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Diatribe about my crush
So, I am completely psyching myself out about Yasmin. I had a good talk with Anna last night about her, and I honestly believe that we'd be good for each other, because we've both had rocky romantic histories. It's the not seeing her that gets to me, because I have the time to sit here and think to myself, and say things like "oh god, what if I come across as being too loud and obnoxious? What if I come on too strong?" and I completely fuck with myself mentally. I'm my own worst enemy, as always. I do like her, and I want to get to know her better, but I don't want to be that creepy guy who Facebook stalks her and gets her screen name. I've made contact in the form of a Myspace contact, and gotten a response, which I view as innocuous enough. Seriously, I suck at this whole "romantic interest" thing.
I'm doing the exact same thing that I did with Anna over Christmas break. As previously stated in my journal, when I de-stress, it seriously makes me nuts for a bit, which Anna got caught right in the middle of. I came up with a speech off the cuff about wanting to get comfortable with Yasmin (not in sexual way, pervs) that I wrote up on Anna's wall, and I'll re-post here, just because I'm proud of it:
"I want to be comfortable with you. I don't mean that sexually by any means. I just mean that I want come home and sit with you on the couch. I want to take you dancing, even though I can't dance. I want to tell you how pretty you are, even in sweats. I want to cook you dinner, and surprise you at work with flowers, and laugh at stupid movies together. I want tickle you until you can't breathe, and then kiss you until I can't either. I want to get comfortable with you, if you'll have me."
We both agreed that if I just blurted that out at this stage in the game, it would scare her off, but I think it's romantic, and I would love to tell her that at some point.
Like I told Anna, it's not selling her to me that's the problem, it's selling me to her.
So, I am completely psyching myself out about Yasmin. I had a good talk with Anna last night about her, and I honestly believe that we'd be good for each other, because we've both had rocky romantic histories. It's the not seeing her that gets to me, because I have the time to sit here and think to myself, and say things like "oh god, what if I come across as being too loud and obnoxious? What if I come on too strong?" and I completely fuck with myself mentally. I'm my own worst enemy, as always. I do like her, and I want to get to know her better, but I don't want to be that creepy guy who Facebook stalks her and gets her screen name. I've made contact in the form of a Myspace contact, and gotten a response, which I view as innocuous enough. Seriously, I suck at this whole "romantic interest" thing.
I'm doing the exact same thing that I did with Anna over Christmas break. As previously stated in my journal, when I de-stress, it seriously makes me nuts for a bit, which Anna got caught right in the middle of. I came up with a speech off the cuff about wanting to get comfortable with Yasmin (not in sexual way, pervs) that I wrote up on Anna's wall, and I'll re-post here, just because I'm proud of it:
"I want to be comfortable with you. I don't mean that sexually by any means. I just mean that I want come home and sit with you on the couch. I want to take you dancing, even though I can't dance. I want to tell you how pretty you are, even in sweats. I want to cook you dinner, and surprise you at work with flowers, and laugh at stupid movies together. I want tickle you until you can't breathe, and then kiss you until I can't either. I want to get comfortable with you, if you'll have me."
We both agreed that if I just blurted that out at this stage in the game, it would scare her off, but I think it's romantic, and I would love to tell her that at some point.
Like I told Anna, it's not selling her to me that's the problem, it's selling me to her.