"Tears don't mean you're losing, everybody's bruising, it's okay not to be okay"
I was so happy to find my old MP3 player last night which has A Fine Frenzy on it!! :D 3 ALBUMS! But then the first song that came up was.... .Almost Lover. OF COURSE. WHAT ELSE WOULD IT HAVE BEEN. ¬_¬
Almost Lover
your fingertips across my skin
the palm trees swaying in the wind
images
you sang me Spanish lullabyes
the sweetest sadness in your eyes
clever trick
I'd never wanna see
you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me
Goodbye my Almost Lover
Goodbye my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
can't you just let me be?
So long my luckless romance
my back is turned on you
shoulda known you'd bring me heartache
Almost Lovers always do...
We walked along a crowded street
you took my hand and danced with me
images
And when you left you kissed my lips
Told me you would never forget these
images
I cannot go to the ocean
I cannot drive the streets at night
I cannot wake up in the morning
without you on my mind
So you're gone and I'm haunted
And I bet you are just... fine
Do I make it that easy
to walk right in and out
of my life?
[It has WAY more effect if you can actualz hear the song. The sound.... just. Well. It r compleat.]
Friday night I was going to my brother's house and someone left a newspaper on the bus. I picked it up and it was BOOOORING [anyone ever read Skyport? Don't. ¬_¬] BUT. I ripped out my horrorscope. Which be:
Now that you've decided that this is the year you're going to banish old self-doubt and have more faith and belief in yourself, you won't mess about. In fact you'll hit the ground running. It's a new year, a new you and you intend to turn your life on its head a little at a time. Go for it!
YEAH. OKAY. I DON'T HAVE A CLUE WHAT THAT'S TALKING ABOUT *cough cough LEAVING EVERYTHING BEHIND AND MOVING TO GLASTONBURY SOON PLZ cough cough*
Also, who the fucking retarded fuckface of EVER calls the 0904 number at the end of suchlike? "ooooh, pay us £6 a minute for the phone call to find out what you'd have found out eventually anyway PPPPPLLLLZZZZZZ!" Fucking cuntfaced bastard asses. WITH SMALL DICKS ON THEIR HEADS!!!!
Anyway I FUCKING LOVE my niece [WHOSE NAME IS VIOLET *_* HSLSUISUM .......I KNOW] When she was tiny- like 4 or 5 months old, I used to go into my brother's room and take her away when he & Sara were arguing & shouting. Wrap her up all snug, put on some meditation music to help her sleep.... I felt such ultimate and strong LOVE in those times holding her.
I didn't have anything to do with her for about 6 years of her life due to disputes over my brother being a dick [which he SO can be] Now. It's just. Okay, she CAN be annoying sometimes but that's only because she is ... scarily like watching myself. She's fucking crazy and funny and the other night I was there, she was like "you HAVE to watch me dance!!" So I'm all "okay" and... holy shit. It was SERIOUSLY like watching myself. She was dancing in the way that I was dancing-badly-on-purpose that night at Feeling Gloomy for the Worst Dancer Competition AND FUCKING WON XD XD XD
I feel good for her though- when I was 11 you weren't "allowed" to be yourself. These days it seems a bit like the gay revolution- being who you are is actually encouraged. Great, I fully support that. But. Shouldn't it have always been that way? Why is it so strange to be Okay-no-matter-who-you-are all of a sudden?
Pffft. Today's poetrees. First in YEARS:
9:45 am
Antirociprical [It's not happening]
Determined,
this time.
It grew with this bruise
It'll fade with it too
The Secret Song
has a distant perspective
in the light of this
cold day
Not 10 hours ago
It was reading my mind
and making it sound good.
The very thing that has
convinced me to just
stop.
To think-
a dream that never existed
almost destroyed
the only one
my hope hangs on...
=====================================================
1:30 pm
Back at the place well-known
and near-forgotten
I don't think I've ever
merely craved a scent
Nailing it home
just needs to be done,
these reminders
these shocks of truth
bring back the why
of the way things are
and are meant
to continue.
Almost Lover
your fingertips across my skin
the palm trees swaying in the wind
images
you sang me Spanish lullabyes
the sweetest sadness in your eyes
clever trick
I'd never wanna see
you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me
Goodbye my Almost Lover
Goodbye my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
can't you just let me be?
So long my luckless romance
my back is turned on you
shoulda known you'd bring me heartache
Almost Lovers always do...
We walked along a crowded street
you took my hand and danced with me
images
And when you left you kissed my lips
Told me you would never forget these
images
I cannot go to the ocean
I cannot drive the streets at night
I cannot wake up in the morning
without you on my mind
So you're gone and I'm haunted
And I bet you are just... fine
Do I make it that easy
to walk right in and out
of my life?
[It has WAY more effect if you can actualz hear the song. The sound.... just. Well. It r compleat.]
Friday night I was going to my brother's house and someone left a newspaper on the bus. I picked it up and it was BOOOORING [anyone ever read Skyport? Don't. ¬_¬] BUT. I ripped out my horrorscope. Which be:
Now that you've decided that this is the year you're going to banish old self-doubt and have more faith and belief in yourself, you won't mess about. In fact you'll hit the ground running. It's a new year, a new you and you intend to turn your life on its head a little at a time. Go for it!
YEAH. OKAY. I DON'T HAVE A CLUE WHAT THAT'S TALKING ABOUT *cough cough LEAVING EVERYTHING BEHIND AND MOVING TO GLASTONBURY SOON PLZ cough cough*
Also, who the fucking retarded fuckface of EVER calls the 0904 number at the end of suchlike? "ooooh, pay us £6 a minute for the phone call to find out what you'd have found out eventually anyway PPPPPLLLLZZZZZZ!" Fucking cuntfaced bastard asses. WITH SMALL DICKS ON THEIR HEADS!!!!
Anyway I FUCKING LOVE my niece [WHOSE NAME IS VIOLET *_* HSLSUISUM .......I KNOW] When she was tiny- like 4 or 5 months old, I used to go into my brother's room and take her away when he & Sara were arguing & shouting. Wrap her up all snug, put on some meditation music to help her sleep.... I felt such ultimate and strong LOVE in those times holding her.
I didn't have anything to do with her for about 6 years of her life due to disputes over my brother being a dick [which he SO can be] Now. It's just. Okay, she CAN be annoying sometimes but that's only because she is ... scarily like watching myself. She's fucking crazy and funny and the other night I was there, she was like "you HAVE to watch me dance!!" So I'm all "okay" and... holy shit. It was SERIOUSLY like watching myself. She was dancing in the way that I was dancing-badly-on-purpose that night at Feeling Gloomy for the Worst Dancer Competition AND FUCKING WON XD XD XD
I feel good for her though- when I was 11 you weren't "allowed" to be yourself. These days it seems a bit like the gay revolution- being who you are is actually encouraged. Great, I fully support that. But. Shouldn't it have always been that way? Why is it so strange to be Okay-no-matter-who-you-are all of a sudden?
Pffft. Today's poetrees. First in YEARS:
9:45 am
Antirociprical [It's not happening]
Determined,
this time.
It grew with this bruise
It'll fade with it too
The Secret Song
has a distant perspective
in the light of this
cold day
Not 10 hours ago
It was reading my mind
and making it sound good.
The very thing that has
convinced me to just
stop.
To think-
a dream that never existed
almost destroyed
the only one
my hope hangs on...
=====================================================
1:30 pm
Back at the place well-known
and near-forgotten
I don't think I've ever
merely craved a scent
Nailing it home
just needs to be done,
these reminders
these shocks of truth
bring back the why
of the way things are
and are meant
to continue.