right next to Grace on the couch, wanted one as well. She did not think to ask Grace and once again I flaunted this.
So the week ended, and although Pham never got any ribs, we never went karaokeing, and there was constant segregation and conflict amongst the occupants of the apartment, I think we all had an amazing time.
Grace stayed longer than she planned because Alex and I wanted her to and said we’d pay extra for her if we needed to. So, having packed up the car the night before, Grace, Alex, and I set off for Wilmington Dela-where to drop off Grace. Alex called shotgun but said he wanted to sleep so I said he wasn’t allowed shotgun. He quickly fell asleep in the back seat giving me both a conscious navigator - important since I had no clue where I was going - and time to chill with Grace again. We listened to a few different types of music on the way back like Wesley Willis, Moldy Peaches, and some random dance hits from the 90’s.
We stopped at La Tolteca where Grace got something covered in guacamole, I got two quesa-dillers, and Alex got water and tried to go back to sleep in the booth. Grace was cold so I went to my car and got a short sleeve button down from my car. I love when my female wears my things.
We got to Alex and Grace’s domicile a short while later, the beautiful “Mini Little Mexico” where everyone had a car at least 10 years old with huge rims. We unloaded the junk in Simone’s overstuffed trunk and I found out that Alex wanted to stay the night a hang out with some friends and that Grace was going to bring him back up to Philly the next day, Sunday, for our first week of summer classes. I exclaimed that this was crazy talk and would be a wasted trip. I offered that if I could just spend the night, I’d gladly take him back with me the next day.
So we decided to hang out around their hometown. We went over to a Hibachi restaurant, where their friend Kay worked, to mess with her. Alex and Grace convinced me to try sushi. The first and last time I tried it before, I gagged and almost vomited. I learned that Shrimp Tempur is actually very good and that Wasabi is not candy. Kay got out of work early and we went with her to her house, saw some new born kittens, watched the PG version of 300, and drove to Main Street.
We parked behind a comic store and went in the back where a bunch of guys were playing Magic and discussing D&D. Kay summed it up well by taking a deep whiff and declaring, “Smells like virgins.” Some particularly large virgin… sorry… mother fucking nerd got angry with us for blocking the door and yelled at us to move.
We left and he stormed off into the parking lot probably back toward his mom’s basement. Another guy explained that he’s been going through rough times lately and not to take him seriously. I offered the services of a prostitute named Lola to help take his mind off of things and the guy laughed it off. I then started singing “Lola” by the Kinks and explained to Alex that she hated when I’d do that while we were having sex. He told me I was providing too much detail for a joke and that I was making him uncomfortable.
We stopped briefly in the actual shopping portion of the building as they were closing then left for a diner and gotted us some milky shakes. Afterward we walked back the way we came. We realized there were many numbered chalk drawings at different locations on the sidewalk as if there had been an expo or competition. We didn’t pay much attention to this fact until we found an empty numbered square next to a drawing of a fish. I insisted that we fill it in. Kay pointed out the dollar store up the street so off we went.
We only found the chalk because some little girl pointed it out. I wanted to get a chalk compass to draw perfect circles but it didn’t stay tight when the screw was tightened. We also got bubbles cuz they’re fun. We went back to “our” square and started. I wanted Grace or Kay, both with artistic ability far superior to my own, to draw a cat being blow dried because that amused me to no end. Kay drew a dragon instead and Grace drew something else I should have paid more attention to. It was like a big smiley face or something which she added a body and skateboard to later. I might have better remembered what Grace drew if I didn’t have to, having received no cooperation from the girls, draw the damn blow dried cat myself.
Kay ended up covering up the cat with her fucking dragon’s smoke anyway so it didn’t matter much, but she definitely did it just to spite me. I then insisted that Kay draw an enormous shark about to eat the fish in the box next to us. She drew the outline and Grace and I, but mostly Grace, of course, colored it in. After she was done I wrote “WIN” above the giant shark and, fittingly, “LOSE” below the small rainbow fish. I also wrote “PWNZORD” and drew Trogdor the Burninator which I think I do rather well.
