Writer's Block: Jackpot
In this order : car (either a Ford 150 or a Mustang ..I'm a shameless Ford girl) , student loans, give my parents money, then new wardrobe!
Last night was almost "Break Up Night."
Alyx & I got into the worst fight we have ever gotten into and it was terrifying.
I don't even know how it happened .. I was sick and spent the whole day pretty much smoking with Ray and sleeping. On the 3rd day in a row that I'd been there.
Before she went to bed I told her I'm disappointed in myself & in my life. Of course, she took this as "I hate you and I'm disappointed and sorry I'm with you."
So when I said "I want to spend more time at school with my friends. She went off. First screaming at me about things that don't really matter. Then yelling about retarded shit. Then about the real stuff. Thats generally how she works. Gets my guard down by bringing up some asinine thing then screaming about what's really bothering her.
It was a bad fight. Like me hitting and punching her .. her telling me she likes to see me cry ..that she doesn't cre how I feel, mocking what I was saying. It was horrible..
After she drove me back (which was after her saying she wasn;t taking me anywhere and I was stuck.. then telling me to get out and she didn't care where I went..then driving away when she told me to get my stuff so she could take me..) she was all apoligies. All i didn't mean it i'm sorry you should be with your friends.
I don't know how to look at her the same. She's broken my heart.
Last night was almost "Break Up Night."
Alyx & I got into the worst fight we have ever gotten into and it was terrifying.
I don't even know how it happened .. I was sick and spent the whole day pretty much smoking with Ray and sleeping. On the 3rd day in a row that I'd been there.
Before she went to bed I told her I'm disappointed in myself & in my life. Of course, she took this as "I hate you and I'm disappointed and sorry I'm with you."
So when I said "I want to spend more time at school with my friends. She went off. First screaming at me about things that don't really matter. Then yelling about retarded shit. Then about the real stuff. Thats generally how she works. Gets my guard down by bringing up some asinine thing then screaming about what's really bothering her.
It was a bad fight. Like me hitting and punching her .. her telling me she likes to see me cry ..that she doesn't cre how I feel, mocking what I was saying. It was horrible..
After she drove me back (which was after her saying she wasn;t taking me anywhere and I was stuck.. then telling me to get out and she didn't care where I went..then driving away when she told me to get my stuff so she could take me..) she was all apoligies. All i didn't mean it i'm sorry you should be with your friends.
I don't know how to look at her the same. She's broken my heart.