i go through the motions everyday.
it's all a blurr since the night you laid me down.
every moment without you is a moment that i live to a limited extent.

only when i'm in your presence,
you're in my thoughts,
and your name on the tip of my tongue
am i living.

im so numb.
i have comprimised everything i am
to bask in the glory of the public eye
i have become everything i envied
yet i lack passion
love
trust

i have become ubiquitous, dime a dozen.
what do i have to take pride in?

he made me feel larger than life.

people say you can never be friends with the opposite sex
without some kind of attraction.
we were always the exception.


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i always figured that in your absence
all of my darkest fears would haunt me

i asked myself
what if when youre gone i forgot how to breathe?
what if i could not function?

i learned that all of my fears
were pathetic in comparison to this

something much worst

i'm still breathing ( Read more... )

DisorderRatingParanoid:HighSchizoid:LowSchizotypal:HighAntisocial:HighBorderline:Very HighHistrionic:HighNarcissistic:Very HighAvoidant:LowDependent:ModerateObsessive-Compulsive:High
-- Personality Disorder Test --
-- Personality Disorder Information --

incase anyone was unaware
im completely psychotic lol

man
i really fucked up this time
and theres no going back

fuck you
fuck you
fuck you
fuck you

i guess i just got a taste of my own medicine.
but i want to rip her fuckin heart out..

second guess me.
hate me all you want!

because this time im not fucking up.
no more games babydoll,
for once i know whats right.

and im not letting it go until the second i have to!!
♥ ♥


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TAKE ME BACK MADDDDDDDDSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!

( Read more... )

we both know
that this will never work

youre leaving..

now that you know how i feel its time to move on
because i cant keep holding on to a dream ill never attain.
i dont know how else to let go
we both know
we will always hold a place for each other in our hearts

i didnt lie when i said you were
            my soulmate

my first love
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