First Rule, Don't Talk: Nick + Bucky: for iced_soldier

[pushmefirst]

He hadn't slept well since he came here.. but then Nick was a veteran at functioning on minimal hours. His body was the type that just couldn't wind down completely; something always keeping him up, alert and tense. So, for him to actually drift to warm conciousness and the smell of roasted coffee beans grinding in a filter? He thought he was

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[iced_soldier]

Bucky had always been an early riser. So, it was no surprise that he was up several hours before his bedmate

[pushmefirst]

"Hey..." Nick said first, not a big fan of the awkward silence or any opening to show he didn't know what to do. He smelt good, he noticed, clean.. and the inside of his own mouth was like wool. He rubbed his hand across his eyes and scowled, "I, uh... I'm gonna go wake up s'more..."

And then we'll talk. Why can't he just say that? He wanted it out of the way if there was any to be done, but...

Sliding out of the sheets, he stooped a bit as he found his feet again, stretching again outside of it. His back arching out as he yawned. "Hope to Hell you left some coffee spare..."

[iced_soldier]

“Yeah, there’s coffee, but you’ll have to reheat it. Made it a while ago.” Bucky sat up, too, then stood and stretched. “I guess you needed the sleep?” He pulled on a t-shirt and headed into the kitchen. He’d need another cup of coffee, too, as well as some food. He was glad he’d brewed a whole pot.

[pushmefirst]

"I really did." He feels like he should be thanking him, but.. to him, that much sleep was bad. He didn't want to be off-kilter. His shower is bracingly cold for a reason, almost like he's punishing himself. When he steps out, it's in a towel because he has to cross the hall over for his own room.. so he's glad he's not there. He couldn't take a smart remark, likely or not.

"Hey - you'd ingest the beans up, too if you could." He smacks the back of his head in greeting as he joins him, clean shirt and jeans on. Ready to start the day - whether busy or not. He liked being ready.

[iced_soldier]

Bucky's voice rose as he continued angrily. "Some reassurance from you would be nice. Some confirmation that I'm not just making a fool of myself with this. Cause I can't read your freakin' mind and you're sure as hell not helpin' with the whole feelin' stupid thing. I've got no idea what's going on in your head right now or how you feel about what happened or if you regret anything."

[pushmefirst]

Well - that was enough to surprise him, and unfortunately raise his hackles.

"I don't know what you want!" he retorted quickly, eyes narrowing. He wasn't the only one who couldn't read minds here! Nick brushed both hands up through his hair, fingers raking as he calms enough to speak quieter, lower. "Look. I'm shit at this anyway without -- I would have gotten there eventually."

He just needed some damn space - not feeling stupid for hoping maybe, himself! Darkened blue eyes meet his sternly as he adds, "does what I feel matter all that much? Is it gonna change what you tell me?"

In short: he needed to know what he meant, exactly, before he could answer.

"Why don't you carry on the honesty first..." A short breath. "Maybe you need it, well as me..."

[iced_soldier]

His eyes narrowed. "And when would you have gotten there, hmm? Probably at the worst time possible."

Nick's questions had a frustrated noise coming out of the smaller man. "Yes, it matters what you think!" How could Nick not have known that?

[pushmefirst]

"Okay.. so let's count this off again." He glares at him pointedly, laying himself out into the open here - nowhere near as much as he did, because yeah.. he still didn't feel like he could. He was so closed off, had been all his life. But if that was what he needed.. he figured he owed it now. "I stopped you from just leavin' without me - told you I want you, oh, and I slept the whole night. I shouldn't need to tell you I never do that." But I am. Because...

He let out a long, slow breath... tired already. It was always exhausting even having a conversation because they clashed so much. Nick met his gaze directly - figuring even this might not cut it, so.

"What you did... I didn't think you could ever do." Not seriously, not like that - looking like that. "So.. how I feel? It's... even more complicated now." Emotionally so. And he didn't know how to deal with that.

Fuck. He better have understood - he wasn't sure how else to put it without spelling it out more.

ZOMG SO MANY THREADS TODAY

[iced_soldier]

Bucky laughed, shaking his head. "Fair enough. We can have a lazy day today." Like he said before, this guy had a way of tiring him out. The day may have just begun, but he was already tired from the emotionally-laden conversation they'd had.

lol it's just POV - don't worry about tagging! ^^;

[pushmefirst]

"Somethin's up with you lately, alright." All the honesty, the laying bare. It was disconcerting.. but really damn attractive too. This could be trouble.

Nick muses over it, biting his lip as he leans over with the slightly steaming plate, catching his eyes as he looks up. "I'm startin' to like it, though.."

All the threads, bb. All the threads.

[iced_soldier]

That gets another smirk out of him. "Are ya, now? You should see what else I can do." And there was a bit of his sexually suggestive, smartassy self.

/squee! :3

[pushmefirst]

"Save it for later... think I need to recover first." Here, he gave a quick, deliberate once-over - implying he'd had more than his physical surprise and fill at least. But it was as much referring to their conversation as that.

"Eat. I'm gonna go do weights and shit."

Because taking it easy didn't mean total slacking off.