Washington DC American Idols Tour 2008
Well, I had to work all day Thursday, and so I missed out on pre-show shenanigans and autographs and whatnot, and I don't think I would have known where to go to do such things anyway. But I went to the show! And I took blurry pictures!
My recaps, let me show you them…
I got there a bit late because I had met a friend for dinner, and so I entered and stumbled over people to find my seat (which was actually a pretty good seat! Just above the floor seating) as Chikezie was performing, and let me tell you, the only thing I really remembered him from during the show was, of course, his bluegrass Beatles, but damn, he was good. I mean, the guy has a really smooth RnB voice, and I really liked that one Usher song he did. It's a shame he was first and sort of hustled out there, because I would have enjoyed hearing all of his set. My fault for being late!
Ramiele popped up next, and I don't know why she gets so much flak in the reviews for being listless and a crappy singer or whatever, because I liked her. She was tiny and sparkly and the screens behind her had this fun sparkly stuff and I am a sucker for the Jackson 5 and I quite liked her set. Plus, I've always thought she had a good voice. It must be hard to see reviews and get slammed when you're just trying your best.
Michael Goddamn Australian Johns was next, and he had quite an entrance, much more so than the previous performers. Of course, it helped that his first song was a damn stadium anthem played at every sporting event I've ever been to - high school, college, AND professional. AND IT WAS AWESOME, SHIT, SON, MICHAEL GODDAMN JOHNS. I pretty much was starry eyed his whole set, which I think most people who've seen the tour have been. I know the banter is mostly scripted, but I did think his "Dream On" introduction about not caring what Randy Jackson thinks was super cute. Plus I'm shallow, so, you know, YES PLEASE.
And then everyone's favorite girl to pick on, Kristy Lee. I don't know, she was okay. But the girls in front of me with Team Cook t-shirts on clearly were not there for her (ya think?) as they booed her when she came onstage. I felt that was rude, so I cheered. I cheered for everyone, actually. She mentioned that she and Carly! had visited the White House that day. Her voice sounded much higher than I remembered it sounding on TV. And damn is she skinny. But I didn't know her two country songs, mostly because it's not my preferred genre of music, but they were happy and upbeat and actually, I think I had heard the second country song "Cowgirls," before. And then there's "God Bless the USA." I can't stand this song. I find it pandering of the worst order. Whenever it's on the radio, I change the channel. But, I mean, I work right next to the Veterans of Foreign Wars building and am near the Pentagon and it’s like, military central here and GODDAMNIT, KRISTY LEE COOK, WHY DID YOU MOVE ME DURING THAT SONG? Ahem. Moving on.
CARLY, LIGHT OF MY LIFE. Her voice was actually a lot higher than I remembered it to be as well, more like the studio "Come Together" version. We all know she sings "Bring Me to Life," first, and it was flipping amazing, like, I WILL LET YOU HAVE ME amazing. I don't know, what else can you really say about these concerts? Everyone has either seen them or watched the YouTube versions and we all know what the songs are, so here's a beautiful picture of my Carly to make up for my lack of insight and creativity. But seriously, best damn voice, so much love.
Then Brooke, who made me almost tear up with her rendition of "Let it Be." I totally cried when she did it on the show too, and I would have this time, only some woman with kids was behind me and was like, drunken singing along although I don't think she was drunk, just really obnoxious, and the dad sitting next to me turned around and told her to stfu because nobody was there to hear her fat ass. But I paraphrase. It made her shut up, though. Brooke's version of "Yellow," was also fantastic, just, amazing. I already liked the song when Coldplay did it, but she brought a richness to it, a more melodic and hopeful feel than Coldplay did, if that makes any sense. I was also easily swayed by the sparkly yellow star background on the screens. She also mentioned (along with like, everyone else) that their drummer was from DC and then she mentioned the Wizards *crickets chirped* and then the Redskins *cheers* I screamed out "THE NATS," but of course she didn't hear me. Oh Brooke, why are you so effervescent?
It was smart to have Brooke introduce the group number, because, while it made sense for her to since she was the last to perform before it, she also has the kind of demeanor needed to pull off the gravity of the real meaning of Idol Gives Back. I actually really loved the harmonies the girls were doing throughout the song. I know the girls got a lot of crap this year for not being as good as the boys, but I think they really held their own and I think it's a load of bunk, personally. And then of course, Mr. Michael Johns! I love how he gets his own intro and everything, like he's the American Idol of the Bottom Half of the Top Ten. And then, of course, precious Marly. It was a lovely group number, I don't really know what else to say about it.
