Had dinner with the Shiny Brain and he commented that he thinks I am ambitious. And I was surprised that he thinks this. And he was surprised that I was surprised. So, I am processing this
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on perfection and other noble pursuitsrandirApril 4 2010, 18:43:49 UTC
Hmmm. So, the construct proposed is that ambition contains not only money and power motives, but also accomplishment and achievement. Let me chew on this a little with you, if you don't mind
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Re: on perfection and other noble pursuitsrandirApril 9 2010, 00:11:36 UTC
I like the Greek conception of the word "perfect" in that it contains the concepts of "whole" and "complete". And I often frame the pursuit of excellence as a journey of completion.
I think perhaps a better word than "ambitious" would be "driven." I am driven to Become by Being. In my own life, I strive to be driven by choice alone, and not by reactionary pain. I do not always succeed at this, but I have improved over time and am now in the 90% range.
Thank you for sharing your process is such an undefended way. It helps me to explore the frame of my own constructed realities.
Ambition that measures itself purely in financial terms is pretty shallow. All you have to do in this economy to make lots of money, is shut off your conscience and turn up the avarice.
This guy doesn't have to understand your idealism in order to understand that you are hungry for something. It doesn't matter-from his end- what it is you're hungry for. The hunger itself registers as ambition.
If you are worried that he's shallow, find out from him what he thinks your goals really are, what it is you're ambitious about.
on motive and hungerrandirApril 4 2010, 18:56:56 UTC
So perhaps I have judged his statement unfairly without fully exploring his intended meaning. Thank you, Anansi, for this clarity. It is very helpful.
I am not worried that he's shallow. His mind has many layers of beautiful meaning.
In the conversation, we were discussing the pain of losing a relationship and the process of extricating oneself emotionally from said relationship while trying to deal with the grief and other meanings of those acts. And I commented that one of the things that had been hard for me in my own process was having to accept that I had failed. He responded by saying that was because I am ambitious. And I replied that while I might seem ambitious professionally, I am not ambitious personally. I grieved that my love failed to reach someone who had been so dear to me for so long. I did not grieve what others might think of me because my relationship "failed."
But he didn't know that of me because I hadn't shown him. So, I don't bear him any ill-regard for saying it. I'm just pondering it.
lately I've been pondering the difference between a mistake and a failure. Mistakes seem more easily forgiven, maybe because there hasn't been a judgment about it. A lot of my failures could be downgraded to mistakes, if I were less critical.
A failed relationship could be just a mistake, but only if there were no regrets.
Yes, I do understand the difference. And there were many mistakes made within the relationship on both sides. But the relationship itself was not a mistake. The demise of it was a choice on my Wusband's part. And the failure I felt was that I failed to matter enough to him for him to make a different choice.
You have ambition to take the crisis-unit to a screaming success. You have ambition to move the world in some positive way and leave it better than you found it.
What I don't see is you having ambition to elevate yourself at the cost of others. Which has been my (limited) experience of how the word is used.
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I think perhaps a better word than "ambitious" would be "driven." I am driven to Become by Being. In my own life, I strive to be driven by choice alone, and not by reactionary pain. I do not always succeed at this, but I have improved over time and am now in the 90% range.
Thank you for sharing your process is such an undefended way. It helps me to explore the frame of my own constructed realities.
--Randir
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This guy doesn't have to understand your idealism in order to understand that you are hungry for something. It doesn't matter-from his end- what it is you're hungry for. The hunger itself registers as ambition.
If you are worried that he's shallow, find out from him what he thinks your goals really are, what it is you're ambitious about.
Reply
I am not worried that he's shallow. His mind has many layers of beautiful meaning.
In the conversation, we were discussing the pain of losing a relationship and the process of extricating oneself emotionally from said relationship while trying to deal with the grief and other meanings of those acts. And I commented that one of the things that had been hard for me in my own process was having to accept that I had failed. He responded by saying that was because I am ambitious. And I replied that while I might seem ambitious professionally, I am not ambitious personally. I grieved that my love failed to reach someone who had been so dear to me for so long. I did not grieve what others might think of me because my relationship "failed."
But he didn't know that of me because I hadn't shown him. So, I don't bear him any ill-regard for saying it. I'm just pondering it.
--Randir
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A failed relationship could be just a mistake, but only if there were no regrets.
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--Randir
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You have ambition to take the crisis-unit to a screaming success.
You have ambition to move the world in some positive way and leave it better than you found it.
What I don't see is you having ambition to elevate yourself at the cost of others. Which has been my (limited) experience of how the word is used.
my 2 Lira,
Ulesegisa
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--Randir
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ambition..?
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