They did it where???
There are times when the mood strikes and a bed is no where to be found. Our favorite couple has had intimate relations in all sorts of fun places, outside a bar, in a prision cell, on the train and underwater to name just a few. This quiz is definitely for adults only, please go away if you are under age.
Match the story to the quote:
Not a Word by notsosaintly
In The Most Delightful Way by Vocalion
An Unconventional Moment by Celisnebula
Its Never That Simple by missile-envy
Aboard the Hogwarts Express by redorchids
And So It Comes to This by odogoddess
Stampede by ayerf
Honeysuckle Magic by lulabelle72
Standard Operating Procedures by eeyore9990
Drowning by plaidpooka
Taking Shelter by lulabelle72
Checkout by alliean
1. "I'm sure gentlemanly went out the window when the desk came into play."
"Still, isn't it only proper to stay for breakfast?"
Snape snorted. "You have quite obviously never had a one-night stand before."
"No," she admitted. Then she turned to look at him. "What, you have?" He shot her a look, and Hermione couldn't help but feel a bit peeved at that thought. Not just that Snape's sex life had apparently been far more exciting than her own, but that...hang on a second. "So that's all I am, then? A one-night stand?"
He seemed surprised at the idea that she might find that idea just a trifle insulting. "What else did you have in mind?"
"Well, I don't know," she grumbled testily. "It's not as if we couldn't do it again."
"I wouldn't recommend it at the moment," he said, with a meaningful glance at his leg.
2. Suddenly he picked her up and set her on the windowsill, the luminescence of the moon creating a halo about her head. He pushed her knees apart, hitched her knickers in the crooks of his thumbs and yanked them off in one swift motion, letting them flutter to the floor forgotten.
Stepping back slightly, he let his pants drop to his ankles, watching her reaction as she gazed longingly at his generous girth. She spread her legs wider in anticipation, exposing her exquisitely engorged folds. Her body yearned to have him deep inside.
He closed the distance and let the point of his stiffness rest at her opening, relishing in the anticipation of the ultimate consummation. Unable to withstand such idleness, she grabbed his buttocks and forced him to penetrate her. That one simple act nearly destroyed his composure.
3. The cake had not burned in the end, but had overcooked enough to be caramelised slightly, and had then been turned into a delicious, gooey mess in a bowl once some chocolate icing was added to the broken apart pieces of sponge. From a tub. Hermione had rather run out of energy for baking. They had been lying in yet another mess of limbs for almost three hours now, watching her DVDs and eating the chocolate cake with their fingers. And helping each other clean the chocolate off.
“So, tomorrow...” began Hermione uncertainly.
“Tomorrow...” prompted Severus, smirking into her hair.
“No, you’re supposed to follow on from that,” she complained, reaching backwards from her place between his legs to slap him on top of the head.
“Alright, though it is unwise to trust the coming events with a Slytherin, you know.”
“Well, it is your birthday, I suppose. You can do what you like. Put me out of my misery, please, Severus. I thought we were going to bypass the awkwardness thing.”
“Alright. Alright, tomorrow... tomorrow, we will still be on this couch or in your bed, sleeping off the effects of too much sex, if there is such a thing.
4. The mood had been destroyed. He glowered, rubbing a hand exasperatedly over his face. The fates were conspiring against him. As usual.
A small hand grabbed his upper arm, stopping him in mid-face rub. Another hand grabbed his other arm. He looked down at Hermione, whose face revealed a delicious truth: the mood had not, in fact, been completely destroyed.
She barely gave him enough time to register this before pushing him against the wall, both hands releasing his arms long enough to raise up, snaking into the hair at the back of his head and pulling him roughly down. Oh, it was going to be like that, was it? He met her lips with a ferociousness that matched hers. Tenderness be damned; he wanted that tongue in his mouth.
Several frantic minutes later, she broke from him with a pant. "How long do you think we've got before the next bus?"
"Twenty minutes? An hour?" he panted back.
