Fanfiction
Title: In the Eye of the Viewfinder
Characters: Ritsuka, Soubi and others
Rating: T
Summary: Twenty-one-year-old Ritsuka works as a photographer. Sometimes, he does a scoop for the police with his friend, Keita, despite his fighter's protests. One day, they get the scoop of their lives: nailing one of the most dangerous yakuza in Japan.
...
Inner Demons
...
Without further ado, Nisei led the two photographers to a car, chatting at a maddening speed. Ritsuka literally felt he was losing his brain cells listening to him, while Keita looked ready to burst into tears.
If he had not known what had been happening before, he certainly had no words to describe the total unreality of the current situation. Here he was, with his best friend sulking, being escorted by undoubtedly the most dangerous man in Japan. For his entire life, he had been convinced a man like Akame would be chillingly silent and intimidating, while the yakuza…
- A BMW! - Akame spat pointing to the sleek car - Can you believe that? A fucking BMW! No one, literally no one drives those, unless they're uncivilised brutes! Football hooligans drive bimmers, drug dealers, film stars of one season… No self-respecting businessman would choose one, and I fucking told him, but he came up with some crap about keeping up appearances, but you know him - he suddenly turned to Ritsuka - He did this because I was right, and he fucking can't stand when I'm right, hell if anyone other than he is, so he made it up. He's always been jealous that it's me who knows how the world of the well-off works, so he *never* listens to me, unless I physically force him to wear the right suit or drag him to a banquet because politeness requires our presence there, because that hijo de puta is so full of himself he actually believes everyone should run to him and beg for a minute of his time…
It was surreal. Keita did not know what to think anymore, was this some kind of a prank the police organised? What was with that guy? They were hostages, for the lack of a better word, and he was ranting at his boss to them…
Finally, Akame pushed them towards the car. Ritsuka grunted, sending him a murderous glare.
- Oh my! - Akame theatrically hit his forehead with his hand - I've forgotten to tell the guys what they're to do now! I'm sooo not good at commanding, I keep forgetting my own people! - he chirped - How inconvenient, do you mind waiting for me here? I guess you don't, kind hearts that you are - he smiled - I'll just leave you here.
With that, he produced to pairs of handcuffs from the car and began manacling them to a passenger's seat.
Keita let himself be manhandled as the yakuza wished, but Ritsuka hissed at the man hotly.
- You know you don't have to do that, don't you?
The man smiled sweetly.
- Claro. But I'm sentimental - with that, he was gone, lost in the darkness of the docks.
...
- It's not so bad, is it? - Keita whispered as soon as the guy disappeared - I mean, you saved my life, you're incredible, Ritsuka, talking him into doing that…
Ritsuka snorted, banging his head on the car's window.
- Keita - he sighed, his voice suddenly very tired and broken - You don't understand.
- Well, of course I don't! But it's still alright, you saving our hides like that, I swear, I'd never be able to do that, the guy looked so scary, but hey, he turned out to be pretty easily manipulated…
- Manipulated? - Ritsuka laughed mirthlessly - You don't get it. I didn't manipulate him into doing anything. He's not like that. He can play people as he wishes, but no one can deceive him, trust me.
Keita blinked in puzzlement.
- What? But you just…
- I proposed a game. He accepted it - noticing his friend's blank stare, Ritsuka continued - When he told them to shoot you, I didn't manipulate him into letting you go. I simply offered to play a game with him, and he gladly agreed.
Keita gulped, uncomfortable with the direction in which their conversion was heading.
- A game? A game in which my life was at stake? - he demanded.
- It worked, didn't it?
Keita fell silent, closing his eyes. Gods, it did. Help him.
- Why did he accept your game? - his voice was barely audible in a heavy stillness of the car.
Ritsuka's lips twisted in a grimace similar to a smirk.