And then the intermission and dancing Pop-Tarts and this cute segment that I would assume happens every concert where the MC picks two kids out of the audience to duke it out Air Guitar Hero style. At our concert he picked this precious little 6 year old boy who was so shy and sweet and barely said two words and didn't know how to "hold" an air guitar and this brash little 9 year old lad who I think threw up some devil horns and headbanged and air guitared for all he was worth. IT WAS THE FINAL TWO ALL OVER AGAIN, FOLKS. Super cute.
Ladies and Gentlemen, Jason Castro! His whole set was super mellow and like, I don't know I kept thinking coffee shop or tiki hut, but whatever works for him, you know? It was pleasant, and he used a lot of falsetto, if I remember correctly, which he should, because he sounded lovely and choirboy with the higher notes. I have also never heard that rendition of "Crazy" before, and I quite liked it. He was sort of like a marshmallow to me, though, pleasant and sweet and wonderful in large doses without being filling. But he's not a bad singer at all; I thought he was really good, just not quite as WOO YEAH as everyone else.
Syesha was next, and I'm sorry, but whoever thinks she should not have been Top 3 should listen again, because that girl has some damn powerful pipes. I loved "Umbrella," I swear, it was one of my top performances of the evening. It had punch and she worked the stairs and it was playful and I just really liked it. The other songs were slower, and I'm not a huge fan of either Alicia Keyes or Beyonce, but Syesha did a damn good job on both their songs. Damn good. You could tell she was just singing her heart out and really believed in what she was singing. However, her onstage banter needs some work. She was a little stilted and cold, but her powerful vocals made up for that for me.
And then my friend, who I had called during intermission and not been able to talk to, calls me back. RIGHT AS DAVID IS BEING RAISED ONTO THE STAGE PLAYING HIS PIANO AND BEING WONDERFUL. So I said fuck that and totally ignored my phone, because really, only my friend would call at the most critical moment, Jesus H Tapdancing Christ. Right, David. He was amazing. I cannot believe a voice that absofuckinglutely powerful and amazing and big is in a freaking 17 year old. HOW DOES THAT EVEN HAPPEN? I don't know. He was amazing. "Apologize" is one of my current favorite songs, and he killed it, of course. It was so precious, he went to fix his mic on the stand and he totally screwed up and was redoing it and was laughing and goshing all over the place. And of course, "Stand By Me" is one of my very favorite songs and so I videotaped him doing it, and as soon as I figure out how to convert my videos I take on my camera into a format where I can actually hear them, I will have precious Davidy memories. And then he fucking goes and sings Josh Groban because it's one of his "message songs" (complete with air quotes, WHY SO LAME, MY HEART OF HEARTS?) and Josh Groban is one of those voices that is so fucking amazing that you don't even care if it's all religious music and you don't like religious music because he's Just That Good. And so is David. Josh Groban V 2.0, VERSION AMAZING. And then he went and gushed over Cook like, really gushing and goshing and I know he does it at all the concerts but he just rambles on about how amazing Cook is and it's really just adorable.
And then, folks, David Cook, your American Idol. His "Hello" I liked, but I was kind of mesmerized by the floaty circles/Dark Side of the Moon/The Ring background on the big screen behind him. Then he thanked us, "The District! Of! Columbia!" for coming to the show. He was, as has been noted everywhere, wearing the suit because he went to the Senate to discuss cancer research, and I am still totally bitter because I work there and there was nothing to even suggest his ass was tramping around Capitol Hill. Damn hell ass bitch and I'm over it. He mentioned how he had been getting a lot of crap for his initials being DC all day and he just "wasn't having any of that." He also said he knows we're used to seeing him in his BAD t-shirt, but he had the suit on because he was making a Very Special Announcement: he was running for President. It was cute, he got some chuckles. He also mimicked Clinton's "That depends on what your meaning of the word 'is,' is." It was sort of precious. He fucking RACED through "Time of my Life," like, seriously, take the version that's on the radio and speed it up to double-time and that's how fast he sang it. I mean, it's not a horrible song, it's got a good message, aside from the magic rainbows, but he was like the Micro Machines guy with that thing. He looked paaaaaaaained. Poor dude. Then he sang "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing," and usually that's a song that when I hear it, I initially like it, but about halfway into the song I'm like, damn it, isn't this POS done yet? But David made the whole thing appealing, and I suspect it is because his suit had magic powers. He then tore into "My Hero," and anyone who knows me knows I love the Foo Fighters, even more so because Dave Grohl's mom was a substitute teacher at my high school all those years ago, and I was up and dancing and singing and just plain obnoxious, even more so than I think I can be normally. But hot damn, that was The Performance of the Night, ladies and gentlemen. FANFUCKINGTASTIC. Shit, I'd go to another concert just to hear that again, it was so damn good. I think this was the number where he did a mini backbend, but it all blurs a little. Then of course, he encores with "Billie Jean," and I have to say, I prefer the Michael Jackson version. Sorry, David! It's not his arrangement, so whatever, he sang the hell out of it and was pretty smoking doing it, so kudos to David.
