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I've really got myself into quite the rut here. I've made it so I just CANNOT get work done while at home. This has put quite a dent in my pocket, as I pack up my laptop and all my file folders and head downtown to a coffee shop or tea house, where I am forced to do nothing but work. It is getting ridiculous. Where did my discipline go? I've ( Read more... )

BOTH SIDES of my bed are unmade! The sheets are lying there in little mountains and valleys, reminding me of last night ( Read more... )

At this point I am just on the other side of myself. I can't think, concentrate, nothing. I feel like I'm going to explode. I want to skip around my house (only the stairs get in the way), yelling. Not yelling words or anything like that. Just yelling. I have papers to grade. Can't do it ( Read more... )

Yesterday I drank coffee at two in the afternoon. Last night a lay awake all night, tossing and turning, kicking myself for the caffeine intake. But maybe it was more than the caffeine. I felt like it was Christmas Eve at the age of five years old. Today couldn't come fast enough, so I'd tell myself just fall asleep. The sooner you fall asleep ( Read more... )

So I was supposed to have been finishing two of the items on my "to do" list, instead, I was sucked into A River Runs Through It on the Superstation. Why I even turn that TV on is beyond me. It's sick. But I love that movie. While watching it, I was trying to eat my lunch, but I got so sad, I nearly lost my appetite. I haven't seen that movie ( Read more... )

I'm so blah, down-and-out, depressed, etc.. I'm frustrated about the gym. I haven't been able to go in over a month because of my numerous illnesses. It's really getting me down, not to mention, I'm terrified about starting up again. It's not starting again, it's STARTING OVER! It's going to be frustrating to get exhuasted at first, but I know ( Read more... )

augh. *loud scream ( Read more... )

i HATE when i can't get to my friends page. so i decided to stay home and watch TV like the veggie i am quickly becoming. like a big 'ole butternut squash...'cuz even though in real life i'm very top-heavy...i'm just feeling squashish tonight. and now i'm all full of regrets. giving up seeing pamela means. i just feel so shitty. i'm so sick ( Read more... )

i'm super unmotivated and drained of energy, and it's only 11 o'clock in the morning. i have so much to do today...before i go see pamela means play tonight (poor me...boo hoo). my house is freezing, as i let the fire burn out 'cuz it smelled so horrible. i know what i need to do. i need to bundle up, gather my papers to grade, my laundry to ( Read more... )