If you remember me- 3
Title: If you remember me
Rating: NC 17
Warning: Smut, Mpreg, amnesia-fic and blatant harlequin-esque self indulgence by the author read at your risk!
Length: Chapter-ed
Summary: This is a story about Jae in Japan who has no memories of his past tying to fit into his 'new' life in Korea and Yunho with his three year old son, trying to find a way to keep Jae unlike the way he lost Jaejoong
Chapter 3
There was something about flights that he found unnerving, true that given the fact that he had suffered a plane crash should be sufficient reason to put off by them, he didn’t really remember the crash, thus his fear of flying seemed unfounded.
The first class seats were comfortable and the air hostess smiled charmingly at him as he fidgeted.
“you never did like flying” Yunho mused.
Jaejoong chose to glare at the other man instead, there was something about him that drew him in just as much as repulsed him. He couldn’t quite understand his conflicting emotions, the relative stranger was a handsome man, but yet.
“are you alright?”he asked again, Jaejoong nodded and popped in a few sleeping pills to ease the journey.
---
Yunho watched with the practised ease in which Jaejoong popped the pills.
The slow pull of the drugs as his eye lids got heavier, the way his blinks got slower, his long lashes splayed against the paleness of his cheeks. The soft parting of his lips unconsciously or how his jaw unclenched from the tightness he had around Yunho.
Jae- this newer version of Jaejoong disliked him, the skinny boy with bleached blonde hair couldn’t look at Yunho without grimacing, almost like a reflex.
Jaejoong had been a non entity in Yunho’s world growing up, his mother’s best friend had a pretty son. It wasn’t till he was 15 that Yunho started paying attention to Jaejoong, in retrospect he realised how fucked up that was.
Jaejoong had been innocent then, wide eyed, sheltered and vulnerable and Yunho had been the older one. There were moments when he watched Jaejoong’s lips, the way he licked his lips, the way his throat convulsed after a sip of drink and wondered what it would feel beneath his tongue. That he had taken Jaejoong’s love confession like a parched man in a desert, consumed him in every possible way then.
Jaejoong shifted slightly beside him, his head against the window of the plane, the position looked uncomfortable. He reached over to tilt the younger man’s head into a more comfortable position, Jaejoong shifted away, clearly disturbed in his sleep.
It surprised Yunho that even in his sleep Jaejoong didn’t want to be touched by him.
---
Jaejoong was alarmed to see the size of the gate, by the cut of Yunho’s suit it was easy to deduce that the man was wealthy. But rolling into the sprawling mansion with imposing gates made Jae realize how rich the man actually was.
The house was affluent, with huge wooden doors and ceiling that Jae had to crane to see, yet he felt oddly comfortable in the house. An odd sense of familiarity as if he had spent an alarmingly large time in the following house.
There were people in the hallway waiting for him, an odd assortment of well dressed men and women none of whom he recognised. He was taking steps towards them, almost subconsciously till he stopped in front of the beautiful woman with the sleeping child, his fingers brushing against the child’s cheek.
He took a step back as he realized what he had been doing unable to explain his need to pick soomebody’s child up.
“I am sorry” he said scratching the back of his neck.
The woman holding the child was beautiful, doe eyed and slender she looked something out of a fashion magazine. She was wearing a simple peach colored dress that seemed to enhance the youth of her face, the child slept peacefully curled against her shoulder.
It was the child that he couldn’t take his eyes off, in the tiny grey cotton shirt and soft black hair that fell across his forehead, or his small lips curved into an unconscious pout, he just wanted to hold his tiny body against him and be secure in the knowledge of his beating heart.
“This is Moonbin” the woman’s soft voice broke through his revere, the rest of the group standing in some kind of shocked silence that they were unable to shake off.
“he is...”
“My child” it was Yunho’s voice that broke through, suddenly snapping everyone’s attention. Even though Jae didn’t know it he could feel a definite change in everyone’s atmosphere.