During the times I wasn’t scribbling crap on the sidewalk, I was blowing bubbles at passers-by each time declaring “Have a glorious day.” I only received a response from one woman out of everyone I wished a glorious day, but I got it from her twice since we were coloring for a while and she passed by more than once.
Kay drew something outside her big, happy, black friend Amber’s apartment door since it was her birthday. Afterward, we walked up to a bar or something where a bunch of Amber’s friends were hanging out with her for the occasion. Kay gave her the rest of the chalk we didn’t use while her other friends gave her other thoughtful stuff like, for example, her one friend gave her a rock. I knew her for no more than a few hours and had nothing for her but felt kinda bad regardless. Instead of buying her something, I got her attention and did a back flip off a nearby brick store wall. She was delighted and gave me a hug.
We went back to Kay’s, and took Simone over to Alex and Grace’s to grab our bathing suits because someone, probably I, thought it would be a good idea to go swimming in Kay’s pool after midnight. On the way back I went the wrong way on a one way two lane expressway and got seriously pissed that the road was not properly labeled to prevent it. I hate when I do stupid things because everyone yells at me and I feel like an idiot. I mostly just can’t stand when people ridicule me for a dumb mistake anyone could have made. I don’t like being undermined I guess. I felt a bit better when I later saw a truck towing a boat make the same turn and have to cross over the grassy median to get back on the correct side of the road.
I was the first to dive in the pool and quickly regretted it. I assured everyone it felt great so Grace and Alex joined me. I mounted the inflatable whale, fell off and tried to give a shivering Grace some of my body warmth before we all finally decided to get out.
We watched a pretty cool anime movie in Kay’s basement. That I said that is odd since I normally don’t enjoy that genre of film, but this was far less ridiculous and had a cool story. It was also a good chance for Grace and me to cuddle on the couch. At the beginning of most relationships, I normally just want to hold my mate and ignore the rest of the world. This normally fades with time, but it hasn’t started to with Grace as of yet. I’m not sure when it will and I’m not sure if I want it to.
Alex sat at the other end of our small couch propped up against our legs. At this point Grace and I still hadn’t told him we were dating and weren’t sure how he’d take it. I’d often make jokes about his sister and he’d get noticeably bothered so I wasn’t sure if he’d approve. I love that kid though. He’s just pure; I guess that would be the best term. He’s innocent, and harmless and naïve and above all, fun. It’s never a dull moment with that kid and I’m glad he’s my roommate. I treat him a lot like a younger brother and try to hang out with him as much as I can and help him out with whatever he needs, especially since he doesn’t know how to cook. I am the second of two children so I never had the kind of older, wiser feeling my sister had growing up with me.
Back on topic: There was a dead pixel on Kay’s big screen and it bothered me, but I ignored it well enough to still enjoy the movie. Afterward, Kay said we couldn’t stay for whatever reason so he headed back to Alex and Grace’s place. They didn’t have a key so they pounded on the door until their dad woke up from the couch and let us in. He talked to us drunkenly for a bit, while Grace and Alex insisted on him returning to bed.
He finally passed out again, Alex went to bed and Grace decided we could cuddle a bit on the floor of the living room before she went to bed, but said if she fell asleep there, it would mean trouble. We fooled around a bit, which was a little weird for Grace since her dad was passed out on the couch two feet from us. I felt kind of bad about what we did because I still thought of Grace as naïve and pure and didn’t want to be the one to corrupt that. I now know she’s a freak so I don’t feel so bad. Grace finally went to bed as the sun was beginning to rise.
Let me talk about Grace for a while. I never knew how cool she was until the OC trip and, ironically enough, I have Amber to thank for that. I had thought I found the girl I’d spend my life with when I fell in love with Kelly. That obviously didn’t work out and I was convinced I’d never find someone as perfect as I thought she was. It took a few years, but I honestly think Grace one-ups her. She’s just as intelligent, fun and mature as Kelly was, except with new and improved dark Latin skin, nicer body, less mental issues, happier demeanor and, I guess only important because I’m comparing her to Kelly, Grace is not a lesbian.
