I'll probably end up revising that section a little (the detail actions, not the dialogue), but is there anything here, too, that you can pick out in need of work? :)
I was wondering if Subaru did tell Arashi and Sorata that he sat with his mouth open in the dark waiting for flies and Sei-chan, because saying that seemed a little OOC. And speaking of that scene I loved how you placed the "Arashi said nothing".
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Thank you!
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