- Because he can't walk away from a challenge. Challenge him I did, expressing my doubt in his ability to read Iskandar… He couldn't let it go, he needs, no, he *craves* finding out who's right… Whether Iskandar truly cares about my life or death - Ritsuka took a deep breath to even his erratic breathing - Besides, he was bored. He's always bored, unless he's killing someone, or stalking, or doing research, or blackmailing. And when he's bored, he acts out. He acted out: he decided to play my game.
Keita measured his friend's slumped figure suspiciously.
- How can you tell all of that? You know him, don't you? How?
Ritsuka did not even move, pressing his forehead into a passenger's head rest.
- I've met him. It was years ago - he did not provide any more details - Keita, please, be careful around him. Don't underestimate him. He *is* the most dangerous man you can meet in your entire life, don't be fooled by his childish behaviour. We're far from being safe right now, he can still change his mind about not killing us. No matter what I or he said, he's not afraid of Iskandar. At least - he amended - Not enough. And he's too valuable to Iskandar to be in any danger of being punished too harshly. Actually, he's priceless to him.
Keita knew there was much his friend wasn't telling him. It takes more than one brief meeting to understand the complexity of a person's character the way Ritsuka understood Akame, much deeper and more regular discussions than some random chats. And Keita wasn't careless not to notice Ritsuka's slip about Iskandar. His friend implied that Iskandar may have some strong reasons against killing Aoyagi, ones about which Akame knew. That could only mean one thing: Ritsuka had met and known for a rather long time both Iskandar and Akame.
Despite that, Keita still trusted his friend to be one of the good guys. He desperately hoped it wasn't a blind, naïve trust.
- So, we're only safe…
- As long as we keep him entertained by the game. Or as long as he still feels the challenge - Ritsuka was aware of the weight of this statement - I can't guarantee anything, he's unpredictable. There's no pattern to his actions, they're all whimsical. You know, when a child sees a colourful lollipop, they want to taste it? That's what he's like, when he sees something interesting, be it a book, a person, a situation, he wants to try it out, consequences or logic be damned. If he doesn't get what he expects from my game, he's going to kill us before we even see Iskandar.
- Why's that…?
- Why? - Ritsuka smirked without amusement - Because he's a sociopath. Sociopaths get bored easily.
A pregnant silence.
- And do you know why he left us here?
Keita shook his head mutely.
- Because he wanted us to have this conversation. He's enjoying the game.
...
Nisei slipped into a driver's seat soundlessly, causing his hostages to jump up in surprise.
- All taken care of - he sing-songed, putting a key in an ignition - How silly of me to forget about those faithful gorillas. Never thought you could train monkeys to be that obedient, sabes, Rit-chan? - he turned back and winked at Ritsuka.
Aoyagi grimaced. He'd never got and he'd probably never get used to his brother and Nisei's perception of humans.
Sensing his disapproval, Nisei carried on in the same reckless manner like before.
- They were just standing there, all confused and angry. How odd! One would think thugs like them would be more assertive - he paused to start the car.
Then, he continued.
- Maybe assertive isn't the best word, is it, Rit-chan? You know emotions have never been my strong point - he clearly wanted Ritsuka to answer.
The boy knew keeping Nisei "entertained" would be mind-numbing, but he had to try. For Keita's sake.
- I suppose everyone would be at loss if you just left them like that - he chose his words carefully - Am I right to assume you're their leader?
Nisei stuck his tongue out to demonstrate his dissatisfaction with the task.
- Ya, Nisei - el líder - he parroted - Aburrido. Never been good at playing team sports. I don't think well for others.
- You generally don't think well for yourself - Ritsuka couldn't help but add maliciously - It may be for the better you don't drag others with you when you're coming down.
Trust a lunatic to burst into giggles when you insult them like that.
- Tenes razón - Nisei nodded when his giggles tailed off - Why is the puppy silent? Make it move or I'll decide it's dead and dump it in a garbage can…
Ritsuka's head jerked up, the boy unable to comprehend the rambling. Gods, Nisei's condition must have worsened over time. When he had last met him four years ago he'd tended to make more sense.