Everyone's favorite finale, Please Don't Stop the Mavid, did not disappoint. I think there were mic issues with a lot of the Idols, because the first couple of notes from each Idol's solo seemed to be dropped. But that was utterly irrelevant. The Mavid in DC dance was some sort of castanets clicking thing followed by David being El Toro and Michael being a toreador. Sadly, lime green matador pants were not involved. So who's going to remake Carmen with CarmDavid and Micamilio? RIP OFF HEY ARNOLD, IT'S OKAY! I was videotaping it and then I realized I was missing actually watching the dance while I taped and so my tape goes *Michael waves a flag and David's got his little horns up, it veers off into nothingness and then you see David charge him and then it ends* And then at the end the Davids come forward to acknowledge each other and Cook does his sweeping bow to David, and this is precious, David kind of hoists Cook up by the scruff of his neck and Cook pops up and I went awww and flailed, because that's what I do.
Afterwards I circled and circled to find the least crowded bathroom and then I went and called my friend back. I'm looping the halls of the Verizon Center talking and who do I see talking on the phone? Dadchuleta. He's kind of small. He had the ubiquitous cap on and everything. I sort of did a double take and this lame point thing like, WTFMATE? and I think he saw me, so now I can be Crazy Pointing Girl. Then, the security people come up to me and order me (and other people milling around!) to get out (leave!) right now. It was indeed the end of you and me, Dadchuleta. I was totally freaked out and hung up on my friend because I am the Good One. The one that bails people out of jail, not the one that goes there. But then again, the staff at the Verizon Center are notorious for having holly bushes stuck up their asses. Seriously, if any of them ever enjoyed life, I think they would die. I went to a basketball game once at the Verizon Center back when the Wizards were still the Bullets and I bet they were dicks then, too. And then I went home.
My story does not include fun Meeting the Idols stories. I didn't go backstage, I didn't get party passes for anything, and I didn't wait at the buses, but I had a damn good time. And if you haven't gone to your tour stop yet, when you do go? I hope you have a damn good time too. Perhaps even... wait for it… the time of your life.
Oh God, get the hook.
My recaps, let me show you them…
I got there a bit late because I had met a friend for dinner, and so I entered and stumbled over people to find my seat (which was actually a pretty good seat! Just above the floor seating) as Chikezie was performing, and let me tell you, the only thing I really remembered him from during the show was, of course, his bluegrass Beatles, but damn, he was good. I mean, the guy has a really smooth RnB voice, and I really liked that one Usher song he did. It's a shame he was first and sort of hustled out there, because I would have enjoyed hearing all of his set. My fault for being late!
Ramiele popped up next, and I don't know why she gets so much flak in the reviews for being listless and a crappy singer or whatever, because I liked her. She was tiny and sparkly and the screens behind her had this fun sparkly stuff and I am a sucker for the Jackson 5 and I quite liked her set. Plus, I've always thought she had a good voice. It must be hard to see reviews and get slammed when you're just trying your best.
Michael Goddamn Australian Johns was next, and he had quite an entrance, much more so than the previous performers. Of course, it helped that his first song was a damn stadium anthem played at every sporting event I've ever been to - high school, college, AND professional. AND IT WAS AWESOME, SHIT, SON, MICHAEL GODDAMN JOHNS. I pretty much was starry eyed his whole set, which I think most people who've seen the tour have been. I know the banter is mostly scripted, but I did think his "Dream On" introduction about not caring what Randy Jackson thinks was super cute. Plus I'm shallow, so, you know, YES PLEASE.
And then everyone's favorite girl to pick on, Kristy Lee. I don't know, she was okay. But the girls in front of me with Team Cook t-shirts on clearly were not there for her (ya think?) as they booed her when she came onstage. I felt that was rude, so I cheered. I cheered for everyone, actually. She mentioned that she and Carly! had visited the White House that day. Her voice sounded much higher than I remembered it sounding on TV. And damn is she skinny. But I didn't know her two country songs, mostly because it's not my preferred genre of music, but they were happy and upbeat and actually, I think I had heard the second country song "Cowgirls," before. And then there's "God Bless the USA." I can't stand this song. I find it pandering of the worst order. Whenever it's on the radio, I change the channel. But, I mean, I work right next to the Veterans of Foreign Wars building and am near the Pentagon and it’s like, military central here and GODDAMNIT, KRISTY LEE COOK, WHY DID YOU MOVE ME DURING THAT SONG? Ahem. Moving on.
