14. Dream Away the Place (Drabble 10)
Title: Dream Away the Place
Author: IJ's tweedygal
Drabble: #10 by testdog65
Notes: First, thank you to the unknown author of this lovely drabble...it's beautiful and I can't wait to find out who you are! Next, *huge* hugs and thank you to jule1122, you are the best beta ever. Anyone who can put up with my fretting over something so short deserves HIGH praise. Also, thanks to notreallyme and happier_bunny for all your help. You both rock. &hearts
The headlights projected a thin, sharp line into the rainy night. Justin turned to look out the passenger window, seeing nothing but inky blackness beyond the edge of the road.
The radio played quietly, a song that Justin didn't recognize. He glanced over at Brian, his profile hazy within the darkened interior of the car.
"Almost there." Brian's voice was low and rough, the perfect complement to the surrounding shadows. Justin shifted in his seat and almost smiled. When he looked down, he saw Brian's hand lying against his jeans, palm facing up. Justin reached over, letting their fingers intertwine.
Just getting out of the loft helped Justin begin to relax. The steady beat of the windshield wipers, combined with the soft melody of the song on the radio and the warmth of Brian's hand made it hard for Justin to stay awake. He drifted off.
Brian glanced over when he heard Justin’s even breathing, glad to see that he’d finally given in and fallen asleep. He held on to his hand for a few moments longer, then pulled away to rub his own tired eyes. It was the third night this week that they’d been out in the middle of the night, driving and driving, trying to lull Justin back to calmness after yet another nightmare.
Tonight, Justin had insisted that they go back to the parking garage, despite Brian’s protests. “I need to go, Brian,” Justin said. “Please. I’m so tired. I want these fucking nightmares to stop." His voice trailed off and he looked away, afraid to let Brian see how upset he was.
“What good will it do?” Brian’s voice was angry, frustrated. “You can’t remember anything. What makes you think going there tonight will change that?” Justin ran his hands through his hair, willing himself not to cry. He’d been on the verge of tears since he’d woken with Brian’s voice repeating “you’re ok” over and over as he pulled Justin to him.
“I don’t know.” When Justin finally answered, his voice was almost a whisper. “I just need to get out of here, and I want to go. Maybe something will be different tonight.”
Brian stared at Justin for a long time, finally nodding his head slightly.
Now, with Justin finally sleeping beside him, Brian was tempted to keep driving and let him rest. But he’d told Justin they’d go and having to deal with a tired and angry Justin the next day at Gus’s birthday party wasn’t going to help either of them. So he drove to the garage and parked the Jeep just inside.
When he killed the engine, Justin stirred just a bit, tucking a hand next to his cheek and turning slightly in his seat. He smiled just a little, apparently lost in a happy dream for a change. Brian reached a hand out to wake him, but stopped short and lightly touched his hair instead. He’d just let him sleep a while.
He got out of the car and walked around to lean against the bumper of the Jeep, watching the rain fall, trying not to remember that warm spring night or that radiant smile he hadn’t seen since. He tried not to remember the crack of the bat or the feel of blood pooling under his feet and under Justin’s head. And the harder he tried to forget, the more the memories flooded him. He scrubbed his face with his hands, wondering if he would ever forget.
*****************
“Brian?” Justin’s voice sounded a million miles away. Brian started, turning to see that Justin had opened the Jeep door. He looked so young, so vulnerable. Brian’s chest constricted. He smiled, though, and walked to him, pulling him into his arms, just as Justin got out. He caressed his hair, fingers running through the strands. The rain had steadily increased as Justin had slept and now it was pouring down, the wind whipping it into the garage. As Justin reached up to kiss Brian, lightning flashed and a crack of thunder boomed through the sky.
Justin jumped, then laughed into Brian’s mouth as they kissed. Brian laughed then too, pulled Justin even closer, hugging him hard. When the kiss finally ended, Justin reached up, touching Brian’s cheek, and looked at Brian intently. Brian could see the trust there and closed his eyes against it. Leaning his forehead against Justin’s, he sighed.
“Brian?” Justin said again. “I’m OK now. We don’t need to stay…”
“Are you sure?” Even as he asked, Brian knew it wasn’t true. Justin wasn’t OK -- neither of them were. But they had to keep moving, had to keep the pain from taking over, so he let Justin think he was in control.
“Yeah. Let’s just drive some more. Please?”
Just like he’d done earlier in the loft, Brian looked at him for a long time and finally nodded his head.
As they drove out into the storm, Justin fiddled with the radio dial. When he found something he liked, he sat back, his eyes closing. Brian reached for his hand, and they drove into the darkness again, the wipers still keeping their steady beat.