- Or is it that the puppy is afraid of the bigger doggy? Doggy doesn't bite, unless He says so.
Ritsuka peered at a pale petrified Keita and finally realised what Nisei meant.
- Leave him alone - he snapped, moving to his friend's side as much as the handcuffs allowed him to.
Nisei clapped his hands, what made Ritsuka's heart still for a moment, because the fighter let go of the steering wheel. The catboy heard his friend gulp.
- And keep your hands on the wheel! - Ritsuka shrieked, glaring at the unconcerned man - Who the hell gave you a driving licence…
Nisei put his hair behind his ear, snickering.
- Nadie. They sold it to me.
Ritsuka growled in despair. No wonder his brother was slightly crazy after dealing with this guy on daily basis.
- No worries, Rit-chan, I'm doing just fine!
Keita was green with fright, which didn't go unnoticed by either Ritsuka or Nisei.
- Your definition of "fine" has always been somewhat flawed. You're going to succeed in killing us without a use of your gun if you keep this up - the sacrifice grunted when they missed a lone cyclist by an inch.
Keita had closed his eyes at some point, his lips moving in a silent prayer.
Ritsuka was a little bit concerned with their safety, but he had to admit he trusted Nisei's fighter's reflexes. Akame was one of the best, after all, no need to delude himself.
- I've never had an accident - Nisei huffed indignantly - Unless you count that one time when He was driving… Besides, doggy has no need to use a gun to finish the kitty and the puppy off. One word is more than enough - he abruptly turned left.
Ritsuka and Keita both felt themselves going icily cold when the car was stopped in dark shadows of a high building. With Nisei being even more unstable than Ritsuka could remember, it didn't bode well. Was he planning to…
Slowly, the dark fighter turned back to face them, a feral grin on his face, pupils dilated with the same sickness Keita had seen at the docks.
A mobile went off.
Pouting, Nisei bent down to take care of it, giving the photographers a second to exchange thrilled glances.
When he focused his attention on them again, the only quality visible in his dark irises was his keen intelligence that brought him the title of the most dangerous yakuza and the most feared fighter in the country.
- I'll never kill you - his voice, though still a bit too high for a man, held a note of huskiness and grave seriousness - Do you know why, Ritsuka? - his eyes flashed.
The first thought that crossed Ritsuka's mind was that it was like facing a black panther, a lazy predator playing with its prey before the final attack.
- No - he whispered, shaking his head.
He willed himself to look into those almost black, hellish pits.
Nisei smirked and another memory came to Ritsuka unbidden. That of the confrontation with the dark fighter at the Academy, before capturing Akame and seeing his bratty side.
But that night, Nisei had been a personification of the Devil.
- I'll never kill you - the liquid voice was overcoming their senses like a venom, Nisei was probably casting a spell on the photographers - Because of the very same reason you'll never kill me, Ritsuka.
The boy blinked in hope to shake himself off the magic.
- W-what…?
The fighter fully resembled a feline.
- Not because of your pacifistic beliefs, I'm not going to claim to share them. Do you know why you'll never kill me?
Ritsuka couldn't answer this question.
- Because I fascinate you.
Ritsuka opened his mouth to disagree, but no sound came forth.
- Yes, I do. And you fascinate me. We're so alike, Ritsuka, you don't even begin to imagine…
To that Ritsuka protested fiercely.
- I'm nothing like you!
Nisei arched his elegant eyebrow.
- No? Don't you wish to always understand your friends? Your opponents? To find out their motives, things that secretly push them into behaving in the way they do? Doesn't a human mind intrigue you?
Ritsuka was so captivated by the velvet voice and the eyes shining like the moon above a distant desert that he remained completely unaware of Keita's distressed gaze on him.
- Of course it does - Nisei carried on - Just the way it makes me crave to explore every part of it, even the most hidden ones. A human mind is such a glorious asset. Yet, it so often leads to their downfall… It can turn a person into a demon, make them crave other's pain, blood and suffering, just because it's far greater than a human mind is supposed to be. Isn't it that geniuses have the most appalling tastes and desires? That their minds choose to forfeit the innate morality for the sake of developing their unmatched intelligence? That they take the control over those individuals' souls from their hands?
