...where to start...um today was fuckin shitty and stuff...i guess.....i unno im just in the completely wrong mood for life right now. im depressed because im not with people, even tho i had the opportunity to be...its like im punishing myself...i hate me...i wish i would die....but only sometimes......i kinda really wanted to go to the KHS show ( Read more... )

well i just get home and i find out my dad has been laid off...yay......i cant beleive this is happening. it all goes down the drain...fuck...why do i even bother?.....i know...its because i think thats its gonna get better when it never does....damnit...i wanna smoke some weed....peace, in death

god...i feel so helpless and hopeless right now. i wish i didnt but w/e. i guess one of my teachers called and some shit she said i was late to class alot and other shit. ha, late to class...ya know i think i should just skip the rest of her classes for the year. my dad is telling me how im sucessful when i do stuff and how i could go into a ( Read more... )

uhhh.....my parents think i might have mono because i am oh so fatiuged but i think its doubtful. felt better after lunch but i think that was becuz of the energy drink i had...made me piss like a race horse. my moms crack head friend just called...she sounded pissed but oh well thats what ya get fer bein a crackhead. one of the other things i hate ( Read more... )

well i officially pissed my mom off. i guess she gets angry when i turn on the bathroom fan...somebodies going through withdrawal. psht she says she love me but those are just empty words sometimes. she says shes trying to stop buts its too hard. yeah ok i know people who have gone through heroin withdrawal and theyve been clean. i dont know ( Read more... )

such a prolific quote and so true....i feel so unloved and unappreciated as of right now, as if im just here and not their son...i hate them....i hate myself and i want to die.....I AM SO ALONE!!!! ...i need your hugs to make it all better...but your not here. can i send you a letter?? an e-mail?? a phone call?? no, i cant because you dont exist ( Read more... )

ive just come to the realization that this is probably the last christmas im going to spend with my family. its depressing to realize that so much of my life is behind me and that for the majority of it i didnt have anyone to share it with.... the "cheer" of the season is getting to me...the fake happiness, the blatant commercial materialism.... ( Read more... )

hey just wanted to let the ppls who care kno that theres a good probability that i could be homeless soon but dont worry im resilient....i hope... hey, i wont kill myself but i need fucking support from friends...especaially anyone.....fuck....too goddamn baked for this....im gonna go to bed....fucking help me ( Read more... )

well its been awhile....but fuck all that i got shit to complain about. fuckin what the fuck is up with the "your mom" stuff?? wasnt that like 4th grade?? i mean have several members of the senior class degenerated to that level?? can they not see that im volatile??? i mean seriously....but i guess that doesnt matter. whatever ill just kill them ( Read more... )

i dont think ive ever had true love for anyone in my life. i dont even love my parents. everything has always been a crush of some degree. and i dont think that ill find someone to love for awhile. ive met people that i would have liked to love, but they didnt have the hope for me that i had for them. oh well, ive waited close to 18 years ( Read more... )