(Untitled)

[queeny479]

Soooo random, but I found a piece of this so interesting that I wanted to save it somewhere. I'm providing the context as well, for anyone curious, but bolding my favorite bit

Comments

[jagruti]

Okay, so, here's what I don't get: I'm close friends with mostly women, and a lot of them. They are diverse, and most of them are very smart. Not a single one (as far as I know) actually goes for the bad boy/asshole type in real life. I can intellectually understand the attractiveness of a bad boy, but not in a "I want to save him" sense of it, but rather a holdover of adolescent "fuck the world"-ness. And in real life, this kind of person either bores or mildly repulses me. SO WHERE THE HELL DOES THIS COMPLAINT FROM "NICE GUYS" COME FROM?

The quote you've posted is interesting, but I find myself utterly confused about the premise.

[queeny479]

I mean, it's a premise that's out there, though I'd agree with you and say that there doesn't seem to be much evidence for it (though I would argue that in our context, emo-ness was sometimes glamorized, and in its own way that's somewhat rebellious/anti-something). Then again, I stand by my belief that a large percentage of the male population doesn't know about all of the girls in the world who are competent, nerdy, don't particularly know how to flirt, and don't have extremely unreasonable expectations of guys they date. So maybe these nice guys who have this complaint are somewhere where all of the girls we know don't exist...? Haha, no real clue.

The more logical answer is that people never like to see themselves as the problem, particularly when it comes to dating, so a bunch of guys have made up the entire phenomena as a way to console themselves for being dumped. I mostly just like the idea of repeating bad relationship habits as being a way your brain forces you to cope.