Ritsuka had His face before his eyes.
- It can turn a person into a shell, unable to act on their own, lost forever in their fears and memories, running in a vicious, never-ending circle of death, betrayal and an illusion of love… It all happens in a human mind, the sole thing that determines a human self, without letting that human decide…
Ritsuka's pulse quickened.
- It does fascinate you. I can see it in your eyes, your pupils wide with curiosity, with what you know is a sick fascination, an obsession too strong to be healthy. Yet, you *crave* that knowledge, you'd do anything to *understand*… And there's a thin line between understanding and using this knowledge. For now, it's enough for you to understand, you're feeding yourself a lie that understanding is all you want, that you need it to help them… But a day will come when you'll try to experiment, to see if you can make a person act on their mind's hidden secrets.
To Keita's horror, Ritsuka began to tremble.
- It's an intoxicating experience, to make others move like puppets on strings held by God… It's like a narcotic, stealing that power from God for few moments… To be the Director in the Theatre that the world is… All the World is the Stage and to stand beyond it, to be no actor, no spectator, but the Director of the Theatrum Mundi is the true Graal of this life…
A short pause.
The air in the car seemed to be vibrating.
- And what you want to find out the most, is what makes Him love me. What possessed the sole person in your life that has ever claimed to love you and only you exclusively to bestow that gift on a being that is nothing more than a lunatic. You want to see what's under the mask of a psychopath, whether there is something here. To comprehend how a bright, relatively nice person could've turned into a monster. The monster who'll never kill you, because he wants to see what makes you so special that you used to be the centre of His universe for such a long time. To test if your gentle nature hides dark secrets. If it can be broken and melded into something more powerful, if you share your nature with Him…
Keita's teeth were clattering, the inside of the car cold like a winter night.
Ritsuka felt the heat of the desert's midday.
The heat pulsating in every fibre of his body.
- We'll never attempt to kill each other, oh no, we won't. You know why?
The heat increased tenfold.
- Because we're both too ambitious for that. It's Him that has to decide who's better suited to stay at His side. We both only care about His opinion, His choice. Our worlds resolve about Him, and we both understand that killing the rival means admitting to be a coward. A coward unable to find out. A coward petrified of the prospect of being abandoned. We've both already experienced it, we know what it feels like to be lost in the darkest pits of despair when He leaves. Years have passed, yet you still dream about Him. I still dread being discarded because of you, because of His love towards you. It's going to be our fate till the day we die, that constant insecurity, uncertainty. I may pride myself in being the object of His undivided love right now, but I cannot predict His reaction when He sees you again after all those years. Even if I stay by His side till my or His death, I'll never cease to worry that you'll appear and steal Him from me. Yet, I cannot kill you, because I'd have to live with the knowledge that He never chose me. That I may only be a substitute, the best option available. That's the very reason you'll never kill me either.
Keita had had enough. He may not know what exactly they were talking about, or rather what Akame was talking about, but he didn't like the effect it had on Ritsuka one bit. His friend was looking into the yakuza's eyes like hypnotised and the yakuza's words did sound like a trance-inducing spell. The fact that Ritsuka was shaking and covered in gleaming sweat was also more than disturbing.
Forgetting all the warnings Ritsuka's given him, Keita kicked his friend, aiming for his calf.
Startled at the sudden pain, Ritsuka blinked furiously, trying to locate its source. When he finally met Keita's eyes, his face spoke of the gratitude he felt.
Keita was right, Ritsuka had no wish of listening to the guy. It was troubling him.
Breathing deeply to calms himself down, Ritsuka glared at Nisei.
The fighter was observing him casually, his dark demeanour mostly gone. But he was clearly taking delight in Ritsuka's fear.
And Ritsuka couldn't help but wonder whether Nisei was right.