"Let's pretend it's ten, shall we?"
5. We really can't do this," she breathed, "There are people everywhere." He removed a lock of curly hair from her face and then let his fingers trace the skin downwards, descending in teasing spirals until they found the underside of her left breast. She closed her eyes, leaning her forehead against his, trying to remain in control.
"You're right," he murmured, moving his head to kiss her neck, "there are people everywhere." The brief relief mixed with disappointment she'd felt at his first couple of words quickly vanished as the implications of the latter part of the sentence hit her.
"Anyone could walk in. The lock's not even magical," she protested, trying to ignore the tingling sensation that was spreading from his hands down throughout her body.
"They could," he conceded, and the way he said it made her shiver.
6. "Severus?" Hermione asked, stroking her hand over the stubble on his cheek, her head pillowed on his chest.
"Hmm?"
"You planned this, didn't you? You knew perfectly well that as a virgin murderess, that I'd need saving from the unicorns."
He chuckled. "As you knew, too, O knickerless one. I knew you were too impatient to wait until tonight."
"You've got me there. Still, I didn't quite picture losing my virginity upside down in a tree."
Severus snorted. "Technically it was while falling out of a tree."
7. Every single time Hermione returned to Hogwarts from such an encounter, she swore she would never go back, never face such humiliation again, never again allow herself to be so used. Then the week would creep itself toward the following Wednesday--their set meeting day--and, as the day approached, Hermione's resolve would crumble in the face of her raw need for release.
Despite knowing in her heart that what they did was wrong, even Hermione had to admit that she needed release as much as he did. Yes, it was wrong! It was cheep and tawdry; an animalistic rutting between two people who could scarcely speak civilly to each other in the reality of day. The whole situation drove her to distraction even as it kept her sane.
Sanity was a relative term, Hermione had decided. If her friends knew exactly how she spent her Wednesday evenings, they would certainly call her mad. Yet what could be called sane in this war-ravaged world? The campaign against Voldemort and his followers had reached a fever pitch. This was supposed to be her final year in school; Hermione wasn't sure what would happen to her education if the war ever ended. There were no classes at Hogwarts now. The castle and its grounds were a fortress of safety in a war-torn land. Students, professors, their families, and the inhabitants of Hogsmeade now resided within the wards.
8. It's difficult but not impossible. You've seen me. I'd like to know you, before--"
"Yes."
She waited and when he said nothing else, she realised he had given her his answer.
Without a word, she began to remove her robes, laying them atop the stool. Her shoes were simple slip-on affairs, and she did not wear hose so there was nothing to fuss with. When she pulled off her soft linen blouse, she looked back to him, and he sat as if entranced, gazing hungrily at her. He looked so hard she wondered if they'd manage to successfully complete their assignation.
Soon, she was bare before him, and he drew in a shuddering breath, releasing it in a whisper of sound.
"Hermione..."
She moved toward him, pausing just before his knees.
"Are you close?"
He swallowed again and nodded tightly.
"Good. We've only one minute."
That said, she glanced at her timepiece and straddled his lap. Then without preamble, Hermione grasped his hardness and slid onto it, letting it pierce her deeply.
She gasped even as he did and began to kiss him heatedly.
To her surprise he was clumsy at that, even as his lower half moved in smooth, sinuous strokes.
Has he never kissed anyone?
But the question was unimportant as she showed him, rode him, and abruptly felt herself stuttering toward climax.
She pulled free of his lips to cry out, and she felt the warm tickle of his trickling seed in the same instant, felt his rigidity and saw how his mouth had fallen open and his eyes had rolled back.
Pushing down one more time, grinding down hard, she shuddered through her climax and fought to catch her breath. She glanced at her timepiece and drew back regretfully. There were eight seconds left.
9. When the last spasm subsided, he pulled away from her and tucked his limp cock back inside his jeans. She turned to face him, shock and pleading in her tawny eyes.
