App Post
Character: Violet Baudelaire
Series: A Series of Unfortunate Events
Character Age: 15
Canon:It will probably not surprise you to learn that Violet Baudelaire is the eldest of three siblings, and the daughter of two parents. However, unless you are as villainous as their murderers, it will shock and horrify you to discover that both those parents were killed in an act of arson, a phrase which here means "a terrible fire." Following this tragedy, Violet, Klaus and Sunny (her brother and sister) have been forced from one dreadful situation to the next, all the while pursued by Count Olaf, an evil and unhygienic man who wishes to steal their fortune for himself. They in turn are pursuing information about a mysterious organization known only as "VFD," in the hopes that it will help them understand the turns their lives have taken, but are frequently thwarted by false leads.
Violet is a resourceful young woman with a great knack for inventing (a clause which here means, "she's MacGyver with a hair ribbon"). Under the most perilous conditions and with the most unlikely materials, she's proven capable of creating anything from a staple-making device to crampons. Her circumstances have driven her to become mistrustful of all strangers, especially adults, but despite much adversity she remains polite, kind, determined, and extremely loyal to her siblings. She's also pretty, given to understatement, and quite capable of lighting your fucking hotel on fire if she thinks you'll hurt her family.
Pardon me. Have you seen a boy about thirteen years old with dark hair and glasses, or a baby girl with very sharp teeth? I'd be glad to provide any service I can if somebody will tell me where to find them. For example, I could easily invent a device to remove the blood from your shower system. I'm sure I saw a hairnet, a magnet, and a packet of juice crystals that would do the trick. But my siblings and I must be on our way. The "VFD" signs made me think this might be the place we were looking for, but a "Vacuous Fluff Dispenser" certainly wasn't what I expected to find, and I'd really prefer not to have to explain what a "Varnished Fornication Device" is to my sister. I don't quite understand how it works myself, and I'm not that curious!
Actually, there's a lot here I don't want to take a closer look at. I don't want to seem rude, but some of the residents here at Camp, ah. . . Fuck You Die? Oh dear. Some of the residents seem quite unhealthy. In fact, they seem undead. My only other experience with zombies has been in entertaining films, so I'm hardly an expert in monster identification, but I saw one carrying its own head by the hair. I'm not a biology expert, either, but that's not possible for a living human being. Maybe a zombie repelling device would be more useful than a clean shower. I know I saw plenty of big sticks...
Alright, look. I don't think I'm a coward, but I have no intention of staying here any longer. Will someone please tell me where my siblings are? Despite the reassurances that plenty of "emo orphans" have been stuck here before -- and is emo even a real adjective? -- we really must go at once. I'm sorry that I couldn't provide you with anything useful, but some of your requests were strange, incomprehensible, or downright obscene. I'm not sure why anybody would want a "Crack Creator," unless they were trying to break something, I don't even know what an "App Articulator" is, and -- oh, for goodness sake! I will most definitely not be inventing a "Violet Fondling Device" for any of you!
In at 94.7% (54/57)