I love that Grace is intelligent enough to understand my sense of humor and come back with snaps of her own. She’s passionate and loves to be held. She’s an amazing time in bed and doesn’t think twice about fooling around till sun up. I’m still not sure if anyone I date will ever live up to Amber in the sex department, but I think if Grace and I work together we could come close. She likes sleeping close (Amber didn’t) and she makes me feel so warm when I hold her.
She doesn’t receive compliments often from others, so she’s admittedly defensive when she does. Apparently, which I think is ridiculous, she’s never been the object of so much attention, but I’m forcing her to get used to that. Also, maybe this is just me, but I always whisper when we’re lying close, perhaps to be romantic or serious or something, but Grace normally talks in response. I’m not sure why that bothers me but for some reason I’d consider what she said more sincere if she whispered it. Maybe it just messes with the mood I’m setting with my soft tone. I might be crazy for that one but whatever.
The next day, Alex and Grace tried to find something to eat for breakfast. I grew tired of this quickly and asked “You guys just wanna go out to eat?” So I drove us to Crossroads a few blocks away. I got some eggs and pancakes, Alex got basically the same thing with home fries, and Grace probably got something as well. I know she ate a lot of what Alex ordered. When we got the check, Alex looked for where to pay with his card. Someone told him to ask his waitress so he stood by our table waiting for her. She came by and this short conversation ensued:
“How do I pay this with my card?” -Alex, holding the check.
“Oh, I’ll take that whenever you’re ready.” -Waitress, jolly and walking away.
Alex watched her go and said very disappointedly, “But… I’m ready now.” -Alex, looking genuinely depressed.
It was fucking hilarious. Maybe you had to be there but we were laughing until she took the check and his card and still laughing when she brought the card back. If you missed it a few paragraphs ago, I fucking love that kid.
We returned and watched TV for a few hours which is depressing but was relaxing after the long week. Finally, Alex and I packed up to leave. Grace says she tried to talk to Alex about us over the weekend but he kept avoiding it and changing the subject, so without certainty of his approval, we couldn’t even kiss goodbye.
I told her I’d talk to him in the car and got my chance when we got stuck in traffic. He told me he noticed me and Grace getting pretty close and really didn’t care. I asked him about Grace trying to talk to him and he said he changed the subject because he wanted to rant about shit that was bothering him and that Grace and I weren’t part of that. Later while he was talking to Grace on the phone I yelled at her for not having the simple conversation with Alex I had just completed in minutes, and blamed her for our lack of goodbye kiss. Silly bitch.
So traffic was due to construction and signs told us to merge right claiming that the left TWO lanes were closed. So, everyone was at a stand still. At one point some kid in an SUV two cars ahead of us stood up through the moon roof and started dancing. I thought this was great but Alex missed it. Soon the kid jumped out of the motionless car and just started dancing on the expressway. A girl he didn’t know jumped out of her car to join in, and I quickly popped in my “100 Greatest 90’s Dance Hits” CD, rolled down the windows and blasted “Everybody Dance Now” for our random entertainers.
That was fun. Soon we found that the massive traffic was due, not to the road being cut to one lane, but the signs misinforming the drivers as to which lane they were cut to. The first signs said “Left Two Lanes Closed” so everyone shifted right. A slow half mile/ half hour later, the signs read “Right Two Lanes Closed” so everyone had to shift back to the left. I called 911 to inform them of this misnomer and we continued past the indecisive bottle neck of cars toward Philly. We actually arrived very quickly after freeing ourselves from the retarded tie up on 495 and unpacked the car.
This summer break was probably the most active I’ve been in such a short time in a very long time and it was very interesting and almost always a lot of fun. I definitely think OC MD should happen every summer from now on and I can’t wait for next year.
If you seriously read all of this, I applaud you as there were probably a few dozen more important and interesting things you could have been doing. Have fun, and I promise I’ll try to make the next one shorter.