"Miss Granger, I believe you got what you came for?" He dragged the pack of cigarettes from his back pocket and took one out. He lit it without matches or lighter, and puffed while watching her. Her face was flushed, and she shook ever so slightly.
"Professor, please." She reached for his free hand and placed it on her slick cunt. He allowed her to use his hand, to rub it against herself, as she panted and moaned herself, finally, to orgasm. He stared at her white knickers as she did so, at his come seeping down between her thighs towards them. He knew he'd be thinking about that for a while.
As she pulled up her knickers and smoothed her dress down, she asked what would happen now.
"Happen now, Miss Granger? I go back to my seat and have another drink. You go back to whatever life you have and forget you came here." He started to walk away.
"But Professor, what if I... what if..."
"What if you want to check up on me again? See if I'm all right?" He sneered. "You know where I am."
10. Hermione turned to face the lift doors before rolling her eyes at him. Not willing to give him the last word on the subject, she muttered, "If I had let this lift pass, we would have waited even longer for another lift-which would have been just as full, mind you-and I would have had to eventually do the same thing. It's protocol. I simply saved time."
"So your contention, then, is that you do not abuse your authority. Is that the case?"
Hermione stayed facing forward, refusing to show him by so much as the merest twitch of her body how personally affronted she was by his implication. Neither did she give him the satisfaction of a reply. Concentrating heavily on keeping her breathing and anger in check, she was startled to feel him press his body against hers, his nose burrowing in her hair as he whispered, "Because I distinctly recall weeks trapped in a house with you wherein you used your authority to tease and taunt me mercilessly."
Pressed against the lift doors, Hermione could do nothing but press her hands to it as she turned her head to the side. His lips glanced across her jaw as she did so and heat began to build low in her body as she recalled the last time they'd been this close. "I didn't tease you," she denied, her voice low and firm. "You knew how we were to act, and you agreed to it."
"Was it?"
"Was it what?"
"An act?"
Hermione was silent long enough to frustrate him, apparently, because moments later he took the fleshy part of her earlobe between his teeth, worrying it gently as he pressed his groin against her arse.
Match the story to the quote:
Not a Word by notsosaintly
In The Most Delightful Way by Vocalion
An Unconventional Moment by Celisnebula
Its Never That Simple by missile-envy
Aboard the Hogwarts Express by redorchids
And So It Comes to This by odogoddess
Stampede by ayerf
Honeysuckle Magic by lulabelle72
Standard Operating Procedures by eeyore9990
Drowning by plaidpooka
Taking Shelter by lulabelle72
Checkout by alliean
1. "I'm sure gentlemanly went out the window when the desk came into play."
"Still, isn't it only proper to stay for breakfast?"
Snape snorted. "You have quite obviously never had a one-night stand before."
"No," she admitted. Then she turned to look at him. "What, you have?" He shot her a look, and Hermione couldn't help but feel a bit peeved at that thought. Not just that Snape's sex life had apparently been far more exciting than her own, but that...hang on a second. "So that's all I am, then? A one-night stand?"
He seemed surprised at the idea that she might find that idea just a trifle insulting. "What else did you have in mind?"
"Well, I don't know," she grumbled testily. "It's not as if we couldn't do it again."
"I wouldn't recommend it at the moment," he said, with a meaningful glance at his leg.
2. Suddenly he picked her up and set her on the windowsill, the luminescence of the moon creating a halo about her head. He pushed her knees apart, hitched her knickers in the crooks of his thumbs and yanked them off in one swift motion, letting them flutter to the floor forgotten.
Stepping back slightly, he let his pants drop to his ankles, watching her reaction as she gazed longingly at his generous girth. She spread her legs wider in anticipation, exposing her exquisitely engorged folds. Her body yearned to have him deep inside.
He closed the distance and let the point of his stiffness rest at her opening, relishing in the anticipation of the ultimate consummation. Unable to withstand such idleness, she grabbed his buttocks and forced him to penetrate her. That one simple act nearly destroyed his composure.
