*crawls out from behind rock*
Okay, so sorry for the kind of outburst yesterday. I guess I just need to put a few things straight and my head was literally all over the place and making it impossible :(
First of all, half the shit I was angry about yesterday had nothing to do with fandom. My family is a bit of a mess right now and I'm struggling trying to deal with both of my parents having a mid-life crisis while still trying to sort out my own head and remain calm throughout. It's not easy, man. =/ What sucks is that fandom, the place I used to come to escape all that, has literally been falling apart. A couple weeks ago I was dealing really well with Ianto's death and fandom was becoming a bearable place, but now with all the RTD wank and the news of a fourth season, being a part of it just makes me miserable.
Right now, I am not in the mood to defend myself and my opinions. I don't agree with RTD's comments in his interviews or at comic con and YES, I think he's a total smug bastard. I don't care if you agree or disagree with that, but I don't really want to discuss it any further. Or read about it every day on my flist. I'm going to de-friend savethecoffeeboy for now because that used to be a positive, fun community to support Ianto and now it's just turned into a wank fest about RTD and I don't want to read ANYTHING ELSE about him at the moment.
As for JB, I didn't like his comments about Ianto, but I'm not reading any further into them because I KNOW that he talks out his arse and doesn't think before he speaks. I really don't think it says ANYTHING about his relationship with Gareth David-Lloyd and it sucks that people are creating that link. None of us know Gareth or John personally. All we know about them is what they want us to see and what they show us at the conventions, behind the scenes ect. We'll never know more than that. You can draw your own conclusions from what we see, but you can't try and tell other people where their relationship is at. Let's all just move on and wait for hub 3. (BEST NEWS I'VE HEARD IN MONTHS)
... I'm kinda going off on a tangent and straying away from the point of this entry. Basically, I'm taking a step back. Fandom is draining all my energy at a time when I really need it and while I don't object to people having their own opinions, I'm feeling selfish right now and DON'T WANT TO READ THEM IF THEY UPSET ME. I'm not directing this at anyone nor do I want to fall out over it, I just don't have any patience left to stay calm right now.
I have no idea if any of this makes sense and I've probably contradicted myself like WOAH. I don't care. I'm tired. I just wanted to write this down and get it out my system.
As for my fic, I will resume writing eventually. I've decided to keep writing too and just de-friend all the non-fic communites when all the series 4 stuff starts showing up. I don't wish to be a part of any of that, but I would like to be a part of the Torchwood I know and love. CoE not included.
Kay. I'm done. I think.