...
Characters: Ritsuka, Soubi and others
Rating: T
Summary: Twenty-one-year-old Ritsuka works as a photographer. Sometimes, he does a scoop for the police with his friend, Keita, despite his fighter's protests. One day, they get the scoop of their lives: nailing one of the most dangerous yakuza in Japan.
...
Inner Demons
...
Without further ado, Nisei led the two photographers to a car, chatting at a maddening speed. Ritsuka literally felt he was losing his brain cells listening to him, while Keita looked ready to burst into tears.
If he had not known what had been happening before, he certainly had no words to describe the total unreality of the current situation. Here he was, with his best friend sulking, being escorted by undoubtedly the most dangerous man in Japan. For his entire life, he had been convinced a man like Akame would be chillingly silent and intimidating, while the yakuza…
- A BMW! - Akame spat pointing to the sleek car - Can you believe that? A fucking BMW! No one, literally no one drives those, unless they're uncivilised brutes! Football hooligans drive bimmers, drug dealers, film stars of one season… No self-respecting businessman would choose one, and I fucking told him, but he came up with some crap about keeping up appearances, but you know him - he suddenly turned to Ritsuka - He did this because I was right, and he fucking can't stand when I'm right, hell if anyone other than he is, so he made it up. He's always been jealous that it's me who knows how the world of the well-off works, so he *never* listens to me, unless I physically force him to wear the right suit or drag him to a banquet because politeness requires our presence there, because that hijo de puta is so full of himself he actually believes everyone should run to him and beg for a minute of his time…
It was surreal. Keita did not know what to think anymore, was this some kind of a prank the police organised? What was with that guy? They were hostages, for the lack of a better word, and he was ranting at his boss to them…
Finally, Akame pushed them towards the car. Ritsuka grunted, sending him a murderous glare.
- Oh my! - Akame theatrically hit his forehead with his hand - I've forgotten to tell the guys what they're to do now! I'm sooo not good at commanding, I keep forgetting my own people! - he chirped - How inconvenient, do you mind waiting for me here? I guess you don't, kind hearts that you are - he smiled - I'll just leave you here.
With that, he produced to pairs of handcuffs from the car and began manacling them to a passenger's seat.
Keita let himself be manhandled as the yakuza wished, but Ritsuka hissed at the man hotly.
- You know you don't have to do that, don't you?
The man smiled sweetly.
- Claro. But I'm sentimental - with that, he was gone, lost in the darkness of the docks.
...
- It's not so bad, is it? - Keita whispered as soon as the guy disappeared - I mean, you saved my life, you're incredible, Ritsuka, talking him into doing that…
Ritsuka snorted, banging his head on the car's window.
- Keita - he sighed, his voice suddenly very tired and broken - You don't understand.
- Well, of course I don't! But it's still alright, you saving our hides like that, I swear, I'd never be able to do that, the guy looked so scary, but hey, he turned out to be pretty easily manipulated…
- Manipulated? - Ritsuka laughed mirthlessly - You don't get it. I didn't manipulate him into doing anything. He's not like that. He can play people as he wishes, but no one can deceive him, trust me.
Keita blinked in puzzlement.
- What? But you just…
- I proposed a game. He accepted it - noticing his friend's blank stare, Ritsuka continued - When he told them to shoot you, I didn't manipulate him into letting you go. I simply offered to play a game with him, and he gladly agreed.
Keita gulped, uncomfortable with the direction in which their conversion was heading.
- A game? A game in which my life was at stake? - he demanded.
- It worked, didn't it?
Keita fell silent, closing his eyes. Gods, it did. Help him.
- Why did he accept your game? - his voice was barely audible in a heavy stillness of the car.
Ritsuka's lips twisted in a grimace similar to a smirk.