3. The cake had not burned in the end, but had overcooked enough to be caramelised slightly, and had then been turned into a delicious, gooey mess in a bowl once some chocolate icing was added to the broken apart pieces of sponge. From a tub. Hermione had rather run out of energy for baking. They had been lying in yet another mess of limbs for almost three hours now, watching her DVDs and eating the chocolate cake with their fingers. And helping each other clean the chocolate off.
“So, tomorrow...” began Hermione uncertainly.
“Tomorrow...” prompted Severus, smirking into her hair.
“No, you’re supposed to follow on from that,” she complained, reaching backwards from her place between his legs to slap him on top of the head.
“Alright, though it is unwise to trust the coming events with a Slytherin, you know.”
“Well, it is your birthday, I suppose. You can do what you like. Put me out of my misery, please, Severus. I thought we were going to bypass the awkwardness thing.”
“Alright. Alright, tomorrow... tomorrow, we will still be on this couch or in your bed, sleeping off the effects of too much sex, if there is such a thing.
4. The mood had been destroyed. He glowered, rubbing a hand exasperatedly over his face. The fates were conspiring against him. As usual.
A small hand grabbed his upper arm, stopping him in mid-face rub. Another hand grabbed his other arm. He looked down at Hermione, whose face revealed a delicious truth: the mood had not, in fact, been completely destroyed.
She barely gave him enough time to register this before pushing him against the wall, both hands releasing his arms long enough to raise up, snaking into the hair at the back of his head and pulling him roughly down. Oh, it was going to be like that, was it? He met her lips with a ferociousness that matched hers. Tenderness be damned; he wanted that tongue in his mouth.
Several frantic minutes later, she broke from him with a pant. "How long do you think we've got before the next bus?"
"Twenty minutes? An hour?" he panted back.
"Let's pretend it's ten, shall we?"
5. We really can't do this," she breathed, "There are people everywhere." He removed a lock of curly hair from her face and then let his fingers trace the skin downwards, descending in teasing spirals until they found the underside of her left breast. She closed her eyes, leaning her forehead against his, trying to remain in control.
"You're right," he murmured, moving his head to kiss her neck, "there are people everywhere." The brief relief mixed with disappointment she'd felt at his first couple of words quickly vanished as the implications of the latter part of the sentence hit her.
"Anyone could walk in. The lock's not even magical," she protested, trying to ignore the tingling sensation that was spreading from his hands down throughout her body.
"They could," he conceded, and the way he said it made her shiver.
6. "Severus?" Hermione asked, stroking her hand over the stubble on his cheek, her head pillowed on his chest.
"Hmm?"
"You planned this, didn't you? You knew perfectly well that as a virgin murderess, that I'd need saving from the unicorns."
He chuckled. "As you knew, too, O knickerless one. I knew you were too impatient to wait until tonight."
"You've got me there. Still, I didn't quite picture losing my virginity upside down in a tree."
Severus snorted. "Technically it was while falling out of a tree."
7. Every single time Hermione returned to Hogwarts from such an encounter, she swore she would never go back, never face such humiliation again, never again allow herself to be so used. Then the week would creep itself toward the following Wednesday--their set meeting day--and, as the day approached, Hermione's resolve would crumble in the face of her raw need for release.
Despite knowing in her heart that what they did was wrong, even Hermione had to admit that she needed release as much as he did. Yes, it was wrong! It was cheep and tawdry; an animalistic rutting between two people who could scarcely speak civilly to each other in the reality of day. The whole situation drove her to distraction even as it kept her sane.
Sanity was a relative term, Hermione had decided. If her friends knew exactly how she spent her Wednesday evenings, they would certainly call her mad. Yet what could be called sane in this war-ravaged world? The campaign against Voldemort and his followers had reached a fever pitch. This was supposed to be her final year in school; Hermione wasn't sure what would happen to her education if the war ever ended. There were no classes at Hogwarts now. The castle and its grounds were a fortress of safety in a war-torn land. Students, professors, their families, and the inhabitants of Hogsmeade now resided within the wards.
