good, old-fashioned, justifiable anger

[pvflaggirl]

So it only took me four months but I finally got angry about the whole [best man] thing. Yes, I was angry about that obscene email, but once I got over that whole ordeal I really wasn't angry at all. I actually was having the opposite of that problem for awhile. Not only was I feeling very... kindly... towards him, I was also making excuses (to

Comments

[batgirl801]

I really hate myself for not saying anything to you on Saturday about this, but I think you are looking FAN-fucking-TASTIC.

Seriously. So, great job! even if it did take an emotional hurricane (great imagery, btw) to get you going, I think it's awesome.

I am so so so happy that you are moving into anger, and then to whatever comes after anger on the scale of emotions. I really think that you'll be able to move past it. And I am really really happy that you spoke to [who I told you talk to] about everything and worked some things out there.

on a semi-related note, How are you doing it? any advice? I am sick and tired of myself, but unsure on how to change. :( help a sistah out!

[pvflaggirl]

Eat less. It's kind of like a self-imposed weight watchers. It's remarkable now, because my stomach has shrunk and I literally cannot eat the volume of food I had been eating, to even think I was capable of eating as much in a day as I was.

I also have been paying attention to carbs. I haven't given them up (because what is life without bread, pasta, rice and sugar...) but I do try to limit them whenever I can.

It started out by my not being able to eat for those four days and I dropped below 250 and just decided... okay, I am never going to see 25X on the scale again. Every time I dip another 10 lbs, I tell myself that again. Okay, I am never going to see 24X, never going to see 23X... I'm 2 lbs away from saying 22X.

To be honest, I have a day now and then when I feel hungry, and on those days I do eat heartier meals, but it hasn't really been that hard.

[tigergerer]

So I stuck at staying involved in LJ world, but I'm surprised the exchange had such an emotional toll on you. You are one of the strongest women I know. In college, you were my Emotional Strength Magnetic North.

I'm glad you're moving through emotions, but that desire to see him hasn't gone away for a reason, IMHO. It could still be there for myriad reasons: you still need to be angry at him, you want to yell at him, you actually want to be friends... or more, etc. I don't know. I'm a sucker for romance. And proponent for yelling at people. :)

On that related note, I wish I had the willpower to decrease my food intake. Matthew and I ate the entire Helluvagood small container of french onion dip. And then he went to the store yesterday to get two more. Yum.

[pvflaggirl]

Oh friend... I know we've already been over this but it was via text message and I didn't get to expand