Riddle 034: We don't need no education [Backdated to the First Day of School]

[puzzlerprince]

[Well, it's that time of year once again, isn't it? School's back in session. Oh, joy. Throughout the day, there's a good chance you'll bump into the Riddler in a few locations...

A. ACTION - Mayfield High School, Ethics Classroom, Morning

The words "Mr. Nigma" are written up on the blackboard. Yep. You heard that right. Edward Nigma, Ethics Teacher.

Comments

C, filtered

[beyondthecowl]

[Really? Seriously?]

. . . Don't ever call me when I'm at work again. Now what the hell do you want?

[Yeah, he's clearly not thrilled to be hearing the Riddler's voice on the other end of the line.]

[Filtered]

[puzzlerprince]

Take it easy, old chum. We have some fairly important matters to discuss. Namely... what happened shortly after the Milkman was named Police Chief.

[Filtered]

[beyondthecowl]

Do we? You got what you wanted. There's nothing left to discuss.

[He's tempted to hang up at this point, but hesitates.]

[Filtered]

[puzzlerprince]

That wasn't me. And even if I was in control, that certainly isn't the sort of victory over you that I would have wanted.

a

[heteropennae]

-... She's suddenly trying very hard to not be noticed. Which is hard, what with the wings and tail. Oops.-

[puzzlerprince]

[Yeah, he's noticed.]

How about you?

[heteropennae]

U-um, well... What sort of decisions are you interested in?

A

[redirections]

You're really expecting me to tell you my fucking life story but because I got stuck in your shitty class?

Get over yourself, bastard.

[puzzlerprince]

...excuse me?

[redirections]

You heard me. Or are you deaf, too?

[puzzlerprince]

Question: What is your name?

B

[partysense]

[in the teacher's lounge. somehow.

don't ask questions. there is no place in Mayfield Pinkie cannot infiltrate.]

Hi Mister Edward! So you're at your job, huh??? This is your job?? Is it? Cool! Really cool! I guess you're a teacher and this is a school! Neat! Why is it so smoky in here? Am I allowed here? I don't go to school any more, I work at Sugarcube Corner. But school is really fun and I enjoy it and what subject do you teach? I bet you are a great teacher! Oh, oh, I know, I bet you teach... riddles! Hehehehe, just kidding! That can't be a real class! When do you finish work? What's for dinner? Can I make dinner? Can I help you barbecue? I'll prepare dessert! Oh and now that it's September it's going to be fall soon and I'm gonna knit sweaters! Your favorite color is green right?? So I should make you a green sweater?? I'm making Gummy a green sweater, too! You guys can match. Miss Susan's will be pink 'cause I think she'd look great in pink and mine will be pink too and all of us will match! Anyway my friend Fluttershy got

[puzzlerprince]

[Oh god oh god why is she still talking to---wait. Wait, is she done? So much of that was lost on Eddie, but the most important thing he's gleamed from all this?]

Wait. So you want to throw a party for your friends. And these friends are also ponies. Right?

[The last thing he needs in this house is more Pinkie Pies.]

[partysense]

...Yes!

[luckily for the entire world, Pinkie is the craziest. the rest are mroe tolerable.]

[puzzlerprince]

[Shudder. Shudder, shudder.]

...have you already asked Susan? [She'll veto this. She's the smart one. But he's the smarter one.]

A

[c_o_u_r_a_g_e]

[Being from a prep school, Blaine immediately thinks he's to write Mr Nigma an essay and gets to work right away!!]

[puzzlerprince]

[Eddie approaches Blaine's desk after a moment.]

What are you working on?

[c_o_u_r_a_g_e]

[He stops, slowly looking up]

Answering your questions, Mr. Nigma, sir.

[puzzlerprince]

Mind if I take a look?