8. It's difficult but not impossible. You've seen me. I'd like to know you, before--"
"Yes."
She waited and when he said nothing else, she realised he had given her his answer.
Without a word, she began to remove her robes, laying them atop the stool. Her shoes were simple slip-on affairs, and she did not wear hose so there was nothing to fuss with. When she pulled off her soft linen blouse, she looked back to him, and he sat as if entranced, gazing hungrily at her. He looked so hard she wondered if they'd manage to successfully complete their assignation.
Soon, she was bare before him, and he drew in a shuddering breath, releasing it in a whisper of sound.
"Hermione..."
She moved toward him, pausing just before his knees.
"Are you close?"
He swallowed again and nodded tightly.
"Good. We've only one minute."
That said, she glanced at her timepiece and straddled his lap. Then without preamble, Hermione grasped his hardness and slid onto it, letting it pierce her deeply.
She gasped even as he did and began to kiss him heatedly.
To her surprise he was clumsy at that, even as his lower half moved in smooth, sinuous strokes.
Has he never kissed anyone?
But the question was unimportant as she showed him, rode him, and abruptly felt herself stuttering toward climax.
She pulled free of his lips to cry out, and she felt the warm tickle of his trickling seed in the same instant, felt his rigidity and saw how his mouth had fallen open and his eyes had rolled back.
Pushing down one more time, grinding down hard, she shuddered through her climax and fought to catch her breath. She glanced at her timepiece and drew back regretfully. There were eight seconds left.
9. When the last spasm subsided, he pulled away from her and tucked his limp cock back inside his jeans. She turned to face him, shock and pleading in her tawny eyes.
"Miss Granger, I believe you got what you came for?" He dragged the pack of cigarettes from his back pocket and took one out. He lit it without matches or lighter, and puffed while watching her. Her face was flushed, and she shook ever so slightly.
"Professor, please." She reached for his free hand and placed it on her slick cunt. He allowed her to use his hand, to rub it against herself, as she panted and moaned herself, finally, to orgasm. He stared at her white knickers as she did so, at his come seeping down between her thighs towards them. He knew he'd be thinking about that for a while.
As she pulled up her knickers and smoothed her dress down, she asked what would happen now.
"Happen now, Miss Granger? I go back to my seat and have another drink. You go back to whatever life you have and forget you came here." He started to walk away.
"But Professor, what if I... what if..."
"What if you want to check up on me again? See if I'm all right?" He sneered. "You know where I am."
10. Hermione turned to face the lift doors before rolling her eyes at him. Not willing to give him the last word on the subject, she muttered, "If I had let this lift pass, we would have waited even longer for another lift-which would have been just as full, mind you-and I would have had to eventually do the same thing. It's protocol. I simply saved time."
"So your contention, then, is that you do not abuse your authority. Is that the case?"
Hermione stayed facing forward, refusing to show him by so much as the merest twitch of her body how personally affronted she was by his implication. Neither did she give him the satisfaction of a reply. Concentrating heavily on keeping her breathing and anger in check, she was startled to feel him press his body against hers, his nose burrowing in her hair as he whispered, "Because I distinctly recall weeks trapped in a house with you wherein you used your authority to tease and taunt me mercilessly."
Pressed against the lift doors, Hermione could do nothing but press her hands to it as she turned her head to the side. His lips glanced across her jaw as she did so and heat began to build low in her body as she recalled the last time they'd been this close. "I didn't tease you," she denied, her voice low and firm. "You knew how we were to act, and you agreed to it."
"Was it?"
"Was it what?"
"An act?"
Hermione was silent long enough to frustrate him, apparently, because moments later he took the fleshy part of her earlobe between his teeth, worrying it gently as he pressed his groin against her arse.