On Monday morning the drops rolled down with seemingly greater than their usual speed. There was something ominous about the way they placed themselves, the pattern they formed, on that particular day. Trickling down mercilessly, they reminded her only of her own helplessness against the laws of gravity. But, alas, her awestruck contemplation of ( Read more... )

The studious had been sitting in McKibbin’s Library for hours when I walked in after my 10:30 class. I was not there to study or to even read for that matter. Choose your battles wisely, they say. I’m not sure what I expected from the head librarian at McKibbin’s on that Monday morning. Surely others had questioned the obscene processing fee ( Read more... )

One of the first stories I heard when I arrived in Gainesville this past May for a pre-UF-enrolment visit was the story of Phil’s fictional crimes and subsequent non-fictional police harassment. The police had been to Phil’s house the same day I arrived into town and, despite the unusually stressful day, Phil took some time out to meet with me and ( Read more... )

To make life easier on myself, I've decided to insert two guest decalogues into the Decameron. So you'll all get to enjoy the magnificent writing of Velina Manolova for the next ten days while I build up a larger buffer, catch up on my work, and generally recharge. Then I'll come back with story #41.

Until then... Velina!

They asked her whether she'd donate money to their fund to start a children's show featuring an anthropomorphic polar kraken as the lead character. It would sing, and dance. About friendship. And world peace.

And when she said no, they fed her to the star.

Everyone got so upset over the number - over the fact that they shot an unarmed man 41 times. And there was all the usual hand-wringing about racism, and how the media portrays blacks as dangerous and makes everybody jumpy. And, I mean, I sympathize - I do think the media's to blame. It's just... I mean ( Read more... )

I told her it was different. That when you close a book, the words are still on the page. When you turn off the TV, the transmission continues without you. DVDs and video tapes all hold their contents, perfectly preserved, waiting for us to return. But games are different. The game is only complete when I am playing it. Its story and world don't ( Read more... )

Batboy and I are secret lovers. Nostradamus is going to preside over our wedding. We're getting married on a UFO.

We were going to take our honeymoon in Atlantis, but I was afraid he'd leave me for a merman.

I should have married a birdman, so I could have just clipped his wings.

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In the later part of his life, he built moats throughout his house, and filled them with alligators. Vast chasms separated the bathrooms from the rest of the house. Intricate systems of falling rock traps and spike pits lined every room. The highlight of the whole thing, of course, was the giant boulder ( Read more... )

I never wanted this for myself. I could have been anything. A handbag. A jacket. I could have been a shirt. Prada could have made me.

Instead, I'm cozied up to a sweaty guy's dick as he swings around with monkeys.

It sucks to be a loincloth.