i'm so fucking lonely....god damn, i'm fucking crying right now....why the fuck am i crying? it doesn't make sense..there's gotta be something more than just this....i need more, this just isn't enough...i'm going nuts..loners fucking need love, too..geez, i really sound like a moron after saying cheesy shit like that, don't i? god, i'm pathetic... ( Read more... )

hubby still sleeping, kiddo in bed, and i'm bored..wanna go do something..last place i wanna be on a friday night is stuck at home with no one to talk to and nothing to get my rocks off with...tempted to take car and drive down the street to see what my friends are up to...haven't seen them in a little over a week now..wondering what's going on? ( Read more... )

well, the man has not awakened to make dinner and so i've resorted to ordering from pizza hut..so now i wait for my food to arrive so i can suffocate myself with pepperoni..as i sit here, trying in vain to find something worth watching on basic cable, i wonder if i'm really just a bad person inside...i really don't think i am cuz i know a lot of ( Read more... )

here we go again..another friday night of having to deal with the hubby's bothersome lack of sleep...having a spouse with a night job when you don't have a night job fucking sucks..after more than 3 years of this, i want it to end...he promised he'd make dinner tonight and now what is he doing? sleeping on the god damn living room floor again..he ( Read more... )

ah..just a cup of milk and some powdered sugar donuts and i'm feeling fine...had a great early hour fuckathon with the hubby, then jumped into a torrent of cold water to clean myself off..usually i hate cold showers, but it just felt like the right thing to do today...funny how i can make my nipples hard and yet not be horny anymore..the hubby ( Read more... )

Haikus of Slave and Its Master ( Read more... )

hmm...what to say, what to say....it's one am and i'm awake as hell...listening to static x again and wishing i was at the club making some cash...but the hubby won't allow that, so, oh well..i totally understand his reasoning, but at the same time, knowing how much we're struggling and knowing that all i gotta do is get naked and shake it to get ( Read more... )

howling 4 is on sci fi channel..has to be one of the most boring flicks i've ever seen, but there's not much else on. oh, where is b5 crusade when you need it? they need to make some more episodes!!! i don't know if i can wait another friggin month for first wave to come back on...it's driving us crazy! looking forward to playing my new vlarp ( Read more... )

here it is, am getting dinner ready and preparing to wake the beast from his slumber...and wondering if i need a damn scanner to post a picture of little old crappy me...and which picture to use...hmmm.....

what is it really? i feel love but i then i don't feel love..it's weird...is he just gonna become a roommate that i hang out with once in a while if i'm lucky? is he just gonna be another buddy for me to casually screw? i want to be 'in love' but i've done that already...there's not much left after that, is there? sometimes i feel more like his ( Read more... )