- Because he can't walk away from a challenge. Challenge him I did, expressing my doubt in his ability to read Iskandar… He couldn't let it go, he needs, no, he *craves* finding out who's right… Whether Iskandar truly cares about my life or death - Ritsuka took a deep breath to even his erratic breathing - Besides, he was bored. He's always bored, unless he's killing someone, or stalking, or doing research, or blackmailing. And when he's bored, he acts out. He acted out: he decided to play my game.
Keita measured his friend's slumped figure suspiciously.
- How can you tell all of that? You know him, don't you? How?
Ritsuka did not even move, pressing his forehead into a passenger's head rest.
- I've met him. It was years ago - he did not provide any more details - Keita, please, be careful around him. Don't underestimate him. He *is* the most dangerous man you can meet in your entire life, don't be fooled by his childish behaviour. We're far from being safe right now, he can still change his mind about not killing us. No matter what I or he said, he's not afraid of Iskandar. At least - he amended - Not enough. And he's too valuable to Iskandar to be in any danger of being punished too harshly. Actually, he's priceless to him.
Keita knew there was much his friend wasn't telling him. It takes more than one brief meeting to understand the complexity of a person's character the way Ritsuka understood Akame, much deeper and more regular discussions than some random chats. And Keita wasn't careless not to notice Ritsuka's slip about Iskandar. His friend implied that Iskandar may have some strong reasons against killing Aoyagi, ones about which Akame knew. That could only mean one thing: Ritsuka had met and known for a rather long time both Iskandar and Akame.
Despite that, Keita still trusted his friend to be one of the good guys. He desperately hoped it wasn't a blind, naïve trust.
- So, we're only safe…
- As long as we keep him entertained by the game. Or as long as he still feels the challenge - Ritsuka was aware of the weight of this statement - I can't guarantee anything, he's unpredictable. There's no pattern to his actions, they're all whimsical. You know, when a child sees a colourful lollipop, they want to taste it? That's what he's like, when he sees something interesting, be it a book, a person, a situation, he wants to try it out, consequences or logic be damned. If he doesn't get what he expects from my game, he's going to kill us before we even see Iskandar.
- Why's that…?
- Why? - Ritsuka smirked without amusement - Because he's a sociopath. Sociopaths get bored easily.
A pregnant silence.
- And do you know why he left us here?
Keita shook his head mutely.
- Because he wanted us to have this conversation. He's enjoying the game.
...
Nisei slipped into a driver's seat soundlessly, causing his hostages to jump up in surprise.
- All taken care of - he sing-songed, putting a key in an ignition - How silly of me to forget about those faithful gorillas. Never thought you could train monkeys to be that obedient, sabes, Rit-chan? - he turned back and winked at Ritsuka.
Aoyagi grimaced. He'd never got and he'd probably never get used to his brother and Nisei's perception of humans.
Sensing his disapproval, Nisei carried on in the same reckless manner like before.
- They were just standing there, all confused and angry. How odd! One would think thugs like them would be more assertive - he paused to start the car.
Then, he continued.
- Maybe assertive isn't the best word, is it, Rit-chan? You know emotions have never been my strong point - he clearly wanted Ritsuka to answer.
The boy knew keeping Nisei "entertained" would be mind-numbing, but he had to try. For Keita's sake.
- I suppose everyone would be at loss if you just left them like that - he chose his words carefully - Am I right to assume you're their leader?
Nisei stuck his tongue out to demonstrate his dissatisfaction with the task.
- Ya, Nisei - el líder - he parroted - Aburrido. Never been good at playing team sports. I don't think well for others.
- You generally don't think well for yourself - Ritsuka couldn't help but add maliciously - It may be for the better you don't drag others with you when you're coming down.
Trust a lunatic to burst into giggles when you insult them like that.
- Tenes razón - Nisei nodded when his giggles tailed off - Why is the puppy silent? Make it move or I'll decide it's dead and dump it in a garbage can…
Ritsuka's head jerked up, the boy unable to comprehend the rambling. Gods, Nisei's condition must have worsened over time. When he had last met him four years ago he'd tended to make more sense.
