i want to spin ( Read more... )

wow. 3 shots of grand marnier (80 proof), plus a risperdal (to help me sleep) ... all on an empty stomach = rikki being a very fucked up girl with numb lips (haha, katie ( Read more... )

OMG. I am going to look at this place tomorrow...I get off of work really early tomorrow (I work 9-5), and wanted to do something, but everyone is busy, so instead I am looking at an apartment and then facing a 2 1/2 hour bus ride back to my house. Needless to say, that is NOT how I wanted my evening to go. *tear ( Read more... )

Tomorrow morning I go to the DMV to get a duplicate of my license (I've been using my passport as ID for the past 2 months, but I really need my license back, especially for if I ever get my insurance back), and I've been postponing it for various reasons (I wanted to wait to get my braces off because I need to take a new picture), but the time is ( Read more... )

I had forgotten how awful the despair that accompanies depression feels. Lately I've been existing in this mostly-functional state. Things haven't been great, but I've been going to work every day, and getting by. There have even been days when I was happy. But suddenly, I'm falling. Drinking, drugs, smoking, food, pain...it's all just a smoke ( Read more... )

Fuck. This whole "let's pack my entire LIFE into boxes so that I can move" thing isn't going so well...like it has barely even started. And I need to be DONE way before Dec. 3 so that I can move all of the crap into a self-storage place...one which I still need to FIND ( Read more... )

As soon as my parents went to bed tonight, I went and drank some of the tequila stored in our liquor cabinet. A few minutes after that, I felt "liquid fire" it my belly. Fun times. Except, you know, for the whole drinking alone thing. Today SO did not go the way I wanted it to. I just watched TV all day. But still, why did I let the disappointment ( Read more... )

You know, it's so weird. I had just been thinking about how maybe I was finally ready to get the tattoo on my right wrist (to cover the scars). I am so tired of wearing a wristband - I've been wearing one every day since February. I have the worst tan line from it. And it was a really positive step, because getting the tattoo meant that I was ( Read more... )

Eeeeeeek. I am about to go vote...for the first time ever ( Read more... )

Shit. How did it get so late?