i took a five minute bus ride to the library, and sat by the window with three thick photography books collapsing from my lap: my hands overlapping the pages in thick feeling, strumming my fingers over the pictures. there were pictures of piling cigarettes and its hidden beauty seeping out of the hazy smoke. unbuttoned shirts of middle aged drunks
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not to be egotistical or anything.
i miss your writing, and your thoughts on my thoughts. im getting my phone hooked up soon hopefully; we'll talk. i hope you're doin good. im finally starting to really feel in control of my life, in all ways, except for those you can do nothing about. i accept that i know nothing, and i still love trying to learn everything that i can. most importantly, ive been writing lately, and feel as if im coming to something: my work is finally coming to fruitition. this is crucial. occasionally she'll catch me staring into the sun.
love charlie
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