That is when Jae noticed the rather enormous wedding ring settle comfortably against her ring finger “Oh” he said mostly to himself.
“you were very attached to him” the woman said softly breaking Jae’s thoughts as if to explain his strange reaction to somebody else’s child.
“I am Yoona” she said smiling a bit wider this time, “am Moonbin’s godmother”
Jaejoong couldn’t explain the palatable relief that flooded his system, secure in the knowledge that Yunho wasn’t with the woman after all. He immediately resented the line of his thoughts, instead turning his attention to the other inhabitants in the room.
There was a handsome man next to Yoona who smiled immediately as his glance fell over “Jae ah” there was unmistakable affection in his tone “I am Yoochun” he took a step forward as if to pull him into a hug but stopped himself at the last moment.
The blonde haired man turned out to be Junsu, there was something happy in his aura that immediately relaxed him. Even though it wasn’t talked about, it was clear that these people were his friends rather than Yunho’s at the way they distanced themselves.
There was an older woman who embraced him almost immediately as he turned his attention towards her. Against her shoulder, smelling the apple blossom in her perfume Jaejoong felt a strange sense of belonging.
“I am Seo young” she said “I am Yunho’s mother”
The realisation seemed strange to Jaejoong, that he was comfortable with Yunho’s mother, wanted to hold Yunho’s child, felt safe at Yunho’s home, his heart raced in Yunho’s presence.
He may have just been a P.A to Yunho before his accident, but Jaejoong could realize that his feelings towards the other man weren’t purely platonic.
“I am feeling tired” Jaejoong said, to the eager faces that surrounded him, they looked at him as if he was expected to say something dramatic. But all he could feel was a pounding headache, like something was clawing through his head.
Yunho jumped up as if it was his cue “I will take you to the bedroom”
Jaejoong nodded at the other man, not really eager to walk through the sprawling seemingly empty corridors with the other man.
The walk was silent and maybe even awkward, but all Jaejoong wanted to do was to find a bed so that he could sleep off his head ache.
The room was huge, with a king size bed and huge French windows, yet he couldn’t quiet feel comfortable there.
“Is this my room?” he couldn’t stop doubt from colouring his voice, Yunho froze abruptly at the question shook his head.
“your original room is cleaned out” there was a stiffness to his answer, at any other juncture Jaejoong would have suspected the other man of lying but he was too exhausted to protest.
“Ok” he said instead, “I am going to sleep”
Yunho took an abortive step towards him, uncertainty etched on his face. Jaejoong was surprised to feel the soft pressure on the side of his face as Yunho touched his face.
“sleep well” his voice choked with an emotion Jaejoong could not understand.
Sleep found Jaejoong alarmingly easily, its long tendrils dragging him back to a sleep plagued with nonsensical dreams.
There were ones with him in Japan, learning how to ride a bike, how annoying and hard it was for him to master it’s balance.
“I don’t think you knew how to ride a bicycle” Kieta had pointed out, he did however painstakingly help Jaejoong master the bike.
The dream changed into something that Jaejoong couldn’t recall, he was standing in front of Yunho, a much younger one dressed in Jeans and a tee with his duffel bag on his shoulders.
“How long will you be gone?” Jaejoong could hear how pitiful his voice sounded, an
almost desperate grip over it not breaking.
Yunho looked distracted rather “I don’t know” he said instead “you know how father is”
Jaejoong nodded “you will keep in touch right?” his voice sounded smaller, farther away and Yunho’s answering grin a lingering memory as he opened his eyes.
That was his first memory from his past, he was surprised at the intensity with which he was hit, how young he sounded in his dreams.
He hardly looked old as 15, thus answering is question of his feeling towards Yunho. In the back of his mind he could still see the pathetic boy, trying hard not to cry or let go of his grip of Yunho’s shirt sleeves. He felt embarrassed of his younger self as he roused himself from the last dredges of sleep and found his way downstairs.
Yunho was seated on the dining table, looked up and smiled and Jaejoong swallowed the unexplained lump in his throat.
