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[queenofprinnies]

I think its time to confide a deep-seated pang that has been making me wriggle with anxiety for the longest time. I have not felt comfortable with playing Etna at camp for a very long time... and lord knows I've been struggling with keeping her or not for a long time. As more time has passed, RPing with her just hasn't been very comfortable or

Comments

[harukami]

I have to run to work, so I don't have time for a long or full comment, but: chin up. I think many of us have had those characters or those moments where we get low post comments or brief threads only (for me, it was Lexaeus -- the reason being, there, that I tended to hop posts infrequently, so he didn't make acquaintances, so when I posted there weren't many people who knew him who jumped, etc). Obviously, I don't know your full play habits, but if it's anything like that, it might help you to try to put your nerves aside and just jump a whole spate of posts and get to know new people, because that's where a lot of the IC motivation to jump posts comes from for OTHER people -- a lot of times, it's easier or more IC in post circumstances (a stranger announcing something weird vs a friend announcing something weird) to jump someone you know rather than someone you don't

[queenofprinnies]

...actually, the advice to post to many threads make a lot of sense (and is one of those things that's like 'why didn't I realize that sooner?') Perhaps I should try to throw Etna more out there and see what happens.

Ah... the anonymous thing is a feeling of separateness from the group as a hole. Actually I was also really tired at the time so maybe posting it up was actually not the best of ideas. I've always sort of had a personal issue of not being a part of most communities I try to be a part of (growing up not being able to speak the native language might do that ^^;). So when I see people talk freely and happily with each other in IRC there are some times when I get so downcast that I'm not a part of that... while still being afraid to put myself out there because of some bad past experiences

[queenofprinnies]

The trouble I have with Etna is she is extremely caustic... and its sort of hard for me to play with her when most everybody else tries to shy away or avoid them entirely. The end result of this are interactions where Etna continuously antagonizes another, that person gets annoyed, and then they leave. If I play her right, she sort of alienates people with her incredibly observant, caustic and sharp-witted personality (and even that ignores when she decides to do something spontaneously). Eventually I'm sort of left with a character who has pushed or scared off characters and she's left with herself. I guess at this point I'm not sure if that's for IC or OOC reasons... and that may be where it starts to effect how I play her.

I'm also grappling with not only my presentation of Etna but how I RP in general. When I read through threads there seems to be a lot more fluidity in how the conversation flows. So I guess there's both IC and OOC things to consider.

[queenofprinnies]

Yeah. I'm starting to see that there's both IC and OOC things to consider here. And part of being able to play with her is knowing how to play. Even though I'm coming up on the end of two years now, there's still a lot to LiveJournal RPing that I haven't learned. You've helped point out some of this, which will be helpful in the future.

Ah, don't worry about it. I think I'm just venting out some other concerns and wibbles. |D

[pas_de_duck]

I think you know that I've enjoyed playing with Etna with multiple characters. I can't speak for you ICness because I don't know the canon... but my best advice would be to stop worrying and just play her as you actually see her. To use the example of my own characters... if Etna alienates Ahiru, she'll always be able to mock Mihashi instead. There is a place for any type of character.

(and it's pretty hard to alienate Ahiru, anyway.)

[queenofprinnies]

I guess the real question here is, "How do I know if how I see and play her is right?"

(Jesuses are Etna's weakness, but she'd try anyway!)