Halford Blues
First order of business is this post is entirely Halford/Weight Loss oriented .... You've been warned and I'll put the actual whine behind a cut for the benefit of all those not interested.
I've got work I desperately need to be doing, but I've got to vent a little or I'm not going to get anything accomplished.
I was doing good and lost 2.5 of the 5 pounds I gained at Christmas. But then I hit a brick wall. I've gained that 2.5 back plus 4 more! That makes me up 9 pounds from where I was at Thanksgiving. IT HAS TO STOP!!!!! I'm almost near tears over this. Tears of frustration!
I went to my support group meeting last night and the therapist talked for an hour about stress and how it effects us mentally and physically. And when she started listing the symptoms of stress I started thinking, "Hey, that's me to a tee." I'm under stress? Dale and I even talked about it on the way home and he thinks maybe I am. The problem is neither one of us know exactly what is causing me this much stress.
She talked about the vicious cycle of how stress causes us to crave carbs which in turn leads to more anxiety over the food choices which leads to stress which causes us to want more carbs. *sigh*
That is me ... and I may have answered my own question. What is causing me so much stress? My weight loss perhaps ... or lack there of. I know what my therapist will tell me Monday when I go for my session: You need to forgive yourself and move forward. That is so much easier said than done. It's hard to forgive yourself when you are making a payment in the amount of a small car payment every month for a surgery to help you loose weight and then you GAIN weight. Right now I'm feeling like this is just another one of my failed dieting attempts although the logical part of my brain knows that is not true. I've still lost 65 pounds. But for some reason I can't focus on that positive part of it ... only the negativeness of the weight gain.
What I need to do is form a plan of action. Get back into drinking 64 oz of water a day. Get back into 30 minutes of exercise everyday. And getting back into yoga wouldn't be such a bad thing either. The relaxation techniques at the end of a yoga session tend to help center me. Maybe if I can focus on those thing the eating will fall back into place naturally.
And what I really need is for Halford to go on strike again and not let me eat for about a week to help purge those damn carb cravings. Are you listening little buddy? Do me a favor and tighten yourself up! Surely I need to be punished for something! LOL
I could go have Dr. Wheeler tighten him, but I struggle eating good food right now. I don't want to make it anymore difficult to eat the good stuff. I just want him to go on strike for a bit and then let me eat the good stuff. Right now he's more partial to cookies and crackers than chicken and veggies. And that is one of the great mysteries of the band ....
Secondly, I'm going to create a filter for all of these types of posts. This post isn't going to be filtered though. If you want me to add you to the "Halford" filter just give me a yell and let me know, otherwise I won't add you. I realize it's not the most exciting read, but I'm really struggling right now and need an outlet of sorts.
I've got work I desperately need to be doing, but I've got to vent a little or I'm not going to get anything accomplished.
I was doing good and lost 2.5 of the 5 pounds I gained at Christmas. But then I hit a brick wall. I've gained that 2.5 back plus 4 more! That makes me up 9 pounds from where I was at Thanksgiving. IT HAS TO STOP!!!!! I'm almost near tears over this. Tears of frustration!
I went to my support group meeting last night and the therapist talked for an hour about stress and how it effects us mentally and physically. And when she started listing the symptoms of stress I started thinking, "Hey, that's me to a tee." I'm under stress? Dale and I even talked about it on the way home and he thinks maybe I am. The problem is neither one of us know exactly what is causing me this much stress.
She talked about the vicious cycle of how stress causes us to crave carbs which in turn leads to more anxiety over the food choices which leads to stress which causes us to want more carbs. *sigh*
That is me ... and I may have answered my own question. What is causing me so much stress? My weight loss perhaps ... or lack there of. I know what my therapist will tell me Monday when I go for my session: You need to forgive yourself and move forward. That is so much easier said than done. It's hard to forgive yourself when you are making a payment in the amount of a small car payment every month for a surgery to help you loose weight and then you GAIN weight. Right now I'm feeling like this is just another one of my failed dieting attempts although the logical part of my brain knows that is not true. I've still lost 65 pounds. But for some reason I can't focus on that positive part of it ... only the negativeness of the weight gain.
What I need to do is form a plan of action. Get back into drinking 64 oz of water a day. Get back into 30 minutes of exercise everyday. And getting back into yoga wouldn't be such a bad thing either. The relaxation techniques at the end of a yoga session tend to help center me. Maybe if I can focus on those thing the eating will fall back into place naturally.
And what I really need is for Halford to go on strike again and not let me eat for about a week to help purge those damn carb cravings. Are you listening little buddy? Do me a favor and tighten yourself up! Surely I need to be punished for something! LOL
I could go have Dr. Wheeler tighten him, but I struggle eating good food right now. I don't want to make it anymore difficult to eat the good stuff. I just want him to go on strike for a bit and then let me eat the good stuff. Right now he's more partial to cookies and crackers than chicken and veggies. And that is one of the great mysteries of the band ....
Secondly, I'm going to create a filter for all of these types of posts. This post isn't going to be filtered though. If you want me to add you to the "Halford" filter just give me a yell and let me know, otherwise I won't add you. I realize it's not the most exciting read, but I'm really struggling right now and need an outlet of sorts.