Fandom: Heroes
Title: Life Giver
Author: Paynesgrey
Rating: R
Genre: Angst/Drama
Characters/Pairings: Meredith, Claire, Meredith/Nathan
Word Count: 1,009
Spoilers: end of Volume 3
Warnings: sexual situations
Notes: Written for the "Create" theme at
heroes_contest Summary: Meredith realizes she not only gives life but also destroys it.
She lay on her back against the hood of her father's car and stares at her fingers. They become hot; her eyes widen as a flicker dances over her finger tips. She smiles, always incredulous, watching with fascination as the flame grows. She studies the designs it paints as the flames swirl around in her grasp. She shoots the fire out into the sky and watches as it wanes into the cold air, finally disappearing.
She giggles and creates another flame - with a different shape, and she begins to exercise her control. She feels empowered being unique and able to create fire like this. She thinks about the historic age where fire is first discovered. She wonders how they must have felt, how they would have reacted to her if she lived back then. Would they think her a god or the devil? With fire she creates heat, creates life, and yet how many humans say the can do such a thing?
Proudly, she plays with the flames - small like a flicker, huge like a brush fire, thin like a sunbeam, or thick like a campfire. Through the orange and red flames she sees the sky behind a veneer of heat and she shudders.
Once her fear kicks in, the flame dispels. Meredith shrugs her shoulders and flicks the spark again, each time more controlled then the next.
She'll definitely get the hang of this. Easily.
--
Later, Meredith Gordon meets Nathan Petrelli. He's handsome and rich and charismatic, and he looks at her and touches her like she's the only woman in the world for him. His voice is soft like a summer breeze, and when he kisses her, he whispers in her ear on how beautiful she is. They both come from different social circles, but he never mentions it and never degrades her because of it. He lights her body aflame - and she can appreciate it.
She does everything to him and for him. She teases, she tempts, and she trails her tongue in the soft grooves of his body.
He draws her into his lap, and she smells alcohol and male, and he says the right words again and puts his hands in the right spots. He lights her on fire, and sparks prick at her fingers as he plunges deep inside her.
She cries his name when she feels his warmth pool within her. Her womb buzzes with smoldering energy, and he sighs against her ear, content.
Meredith realizes then that you can create life in other ways too.
--
When the fire can create, it can also destroy. She has the baby by herself. Nathan is gone and does not want her around. She's insulted at one point; he actually offers to give her a check to get rid of it. Like it's that easy, she says to herself with a snort.
Instead, she has the baby. Beautiful, sweet Claire, and they can live happily ever after too - as long as she doesn't draw attention to herself. As long as she can convince herself every day that she can be a good mother on her own. Without help, without Nathan to tell her how strong and beautiful she is,because he doesn't do that anymore. He cuts her dry, and she cries along with Claire at night, unable to soothe her as they both wail in pain.
But their semi-home doesn't last long, and They come and storm her house, and she can't handle it anymore. The hiding, the posturing. She can't handle being a mother. She's never thought she'd be one - let alone be a good one.
They disrupt everything, and Meredith can't control herself. She's been so good before, but her house explodes and there's nothing she can do. She walks away unscathed, but her baby... Her precious baby is gone.
Meredith knows she's done a bad thing. She wonders if Claire is somehow spared from her wretchedness. She slips away, glad they think she's dead and she travels south of the border, in an alien world where no one knows her. Where no one can find her.
She has enough trouble with her memories following her - memories of the life she's created and easily destroys.
--
She's heard of the phoenix, a mythical bird that rises from the ashes, and that's how special her Claire is. She's invincible, and the day they reunite is a happy day, but it is also a day filled with fear.
If Claire's found her, she knows They can too.
So she gives the girl what she came for, maybe more than Meredith wants to, and she leaves again. She hopes Claire can understand someday.
Claire already has a good mother, but it's not her. It can never be her. She can't do anything good anymore. Meredith believes she can only destroy.
---
Her body's filled with adrenaline, but not of her own accord, and as sweat covers her in wet sheets, Meredith sees her pathetic life flash before her eyes. Not much good has come of it, and the only thing she's proud of is Claire. It's not her doing that Claire is the remarkable young woman she's proven herself to be. She can thank the Bennets for that.
Meredith knows she doesn't have much time. The building is scalding; the foundation and structure are melting around her as she breathes.
Claire comes back for her, and it makes her proud. But it's too late, and it's enough that Claire loves her this much.
Meredith finds some consolation in her death. She is the destroyer but she's also the life giver - she sees that in Claire. And though she's never taken a part in raising her, Meredith is grateful she's created one positive thing in her life.
Not just Claire herself, but Meredith finally takes pride in her genes. She smiles and realizes she can move on now, peacefully, knowing that a part of her is with Claire, and will always protect her from any harm.
THE END