(no subject)
My time has flown by since my last entry in March. So much stuff has happened. Good & Bad. I am now officially past my 20's. Had a great party to celebrate that, not to mention all the love and beautiful flowers and I recieved <3
My family has been dropping like flies.. I've lost a family member every month of 2013 so far. Crazy huh? Granted I was not close to all of them. One of them, i hardly would count him as family.. and his passing, well it doesn't mean so much, the world is a better place withouth him, and I really don't feel bad for saying that.
Really only two that I was close with and have/will mourn deeply ... my Aunt that died in January, and than the latest which was totally unexpected and caught me off guard; her brother, my great uncle. We were just up to visit him in New Brunswick, just after I saw Bob Saget, we went up there for Easter. Had a time, so many laughs....So when I got home from work, Wed before last, it tore a little bit of my heart out hearing that he had died, suddenly, unexpectedly. I drove up to Nb on that Friday and stayed until Sunday with mom, Shawn and my aunt Cathy. It was heart breaking to see his girls. They are strong though, I'm so glad that I could be there for them. I can't imagine losing my parents, the thought scares the shit out of me. His youngest daughter is only a year older than me. I don't think I will be able to keep it together when the time comes.The good thing about times like these is getting to reconnect with family that I haven't seen in soo long. Even met some news one, who turned out more wonderful than I expected. That part was lovely. We mourned, and we told stories and we laughed, and we were mad together that he left so quickly.
Enough talking about that, I've been on an emotional roller coaster ever since I got back from the funeral.My head was not in a good place last week.. I am hoping this week will be much better.. I should also mention that the day I was driving up to the funeral, I found out that my little 18 year old cousin, tried to commit suicide. She tried to OD on prescription pills :( She was finally diagnosed last week with borderline personality disorder and is doing much better thankfully.. When I did some reading up on BPD though, I was the one who got a shock... the symptoms and the actions of people that have this, well I can identify a great deal with them. Much of my past behaviour touches on most of what was described. That threw me off guard. I mean I have always known that I do not feel or talk or think like most people.. but for the most part I have always kept everything in side of me. To read an article that pretty much described me to a T..well that was not only enlightening..but also scary as hell in a way. I think It will be best if I get some counselling again. Until I can afford real therapy lol
I haven't been officially diagnosed yet, but it appears that I have some type of arthritis. I've had bloodwork, x rays, more blood work, more x rays.. I have an appointment with a rheumatoid specialist in July. I don't match all the symptoms of rheumatoid, but my levels in my blood are way higher than that of a normal person.. and starting in March I've had some unbelievable pain. Thankfully it's not constant, and so since my first experience, I have been trying to improve myself, taking better care of myself.
I started seeing a chiropractor in April, we've been working on posture, & since I've started to see him, I haven't had any headaches *(yay! i used to get them, pretty much every day) After I finished up with him, I am now seeing a physio therapist at the same office who is helping me work on strengthening muscles in my legs that will help take the pressure of my knees ( my knees have been what have been the worst, one day it took me almost 7 minutes to walk down the stairs at my house..it hurt so bad) I'm trying to avoid a daily medicine, because I really don't like the idea of my body becoming used to something like that. Since I don't have pain every day now, especially.
So I try to only take them on my bad days, which thankfully I haven't had one in weeks now!
I did something pretty cool this weekend that I am pretty proud of. I entered my first marathon. I just walked 5k, but it was a good start to introduce me to it. I loved the atmosphere! The walk itself made me feel incredible! I look forward to doing many more :)
I also ordered hip hop abs from the beach body collection. I started that on Saturday, so far so good. Trying to strengthen my core, which in turn will help my posture and take pressure of my knees. yay for taking care of myself!
Looks like something epic will be happening this week. Something that I have been dreaming of for years, I don't want to spoil it or ruin the surprise, or even get to excited, just in case something happens and it doesn't work out...already I'm nervous and so excited...and will hopefully be able to give you some details in the very near future... eeeek!! ;)
There's some other stuff that I need to get off my chest, but since I am at work, I should probably do some work lol Ive been here for an hour and 13 mins, and basically all I've accomplished is writing this entry..lol.. Work though, that's a whole other issue in my life that i'm not sure what's going to happen.... I'll save that for another time.
...until next time..[ keep fit and have fun] haha
Life is to short so stay happy, have fun, tell the people you love, that you love them, because you never know what can happen, and you never know when you might not have the chance.