CARLY, LIGHT OF MY LIFE. Her voice was actually a lot higher than I remembered it to be as well, more like the studio "Come Together" version. We all know she sings "Bring Me to Life," first, and it was flipping amazing, like, I WILL LET YOU HAVE ME amazing. I don't know, what else can you really say about these concerts? Everyone has either seen them or watched the YouTube versions and we all know what the songs are, so here's a beautiful picture of my Carly to make up for my lack of insight and creativity. But seriously, best damn voice, so much love.
Then Brooke, who made me almost tear up with her rendition of "Let it Be." I totally cried when she did it on the show too, and I would have this time, only some woman with kids was behind me and was like, drunken singing along although I don't think she was drunk, just really obnoxious, and the dad sitting next to me turned around and told her to stfu because nobody was there to hear her fat ass. But I paraphrase. It made her shut up, though. Brooke's version of "Yellow," was also fantastic, just, amazing. I already liked the song when Coldplay did it, but she brought a richness to it, a more melodic and hopeful feel than Coldplay did, if that makes any sense. I was also easily swayed by the sparkly yellow star background on the screens. She also mentioned (along with like, everyone else) that their drummer was from DC and then she mentioned the Wizards *crickets chirped* and then the Redskins *cheers* I screamed out "THE NATS," but of course she didn't hear me. Oh Brooke, why are you so effervescent?
It was smart to have Brooke introduce the group number, because, while it made sense for her to since she was the last to perform before it, she also has the kind of demeanor needed to pull off the gravity of the real meaning of Idol Gives Back. I actually really loved the harmonies the girls were doing throughout the song. I know the girls got a lot of crap this year for not being as good as the boys, but I think they really held their own and I think it's a load of bunk, personally. And then of course, Mr. Michael Johns! I love how he gets his own intro and everything, like he's the American Idol of the Bottom Half of the Top Ten. And then, of course, precious Marly. It was a lovely group number, I don't really know what else to say about it.
And then the intermission and dancing Pop-Tarts and this cute segment that I would assume happens every concert where the MC picks two kids out of the audience to duke it out Air Guitar Hero style. At our concert he picked this precious little 6 year old boy who was so shy and sweet and barely said two words and didn't know how to "hold" an air guitar and this brash little 9 year old lad who I think threw up some devil horns and headbanged and air guitared for all he was worth. IT WAS THE FINAL TWO ALL OVER AGAIN, FOLKS. Super cute.
Ladies and Gentlemen, Jason Castro! His whole set was super mellow and like, I don't know I kept thinking coffee shop or tiki hut, but whatever works for him, you know? It was pleasant, and he used a lot of falsetto, if I remember correctly, which he should, because he sounded lovely and choirboy with the higher notes. I have also never heard that rendition of "Crazy" before, and I quite liked it. He was sort of like a marshmallow to me, though, pleasant and sweet and wonderful in large doses without being filling. But he's not a bad singer at all; I thought he was really good, just not quite as WOO YEAH as everyone else.
Syesha was next, and I'm sorry, but whoever thinks she should not have been Top 3 should listen again, because that girl has some damn powerful pipes. I loved "Umbrella," I swear, it was one of my top performances of the evening. It had punch and she worked the stairs and it was playful and I just really liked it. The other songs were slower, and I'm not a huge fan of either Alicia Keyes or Beyonce, but Syesha did a damn good job on both their songs. Damn good. You could tell she was just singing her heart out and really believed in what she was singing. However, her onstage banter needs some work. She was a little stilted and cold, but her powerful vocals made up for that for me.
And then my friend, who I had called during intermission and not been able to talk to, calls me back. RIGHT AS DAVID IS BEING RAISED ONTO THE STAGE PLAYING HIS PIANO AND BEING WONDERFUL. So I said fuck that and totally ignored my phone, because really, only my friend would call at the most critical moment, Jesus H Tapdancing Christ. Right, David. He was amazing. I cannot believe a voice that absofuckinglutely powerful and amazing and big is in a freaking 17 year old. HOW DOES THAT EVEN HAPPEN? I don't know. He was amazing. "Apologize" is one of my current favorite songs, and he killed it, of course. It was so precious, he went to fix his mic on the stand and he totally screwed up and was redoing it and was laughing and goshing all over the place. And of course, "Stand By Me" is one of my very favorite songs and so I videotaped him doing it, and as soon as I figure out how to convert my videos I take on my camera into a format where I can actually hear them, I will have precious Davidy memories. And then he fucking goes and sings Josh Groban because it's one of his "message songs" (complete with air quotes, WHY SO LAME, MY HEART OF HEARTS?) and Josh Groban is one of those voices that is so fucking amazing that you don't even care if it's all religious music and you don't like religious music because he's Just That Good. And so is David. Josh Groban V 2.0, VERSION AMAZING. And then he went and gushed over Cook like, really gushing and goshing and I know he does it at all the concerts but he just rambles on about how amazing Cook is and it's really just adorable.
