Entry #05 - "The Chance You Take"

[severina2001]

Title: The Chance You Take
Written By: siren_mage
Timeline: High School AU
Rating: M
Warnings: some violence and sexual content
Genre: AU, romance

Comments

[spuzz]

WHOEVER WROTE THIS CAN HAVE MY FIRST BORN. IT WILL BE IN WRITING AND I WILL SIGN IT WITH BLOOD IF YOU WANT.

[siren_mage]

:) That's all right, I have no use for a child but I'll take sexual favours. ;)

[spuzz]

I TOTALLY CALLED FIRST DIBBS YOU JERK.

I WILL FIGHT YOU FOR IT!

[spuzz]

FINE. OK. WE'LL MEET AT THE VIRTUAL FLAGPOLE AT 3:30 PM CENTRAL STANDARD TIME AND NO LATER.

:X

[charlie_jae]

I can never say this enough but I love AU's. Highschool one's rank high up there with me. The jumping points from month to month was a nice touch, it wasn't anything that was streched out. The changing in POV's was a little hard to understand who was doing the talking but not that hard once you got into it.

How I so enjoyed watching their relationship develop the way it did. The ending line gave me warm fuzzies, lol. Nice one.

[siren_mage]

Thank you kindly. I'm glad that you liked it and that you were able to get into the changing POV's. I know it was kind of . . . experimental and definitely something I'd only done once before, so I was nervous about it.

[kjsilopanna]

Wow, this was surprisingly good. High school AUs usually fall into the realm of bad!fic (though those fics have their own appropriate time and place, too), but this was well-constructed and it's obvious that a lot of work went into it. I loved the way you wrote Jen into the story, as well. She's so cool. Good job!

[siren_mage]

Thank you!!!! I'm really glad you liked the construction and teh Jen as well. :)

*phew*

[iamz]

Normally I can't stand this type of writing style, with first and second person but wow.... this was almost better than sex... almost

Re: *phew*

[siren_mage]

Oooooh, thank you very much. ;)