<3 <3 you all.
*~ Rainy ~*
My family has been dropping like flies.. I've lost a family member every month of 2013 so far. Crazy huh? Granted I was not close to all of them. One of them, i hardly would count him as family.. and his passing, well it doesn't mean so much, the world is a better place withouth him, and I really don't feel bad for saying that.
Really only two that I was close with and have/will mourn deeply ... my Aunt that died in January, and than the latest which was totally unexpected and caught me off guard; her brother, my great uncle. We were just up to visit him in New Brunswick, just after I saw Bob Saget, we went up there for Easter. Had a time, so many laughs....So when I got home from work, Wed before last, it tore a little bit of my heart out hearing that he had died, suddenly, unexpectedly. I drove up to Nb on that Friday and stayed until Sunday with mom, Shawn and my aunt Cathy. It was heart breaking to see his girls. They are strong though, I'm so glad that I could be there for them. I can't imagine losing my parents, the thought scares the shit out of me. His youngest daughter is only a year older than me. I don't think I will be able to keep it together when the time comes.The good thing about times like these is getting to reconnect with family that I haven't seen in soo long. Even met some news one, who turned out more wonderful than I expected. That part was lovely. We mourned, and we told stories and we laughed, and we were mad together that he left so quickly.
Enough talking about that, I've been on an emotional roller coaster ever since I got back from the funeral.My head was not in a good place last week.. I am hoping this week will be much better.. I should also mention that the day I was driving up to the funeral, I found out that my little 18 year old cousin, tried to commit suicide. She tried to OD on prescription pills :( She was finally diagnosed last week with borderline personality disorder and is doing much better thankfully.. When I did some reading up on BPD though, I was the one who got a shock... the symptoms and the actions of people that have this, well I can identify a great deal with them. Much of my past behaviour touches on most of what was described. That threw me off guard. I mean I have always known that I do not feel or talk or think like most people.. but for the most part I have always kept everything in side of me. To read an article that pretty much described me to a T..well that was not only enlightening..but also scary as hell in a way. I think It will be best if I get some counselling again. Until I can afford real therapy lol
I haven't been officially diagnosed yet, but it appears that I have some type of arthritis. I've had bloodwork, x rays, more blood work, more x rays.. I have an appointment with a rheumatoid specialist in July. I don't match all the symptoms of rheumatoid, but my levels in my blood are way higher than that of a normal person.. and starting in March I've had some unbelievable pain. Thankfully it's not constant, and so since my first experience, I have been trying to improve myself, taking better care of myself.
I started seeing a chiropractor in April, we've been working on posture, & since I've started to see him, I haven't had any headaches *(yay! i used to get them, pretty much every day) After I finished up with him, I am now seeing a physio therapist at the same office who is helping me work on strengthening muscles in my legs that will help take the pressure of my knees ( my knees have been what have been the worst, one day it took me almost 7 minutes to walk down the stairs at my house..it hurt so bad) I'm trying to avoid a daily medicine, because I really don't like the idea of my body becoming used to something like that. Since I don't have pain every day now, especially.
So I try to only take them on my bad days, which thankfully I haven't had one in weeks now!
I did something pretty cool this weekend that I am pretty proud of. I entered my first marathon. I just walked 5k, but it was a good start to introduce me to it. I loved the atmosphere! The walk itself made me feel incredible! I look forward to doing many more :)
I also ordered hip hop abs from the beach body collection. I started that on Saturday, so far so good. Trying to strengthen my core, which in turn will help my posture and take pressure of my knees. yay for taking care of myself!
Looks like something epic will be happening this week. Something that I have been dreaming of for years, I don't want to spoil it or ruin the surprise, or even get to excited, just in case something happens and it doesn't work out...already I'm nervous and so excited...and will hopefully be able to give you some details in the very near future... eeeek!! ;)
There's some other stuff that I need to get off my chest, but since I am at work, I should probably do some work lol Ive been here for an hour and 13 mins, and basically all I've accomplished is writing this entry..lol.. Work though, that's a whole other issue in my life that i'm not sure what's going to happen.... I'll save that for another time.
...until next time..[ keep fit and have fun] haha
Life is to short so stay happy, have fun, tell the people you love, that you love them, because you never know what can happen, and you never know when you might not have the chance.
<3 <3 you all.
*~ Rainy ~*