Rating: NC 17
Warning: Smut, Mpreg, amnesia-fic and blatant harlequin-esque self indulgence by the author read at your risk!
Length: Chapter-ed
Summary: This is a story about Jae in Japan who has no memories of his past tying to fit into his 'new' life in Korea and Yunho with his three year old son, trying to find a way to keep Jae unlike the way he lost Jaejoong
Chapter 3
There was something about flights that he found unnerving, true that given the fact that he had suffered a plane crash should be sufficient reason to put off by them, he didn’t really remember the crash, thus his fear of flying seemed unfounded.
The first class seats were comfortable and the air hostess smiled charmingly at him as he fidgeted.
“you never did like flying” Yunho mused.
Jaejoong chose to glare at the other man instead, there was something about him that drew him in just as much as repulsed him. He couldn’t quite understand his conflicting emotions, the relative stranger was a handsome man, but yet.
“are you alright?”he asked again, Jaejoong nodded and popped in a few sleeping pills to ease the journey.
---
Yunho watched with the practised ease in which Jaejoong popped the pills.
The slow pull of the drugs as his eye lids got heavier, the way his blinks got slower, his long lashes splayed against the paleness of his cheeks. The soft parting of his lips unconsciously or how his jaw unclenched from the tightness he had around Yunho.
Jae- this newer version of Jaejoong disliked him, the skinny boy with bleached blonde hair couldn’t look at Yunho without grimacing, almost like a reflex.
Jaejoong had been a non entity in Yunho’s world growing up, his mother’s best friend had a pretty son. It wasn’t till he was 15 that Yunho started paying attention to Jaejoong, in retrospect he realised how fucked up that was.
Jaejoong had been innocent then, wide eyed, sheltered and vulnerable and Yunho had been the older one. There were moments when he watched Jaejoong’s lips, the way he licked his lips, the way his throat convulsed after a sip of drink and wondered what it would feel beneath his tongue. That he had taken Jaejoong’s love confession like a parched man in a desert, consumed him in every possible way then.
Jaejoong shifted slightly beside him, his head against the window of the plane, the position looked uncomfortable. He reached over to tilt the younger man’s head into a more comfortable position, Jaejoong shifted away, clearly disturbed in his sleep.
It surprised Yunho that even in his sleep Jaejoong didn’t want to be touched by him.
---
Jaejoong was alarmed to see the size of the gate, by the cut of Yunho’s suit it was easy to deduce that the man was wealthy. But rolling into the sprawling mansion with imposing gates made Jae realize how rich the man actually was.
The house was affluent, with huge wooden doors and ceiling that Jae had to crane to see, yet he felt oddly comfortable in the house. An odd sense of familiarity as if he had spent an alarmingly large time in the following house.
There were people in the hallway waiting for him, an odd assortment of well dressed men and women none of whom he recognised. He was taking steps towards them, almost subconsciously till he stopped in front of the beautiful woman with the sleeping child, his fingers brushing against the child’s cheek.
He took a step back as he realized what he had been doing unable to explain his need to pick soomebody’s child up.
“I am sorry” he said scratching the back of his neck.
The woman holding the child was beautiful, doe eyed and slender she looked something out of a fashion magazine. She was wearing a simple peach colored dress that seemed to enhance the youth of her face, the child slept peacefully curled against her shoulder.
It was the child that he couldn’t take his eyes off, in the tiny grey cotton shirt and soft black hair that fell across his forehead, or his small lips curved into an unconscious pout, he just wanted to hold his tiny body against him and be secure in the knowledge of his beating heart.
“This is Moonbin” the woman’s soft voice broke through his revere, the rest of the group standing in some kind of shocked silence that they were unable to shake off.
“he is...”
“My child” it was Yunho’s voice that broke through, suddenly snapping everyone’s attention. Even though Jae didn’t know it he could feel a definite change in everyone’s atmosphere.
