To many damn fucking tears rolling down my face...

[rainbowgirlie]

My life has definetly took a turn for the worst. I don't really know what to do right now. I have no one to talk to, no friends, NOBODY. My family situation is realy bad right now. Everyone that knows me knows about my stupid son of a bitch I HOPE HE FUCKING GOES TO HELL and dies Stepfather right? Well I dont really fucking get any of this. I wake

Comments

[eskimojack]

I can relate... my step-father sucked major ass.
my mom, eventually, figured that out, as well.

hang in there! :) **sending happy thoughts**

[rainbowgirlie]

i wish my mom would figure that out. He has her so brainwashed tho its pathetic.

and thank u for the happy thoughts.

[deleriumsmoon]

Poor sweetie...-h u g!-

You know, with that kind of environment, it might be good for you to get out, at least for a little while. Do you have a friend you can bunk with for a little while? It really seems like you love your family dearly, how old are your younger(?) siblings?

I seriously suggest that you stay with a friend.... As for your job, where do you work? There are tons of places in San Francisco (Assuming you live there) to work, so maybe you should try sending in applications inticipating it, so if you do lose your job you have something to fall back on.

-hugs again- Sorry if some of this is just on repeat from others or if you know it already, I just wanna help.

[rainbowgirlie]

oh boy do i WISH i lived in the city. That is where I have always wanted to live. NO i actually dont live there, but I am going to look for a second job and move out. maybe this is what I needed, I need to move out and live my own life..its just hard when you aren't wantedby your family..but thats life right? And moving out will be my best bet I suppose, it will be hard, but everything happens for a reson rigth?

[dontkicknick]

Honestly, I would be lying if I told you I know how you feel, but I do hope you get better !!!

[rainbowgirlie]

thank you, I appreciate that. :)

[vintagewhore]

i'm speechless.

my dad was an alcholic and i did the same things you did. i had to run in the middle of the night to my cousin's house to help her stop... my dad beating my mom. i was also the person who held everything together.

this is the foundation of what makes you... i'm sorry for this shite you have to go through. *hugs and warm smiles*

hot damn! you're warm toast and jelly. you are beautiful, determined, and strong. nobody has to remind you of this but i just thought i'll let you know.

[rainbowgirlie]

thank you so much. Its nice to have people that can understand. It is SO hard to go through, and no one can EVER begin to understand unless they have lived it. period.

[rivgrr]

I think I *can* say I know how you feel.... it's a really shitty feeling and I'm sorry you have to deal with it

[rainbowgirlie]

wow.

thanks riv.

your totally right. That really helps. I mean...i am kinda wishing she'd realize it..cause i love her, but I guess if I spend my whole life trying to make her realize how aesome she is, and make her realize she should leave him and be happy then i won't be able to live MY LIFE happily. Thank you so much for what you said. I feel a little better. And Im glad your doing good also. Afterall, I know you have a great head on your shoulder!

[rivgrr]

Thanks baby=)
I'll be honest - it's not easy.. There are many days when I still try to reason with my mom and make her think like a "normal person", hoping she will snap out of this weird sense of priorities she has had forever... I just try not to let myself be surprised when it doesn't happen.. =/ And what you said is right.. you have to take care of yourself.. you are not supposed to be the mother here, remember...
xoxoxoxo

[rainbowgirlie]

:)
you still rock just as much as u ever did riv. :)