Author: IJ's tweedygal
Drabble: #10 by testdog65
Notes: First, thank you to the unknown author of this lovely drabble...it's beautiful and I can't wait to find out who you are! Next, *huge* hugs and thank you to jule1122, you are the best beta ever. Anyone who can put up with my fretting over something so short deserves HIGH praise. Also, thanks to notreallyme and happier_bunny for all your help. You both rock. &hearts
The headlights projected a thin, sharp line into the rainy night. Justin turned to look out the passenger window, seeing nothing but inky blackness beyond the edge of the road.
The radio played quietly, a song that Justin didn't recognize. He glanced over at Brian, his profile hazy within the darkened interior of the car.
"Almost there." Brian's voice was low and rough, the perfect complement to the surrounding shadows. Justin shifted in his seat and almost smiled. When he looked down, he saw Brian's hand lying against his jeans, palm facing up. Justin reached over, letting their fingers intertwine.
Just getting out of the loft helped Justin begin to relax. The steady beat of the windshield wipers, combined with the soft melody of the song on the radio and the warmth of Brian's hand made it hard for Justin to stay awake. He drifted off.
Brian glanced over when he heard Justin’s even breathing, glad to see that he’d finally given in and fallen asleep. He held on to his hand for a few moments longer, then pulled away to rub his own tired eyes. It was the third night this week that they’d been out in the middle of the night, driving and driving, trying to lull Justin back to calmness after yet another nightmare.
Tonight, Justin had insisted that they go back to the parking garage, despite Brian’s protests. “I need to go, Brian,” Justin said. “Please. I’m so tired. I want these fucking nightmares to stop." His voice trailed off and he looked away, afraid to let Brian see how upset he was.
“What good will it do?” Brian’s voice was angry, frustrated. “You can’t remember anything. What makes you think going there tonight will change that?” Justin ran his hands through his hair, willing himself not to cry. He’d been on the verge of tears since he’d woken with Brian’s voice repeating “you’re ok” over and over as he pulled Justin to him.
“I don’t know.” When Justin finally answered, his voice was almost a whisper. “I just need to get out of here, and I want to go. Maybe something will be different tonight.”
Brian stared at Justin for a long time, finally nodding his head slightly.
Now, with Justin finally sleeping beside him, Brian was tempted to keep driving and let him rest. But he’d told Justin they’d go and having to deal with a tired and angry Justin the next day at Gus’s birthday party wasn’t going to help either of them. So he drove to the garage and parked the Jeep just inside.
When he killed the engine, Justin stirred just a bit, tucking a hand next to his cheek and turning slightly in his seat. He smiled just a little, apparently lost in a happy dream for a change. Brian reached a hand out to wake him, but stopped short and lightly touched his hair instead. He’d just let him sleep a while.
He got out of the car and walked around to lean against the bumper of the Jeep, watching the rain fall, trying not to remember that warm spring night or that radiant smile he hadn’t seen since. He tried not to remember the crack of the bat or the feel of blood pooling under his feet and under Justin’s head. And the harder he tried to forget, the more the memories flooded him. He scrubbed his face with his hands, wondering if he would ever forget.
*****************
“Brian?” Justin’s voice sounded a million miles away. Brian started, turning to see that Justin had opened the Jeep door. He looked so young, so vulnerable. Brian’s chest constricted. He smiled, though, and walked to him, pulling him into his arms, just as Justin got out. He caressed his hair, fingers running through the strands. The rain had steadily increased as Justin had slept and now it was pouring down, the wind whipping it into the garage. As Justin reached up to kiss Brian, lightning flashed and a crack of thunder boomed through the sky.
Justin jumped, then laughed into Brian’s mouth as they kissed. Brian laughed then too, pulled Justin even closer, hugging him hard. When the kiss finally ended, Justin reached up, touching Brian’s cheek, and looked at Brian intently. Brian could see the trust there and closed his eyes against it. Leaning his forehead against Justin’s, he sighed.
“Brian?” Justin said again. “I’m OK now. We don’t need to stay…”
“Are you sure?” Even as he asked, Brian knew it wasn’t true. Justin wasn’t OK -- neither of them were. But they had to keep moving, had to keep the pain from taking over, so he let Justin think he was in control.
“Yeah. Let’s just drive some more. Please?”
Just like he’d done earlier in the loft, Brian looked at him for a long time and finally nodded his head.
As they drove out into the storm, Justin fiddled with the radio dial. When he found something he liked, he sat back, his eyes closing. Brian reached for his hand, and they drove into the darkness again, the wipers still keeping their steady beat.