- Or is it that the puppy is afraid of the bigger doggy? Doggy doesn't bite, unless He says so.
Ritsuka peered at a pale petrified Keita and finally realised what Nisei meant.
- Leave him alone - he snapped, moving to his friend's side as much as the handcuffs allowed him to.
Nisei clapped his hands, what made Ritsuka's heart still for a moment, because the fighter let go of the steering wheel. The catboy heard his friend gulp.
- And keep your hands on the wheel! - Ritsuka shrieked, glaring at the unconcerned man - Who the hell gave you a driving licence…
Nisei put his hair behind his ear, snickering.
- Nadie. They sold it to me.
Ritsuka growled in despair. No wonder his brother was slightly crazy after dealing with this guy on daily basis.
- No worries, Rit-chan, I'm doing just fine!
Keita was green with fright, which didn't go unnoticed by either Ritsuka or Nisei.
- Your definition of "fine" has always been somewhat flawed. You're going to succeed in killing us without a use of your gun if you keep this up - the sacrifice grunted when they missed a lone cyclist by an inch.
Keita had closed his eyes at some point, his lips moving in a silent prayer.
Ritsuka was a little bit concerned with their safety, but he had to admit he trusted Nisei's fighter's reflexes. Akame was one of the best, after all, no need to delude himself.
- I've never had an accident - Nisei huffed indignantly - Unless you count that one time when He was driving… Besides, doggy has no need to use a gun to finish the kitty and the puppy off. One word is more than enough - he abruptly turned left.
Ritsuka and Keita both felt themselves going icily cold when the car was stopped in dark shadows of a high building. With Nisei being even more unstable than Ritsuka could remember, it didn't bode well. Was he planning to…
Slowly, the dark fighter turned back to face them, a feral grin on his face, pupils dilated with the same sickness Keita had seen at the docks.
A mobile went off.
Pouting, Nisei bent down to take care of it, giving the photographers a second to exchange thrilled glances.
When he focused his attention on them again, the only quality visible in his dark irises was his keen intelligence that brought him the title of the most dangerous yakuza and the most feared fighter in the country.
- I'll never kill you - his voice, though still a bit too high for a man, held a note of huskiness and grave seriousness - Do you know why, Ritsuka? - his eyes flashed.
The first thought that crossed Ritsuka's mind was that it was like facing a black panther, a lazy predator playing with its prey before the final attack.
- No - he whispered, shaking his head.
He willed himself to look into those almost black, hellish pits.
Nisei smirked and another memory came to Ritsuka unbidden. That of the confrontation with the dark fighter at the Academy, before capturing Akame and seeing his bratty side.
But that night, Nisei had been a personification of the Devil.
- I'll never kill you - the liquid voice was overcoming their senses like a venom, Nisei was probably casting a spell on the photographers - Because of the very same reason you'll never kill me, Ritsuka.
The boy blinked in hope to shake himself off the magic.
- W-what…?
The fighter fully resembled a feline.
- Not because of your pacifistic beliefs, I'm not going to claim to share them. Do you know why you'll never kill me?
Ritsuka couldn't answer this question.
- Because I fascinate you.
Ritsuka opened his mouth to disagree, but no sound came forth.
- Yes, I do. And you fascinate me. We're so alike, Ritsuka, you don't even begin to imagine…
To that Ritsuka protested fiercely.
- I'm nothing like you!
Nisei arched his elegant eyebrow.
- No? Don't you wish to always understand your friends? Your opponents? To find out their motives, things that secretly push them into behaving in the way they do? Doesn't a human mind intrigue you?
Ritsuka was so captivated by the velvet voice and the eyes shining like the moon above a distant desert that he remained completely unaware of Keita's distressed gaze on him.
- Of course it does - Nisei carried on - Just the way it makes me crave to explore every part of it, even the most hidden ones. A human mind is such a glorious asset. Yet, it so often leads to their downfall… It can turn a person into a demon, make them crave other's pain, blood and suffering, just because it's far greater than a human mind is supposed to be. Isn't it that geniuses have the most appalling tastes and desires? That their minds choose to forfeit the innate morality for the sake of developing their unmatched intelligence? That they take the control over those individuals' souls from their hands?