And then, folks, David Cook, your American Idol. His "Hello" I liked, but I was kind of mesmerized by the floaty circles/Dark Side of the Moon/The Ring background on the big screen behind him. Then he thanked us, "The District! Of! Columbia!" for coming to the show. He was, as has been noted everywhere, wearing the suit because he went to the Senate to discuss cancer research, and I am still totally bitter because I work there and there was nothing to even suggest his ass was tramping around Capitol Hill. Damn hell ass bitch and I'm over it. He mentioned how he had been getting a lot of crap for his initials being DC all day and he just "wasn't having any of that." He also said he knows we're used to seeing him in his BAD t-shirt, but he had the suit on because he was making a Very Special Announcement: he was running for President. It was cute, he got some chuckles. He also mimicked Clinton's "That depends on what your meaning of the word 'is,' is." It was sort of precious. He fucking RACED through "Time of my Life," like, seriously, take the version that's on the radio and speed it up to double-time and that's how fast he sang it. I mean, it's not a horrible song, it's got a good message, aside from the magic rainbows, but he was like the Micro Machines guy with that thing. He looked paaaaaaaained. Poor dude. Then he sang "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing," and usually that's a song that when I hear it, I initially like it, but about halfway into the song I'm like, damn it, isn't this POS done yet? But David made the whole thing appealing, and I suspect it is because his suit had magic powers. He then tore into "My Hero," and anyone who knows me knows I love the Foo Fighters, even more so because Dave Grohl's mom was a substitute teacher at my high school all those years ago, and I was up and dancing and singing and just plain obnoxious, even more so than I think I can be normally. But hot damn, that was The Performance of the Night, ladies and gentlemen. FANFUCKINGTASTIC. Shit, I'd go to another concert just to hear that again, it was so damn good. I think this was the number where he did a mini backbend, but it all blurs a little. Then of course, he encores with "Billie Jean," and I have to say, I prefer the Michael Jackson version. Sorry, David! It's not his arrangement, so whatever, he sang the hell out of it and was pretty smoking doing it, so kudos to David.
Everyone's favorite finale, Please Don't Stop the Mavid, did not disappoint. I think there were mic issues with a lot of the Idols, because the first couple of notes from each Idol's solo seemed to be dropped. But that was utterly irrelevant. The Mavid in DC dance was some sort of castanets clicking thing followed by David being El Toro and Michael being a toreador. Sadly, lime green matador pants were not involved. So who's going to remake Carmen with CarmDavid and Micamilio? RIP OFF HEY ARNOLD, IT'S OKAY! I was videotaping it and then I realized I was missing actually watching the dance while I taped and so my tape goes *Michael waves a flag and David's got his little horns up, it veers off into nothingness and then you see David charge him and then it ends* And then at the end the Davids come forward to acknowledge each other and Cook does his sweeping bow to David, and this is precious, David kind of hoists Cook up by the scruff of his neck and Cook pops up and I went awww and flailed, because that's what I do.
Afterwards I circled and circled to find the least crowded bathroom and then I went and called my friend back. I'm looping the halls of the Verizon Center talking and who do I see talking on the phone? Dadchuleta. He's kind of small. He had the ubiquitous cap on and everything. I sort of did a double take and this lame point thing like, WTFMATE? and I think he saw me, so now I can be Crazy Pointing Girl. Then, the security people come up to me and order me (and other people milling around!) to get out (leave!) right now. It was indeed the end of you and me, Dadchuleta. I was totally freaked out and hung up on my friend because I am the Good One. The one that bails people out of jail, not the one that goes there. But then again, the staff at the Verizon Center are notorious for having holly bushes stuck up their asses. Seriously, if any of them ever enjoyed life, I think they would die. I went to a basketball game once at the Verizon Center back when the Wizards were still the Bullets and I bet they were dicks then, too. And then I went home.
My story does not include fun Meeting the Idols stories. I didn't go backstage, I didn't get party passes for anything, and I didn't wait at the buses, but I had a damn good time. And if you haven't gone to your tour stop yet, when you do go? I hope you have a damn good time too. Perhaps even... wait for it… the time of your life.
Oh God, get the hook.