(no subject)
. There is always this worry when talking about (or writing about on LJ :)) why one is feeling down. People tend to apologise for being mopey or self indulgent or more recently "wangsty". And it is true, I think, that it gets to a stage where complaining about the awfulness of it all becomes too much, it becomes unpragmatic. I am not doing anything to help myself if I go on endlessly to people about the same things (and I certainly make an effort to avoid doing so - not that there's much need at the moment since I am reasonably happy). But I think this kind of neediness and urge just to whine about things (that I know I have at times) comes from the fact that people really aren't there for each other. That in order to keep on top of things we have to, to some extent, put ourselves first.
It is easy to avoid people who seem as if they are going to be too demanding and attach themselves too much. But I think that this sort of clingyness and comes from a need for other people to take care of you. And you just can't rely on them to do so infinitely, and to some extent one has to become self-reliant and figure out things for oneself, and not to expect to much from other people. I think it would be so much better if, as everyone were responsible for everyone else (Dostoyevsky puts it like that in The Brothers Karamazov).
Obviously this is impossible at the moment, but I think I am going aim to be kinder to people that I don't necessarily find to be interesting or good company. I despise the idea of being nice to people out of pity. I think, instead it is good to see people as "companions in misery". One quote from the end of the affair by Graham Greene is "I could no longer patronise Henry, I saw that he was a companion in misery." If we see people as being essentially the same as us; if we see that we need them like they need us, and vice versa, this brings us nearer to a situation where we can all be responsible for each other. I hope this all makes sense, I am extremely tired and slightly drunk now. I've been thinking about this stuff for a while. Any comments would be appreciated (and I think I posted stuff similar to this on here before).
It is easy to avoid people who seem as if they are going to be too demanding and attach themselves too much. But I think that this sort of clingyness and comes from a need for other people to take care of you. And you just can't rely on them to do so infinitely, and to some extent one has to become self-reliant and figure out things for oneself, and not to expect to much from other people. I think it would be so much better if, as everyone were responsible for everyone else (Dostoyevsky puts it like that in The Brothers Karamazov).
Obviously this is impossible at the moment, but I think I am going aim to be kinder to people that I don't necessarily find to be interesting or good company. I despise the idea of being nice to people out of pity. I think, instead it is good to see people as "companions in misery". One quote from the end of the affair by Graham Greene is "I could no longer patronise Henry, I saw that he was a companion in misery." If we see people as being essentially the same as us; if we see that we need them like they need us, and vice versa, this brings us nearer to a situation where we can all be responsible for each other. I hope this all makes sense, I am extremely tired and slightly drunk now. I've been thinking about this stuff for a while. Any comments would be appreciated (and I think I posted stuff similar to this on here before).