(Untitled)

[rainbowgirlie]

I don't know if anyone deals with depression, but it sucks, its not something you can control, and if you are like me and decide NOT to take those stupid pills that fuck you up in the end, for it, its REALLY to difficult to deal with. It affects the ones you love the most, and its just really hard. Along with OCD, and diabetes, man, its a shock i'm

Comments

[aryx]

Depression sucks.
I find when I get depressed, if I can figure out what is actually depressing me, it goes away. But, that probably doesn't work for severe cases.
I can e-mail you a nudie pic of me to get you giggling, if you think that'll help. ;)
Cheer up, sweetie! We all love ya!

[rainbowgirlie]

awww thanks hun! :) Ha Ha @ the nudie picture. U know sometimes I can understand why i'm depressed and sometimes the feeling is just THERE and wont go away. I dont usualy get like this that often just every now and then, it just so happens THIS time its been for like 3 days, and it su cks cause its usually not that long. Oh well its like and i will surive!!

[aryx]

I guess just the mention of sending a nudie pic got you going a bit!
:)

Well, I hope it goes away soon!

[beccavicious]

i get depressed when i get PMS :(.. no fun. all you need are a lot of hugs & a lot of drugs :P

*hug*

[rainbowgirlie]

yeah i was pmsing But I dont know if its that. I'm out of it now *THANK GOD!!* And I don't do drugs anymore...or drink or smoke...so I gotta just go get a punching bag to let out my anger I guess! :)

[beccavicious]

i use to play the drums.. i was so calm when i did that :P! but now i have nothing to beat up!

[rainbowgirlie]

ooh the drums. i tried and failed at those, i suck. i jus need a punching bag or umm...shoot....i got a new loveseat that might work! :)

[saraybe]

dear god you are not alone! i as well have OCD, along with depression and PTSD. ( Post Trumatic Stress Disorder ) i refuse to take meds! my father was a big pill popper back in the day and i had a few freinds that are the same way. i will not let myself get to that point. but i did try them once and it was evil i tell you! *sneezes* ( excuse me ) *sneezes again* DAMMIT! anyways...pardon my sneezes i am having some mad crazy allergies this morning. but you will not sink. i will not let you.

[saraybe]

by the way...your journal is now the #1 most bad ass one that i have ever seen. damn you! how can i get one like that??? *pouts*

[rainbowgirlie]

Hey girlie

[saraybe]

my OCD is getting better with time. i have strange things that i will never stop doing it cause of OCD. example, when i eat french fries i never eat the last part of them. i will eat them all the way down till just a small part of it is left and then i throw that part on the side. if i have a round piece of food infront of me i have to eat it in a cirlce. take one bite off then turn it in a circle and take the next bite off so forth and so off. i do things in a numbers of 3. i lock my car door 3 times before i get out of it. i wear 3 rings every day, etc. i also do some foods in numbers of 3. like i will only eat 3 cookies at a time in a circular fashion. or 3 chocolates at a time, etc. the meds did not help me at all. they made me into a zombie. i was at the mall one day i was just starting to take Zoloft and i blacked out in the store, fell on the CONCRET floor, busted my head up and i fell into a clothing rack some i have some scars from that on me. when i came to i was numb, and i was running a fever and my lips were

[rainbowgirlie]

OH girl....do I RELATE. Some of the ocd stuff I do i wont even tell people. I wake up and it starts. at work i have to stare at someone for like 10 seconds, then stop, then stare for 3 seconds, then 1 then stop. Numbers is a huge thing for me to. If i get blood drawn I have to touch the wound till it hurts, then stop.At night time, I have to check my alarm clock 3 times, then stop, then do it again, and if any sounds come on I have to do it all over. I ahve to check my birth control every night before I go to bed and put my cell phone on silent and watch the bars of energy go all the way up and when it hits silent i put it down on my couch. I have to make sure if theres glasses in the hallway that the cup is in the middle of the place, and I do all kinds of more wierd shit. NO one will understand it, im betting you do tho. I HATE it. Some of the stuff is really embarassing. ANd then I have to have people (like my boyfreind only) repeat stuff. LIke if I say i love you and he says i love you, i have to have him say it again, or whatever

[l3leugrrl]

I hated the pills they made me feel fake like a hollow shell on the inside and a fake plastic smile on the outside, I stopped taking them a little over a year ago, sometimes it gets so bad that I wish I was on the pills again but I dont ever want to be, I have come to terms with the fact that it is a part of me and I just have to deal with it no matter how down I get I just have to pull my sorry ass through it, Pills cant produce happiness you have to go out there and make it for yourself.

[rainbowgirlie]

YES! You said it JUST how I would have. I will NOT take pills anymore. They do create a plastic smile on the outside and emptiness on the inside. Its horrible. Your a zombie and not yourself....everyones turning to antidepressants in the world and not dealing with life. I'm makign myself deal with all the stuff I have wrong with me becaue I don't want to take pills. Good job girl, im glad your not on them either! :) *HUGS*

[l3leugrrl]

its good to know that there someone else out there like me who wants to pull through everything on their own without the help of silly pills ::HUGGLES::

[rainbowgirlie]

YES! Say NO TO PILLS!! :) LEts start a club !! :)