Ritsuka had His face before his eyes.
- It can turn a person into a shell, unable to act on their own, lost forever in their fears and memories, running in a vicious, never-ending circle of death, betrayal and an illusion of love… It all happens in a human mind, the sole thing that determines a human self, without letting that human decide…
Ritsuka's pulse quickened.
- It does fascinate you. I can see it in your eyes, your pupils wide with curiosity, with what you know is a sick fascination, an obsession too strong to be healthy. Yet, you *crave* that knowledge, you'd do anything to *understand*… And there's a thin line between understanding and using this knowledge. For now, it's enough for you to understand, you're feeding yourself a lie that understanding is all you want, that you need it to help them… But a day will come when you'll try to experiment, to see if you can make a person act on their mind's hidden secrets.
To Keita's horror, Ritsuka began to tremble.
- It's an intoxicating experience, to make others move like puppets on strings held by God… It's like a narcotic, stealing that power from God for few moments… To be the Director in the Theatre that the world is… All the World is the Stage and to stand beyond it, to be no actor, no spectator, but the Director of the Theatrum Mundi is the true Graal of this life…
A short pause.
The air in the car seemed to be vibrating.
- And what you want to find out the most, is what makes Him love me. What possessed the sole person in your life that has ever claimed to love you and only you exclusively to bestow that gift on a being that is nothing more than a lunatic. You want to see what's under the mask of a psychopath, whether there is something here. To comprehend how a bright, relatively nice person could've turned into a monster. The monster who'll never kill you, because he wants to see what makes you so special that you used to be the centre of His universe for such a long time. To test if your gentle nature hides dark secrets. If it can be broken and melded into something more powerful, if you share your nature with Him…
Keita's teeth were clattering, the inside of the car cold like a winter night.
Ritsuka felt the heat of the desert's midday.
The heat pulsating in every fibre of his body.
- We'll never attempt to kill each other, oh no, we won't. You know why?
The heat increased tenfold.
- Because we're both too ambitious for that. It's Him that has to decide who's better suited to stay at His side. We both only care about His opinion, His choice. Our worlds resolve about Him, and we both understand that killing the rival means admitting to be a coward. A coward unable to find out. A coward petrified of the prospect of being abandoned. We've both already experienced it, we know what it feels like to be lost in the darkest pits of despair when He leaves. Years have passed, yet you still dream about Him. I still dread being discarded because of you, because of His love towards you. It's going to be our fate till the day we die, that constant insecurity, uncertainty. I may pride myself in being the object of His undivided love right now, but I cannot predict His reaction when He sees you again after all those years. Even if I stay by His side till my or His death, I'll never cease to worry that you'll appear and steal Him from me. Yet, I cannot kill you, because I'd have to live with the knowledge that He never chose me. That I may only be a substitute, the best option available. That's the very reason you'll never kill me either.
Keita had had enough. He may not know what exactly they were talking about, or rather what Akame was talking about, but he didn't like the effect it had on Ritsuka one bit. His friend was looking into the yakuza's eyes like hypnotised and the yakuza's words did sound like a trance-inducing spell. The fact that Ritsuka was shaking and covered in gleaming sweat was also more than disturbing.
Forgetting all the warnings Ritsuka's given him, Keita kicked his friend, aiming for his calf.
Startled at the sudden pain, Ritsuka blinked furiously, trying to locate its source. When he finally met Keita's eyes, his face spoke of the gratitude he felt.
Keita was right, Ritsuka had no wish of listening to the guy. It was troubling him.
Breathing deeply to calms himself down, Ritsuka glared at Nisei.
The fighter was observing him casually, his dark demeanour mostly gone. But he was clearly taking delight in Ritsuka's fear.
And Ritsuka couldn't help but wonder whether Nisei was right.
...