A lot on my mind :-(
What's on my mind if you care to... There are only two more days until I start a ridiculously busy Winter Session (6 credits in three weeks). I have been cleaning my room and it just doesn't seem to get clean...Like ever! I want to see people...I do! I just don't seem to have time. Even the bird is pissed off and he lives with me! I have been cleaning and organizing because I want to have a better time management plan come this Spring, so that I can schedule time to do the necessary things (School work and take care of myself) and to do fun stuff (Sometimes, even with humans).
I haven't even gone to my primary care doctor, yet. I have really REALLY been needing to because I have been swelling and having all sorts of other serious bizzare symptoms. I went to the ER for the swelling earlier this semester because the doctor's office told me to go to make sure I wasn't in any immediate danger as a result of congestive heart failure, kidney failure (They made it sound so pretty). I also need to seek further evaluation about my fingers, hands, and arms in relation to swelling, pain, numbness, tingling, weakness, and sometimes I can't even move them. Oh, and a dentist! My teeth are in bad shape and quite painful at this moment. I am ready to pull the one tooth out myself! I hate the dentist. I hate the sound and feel of drills (Novicaine does not work)...OYE! I should see a endometriosis specialist. I think I would rather go to the dentist. The endometriosis should always be checked and maintained though for cancers and other obstructions...Eh...I'm not brave enough right now to go. I would go if they were like..."You can have a hysterectomy." My ears hurt all the time and I can't find a decent ear, nose and throat doctor that takes medicaid.
I suppose in one way, I want to fight and make people help fix me. On the other hand, I get sick of talking until I'm blue in the face and doctor's looking at me like I'm full of shit. I just love when the doctors are like "why didn't you come in sooner?" I usually reply, "because if I came in when I knew what was going on, it wouldn't be obvious to you and you would think I was a hypochondriac." I also love when some doctors (The one at Oswego Hospital) are like..."You were in before a few months ago about swollen hands. You just must have a tendancy to swell. You probably have fluid leaking from an organ somewhere. Take Motrin (I am not supposed to because of my liver). Have a nice day." I wasted hours at the ER for what???????? OMG! This is what makes me want to give up.
Well, I am done ranting for now...I just hope I wake up in the morning....
I haven't even gone to my primary care doctor, yet. I have really REALLY been needing to because I have been swelling and having all sorts of other serious bizzare symptoms. I went to the ER for the swelling earlier this semester because the doctor's office told me to go to make sure I wasn't in any immediate danger as a result of congestive heart failure, kidney failure (They made it sound so pretty). I also need to seek further evaluation about my fingers, hands, and arms in relation to swelling, pain, numbness, tingling, weakness, and sometimes I can't even move them. Oh, and a dentist! My teeth are in bad shape and quite painful at this moment. I am ready to pull the one tooth out myself! I hate the dentist. I hate the sound and feel of drills (Novicaine does not work)...OYE! I should see a endometriosis specialist. I think I would rather go to the dentist. The endometriosis should always be checked and maintained though for cancers and other obstructions...Eh...I'm not brave enough right now to go. I would go if they were like..."You can have a hysterectomy." My ears hurt all the time and I can't find a decent ear, nose and throat doctor that takes medicaid.
I suppose in one way, I want to fight and make people help fix me. On the other hand, I get sick of talking until I'm blue in the face and doctor's looking at me like I'm full of shit. I just love when the doctors are like "why didn't you come in sooner?" I usually reply, "because if I came in when I knew what was going on, it wouldn't be obvious to you and you would think I was a hypochondriac." I also love when some doctors (The one at Oswego Hospital) are like..."You were in before a few months ago about swollen hands. You just must have a tendancy to swell. You probably have fluid leaking from an organ somewhere. Take Motrin (I am not supposed to because of my liver). Have a nice day." I wasted hours at the ER for what???????? OMG! This is what makes me want to give up.
Well, I am done ranting for now...I just hope I wake up in the morning....