That is when Jae noticed the rather enormous wedding ring settle comfortably against her ring finger “Oh” he said mostly to himself.
“you were very attached to him” the woman said softly breaking Jae’s thoughts as if to explain his strange reaction to somebody else’s child.
“I am Yoona” she said smiling a bit wider this time, “am Moonbin’s godmother”
Jaejoong couldn’t explain the palatable relief that flooded his system, secure in the knowledge that Yunho wasn’t with the woman after all. He immediately resented the line of his thoughts, instead turning his attention to the other inhabitants in the room.
There was a handsome man next to Yoona who smiled immediately as his glance fell over “Jae ah” there was unmistakable affection in his tone “I am Yoochun” he took a step forward as if to pull him into a hug but stopped himself at the last moment.
The blonde haired man turned out to be Junsu, there was something happy in his aura that immediately relaxed him. Even though it wasn’t talked about, it was clear that these people were his friends rather than Yunho’s at the way they distanced themselves.
There was an older woman who embraced him almost immediately as he turned his attention towards her. Against her shoulder, smelling the apple blossom in her perfume Jaejoong felt a strange sense of belonging.
“I am Seo young” she said “I am Yunho’s mother”
The realisation seemed strange to Jaejoong, that he was comfortable with Yunho’s mother, wanted to hold Yunho’s child, felt safe at Yunho’s home, his heart raced in Yunho’s presence.
He may have just been a P.A to Yunho before his accident, but Jaejoong could realize that his feelings towards the other man weren’t purely platonic.
“I am feeling tired” Jaejoong said, to the eager faces that surrounded him, they looked at him as if he was expected to say something dramatic. But all he could feel was a pounding headache, like something was clawing through his head.
Yunho jumped up as if it was his cue “I will take you to the bedroom”
Jaejoong nodded at the other man, not really eager to walk through the sprawling seemingly empty corridors with the other man.
The walk was silent and maybe even awkward, but all Jaejoong wanted to do was to find a bed so that he could sleep off his head ache.
The room was huge, with a king size bed and huge French windows, yet he couldn’t quiet feel comfortable there.
“Is this my room?” he couldn’t stop doubt from colouring his voice, Yunho froze abruptly at the question shook his head.
“your original room is cleaned out” there was a stiffness to his answer, at any other juncture Jaejoong would have suspected the other man of lying but he was too exhausted to protest.
“Ok” he said instead, “I am going to sleep”
Yunho took an abortive step towards him, uncertainty etched on his face. Jaejoong was surprised to feel the soft pressure on the side of his face as Yunho touched his face.
“sleep well” his voice choked with an emotion Jaejoong could not understand.
Sleep found Jaejoong alarmingly easily, its long tendrils dragging him back to a sleep plagued with nonsensical dreams.
There were ones with him in Japan, learning how to ride a bike, how annoying and hard it was for him to master it’s balance.
“I don’t think you knew how to ride a bicycle” Kieta had pointed out, he did however painstakingly help Jaejoong master the bike.
The dream changed into something that Jaejoong couldn’t recall, he was standing in front of Yunho, a much younger one dressed in Jeans and a tee with his duffel bag on his shoulders.
“How long will you be gone?” Jaejoong could hear how pitiful his voice sounded, an
almost desperate grip over it not breaking.
Yunho looked distracted rather “I don’t know” he said instead “you know how father is”
Jaejoong nodded “you will keep in touch right?” his voice sounded smaller, farther away and Yunho’s answering grin a lingering memory as he opened his eyes.
That was his first memory from his past, he was surprised at the intensity with which he was hit, how young he sounded in his dreams.
He hardly looked old as 15, thus answering is question of his feeling towards Yunho. In the back of his mind he could still see the pathetic boy, trying hard not to cry or let go of his grip of Yunho’s shirt sleeves. He felt embarrassed of his younger self as he roused himself from the last dredges of sleep and found his way downstairs.
Yunho was seated on the dining table, looked up and smiled and Jaejoong swallowed the unexplained lump in his throat.