I'm Gonna Say that this is Still June 17 BECAUSE....
...until my dysfunctional ass self allows me to go through the pitiful motions of sleep, dream, and wake, it is not yet the 18th of June, WHICH, as you all know, is Father's Day and Paul McCartney's birthday and Ms. Wipff's birthday and the birthday of a small Chihuahua named Tiotihuacal.
Whoooooooo!
I adore a television program from the nineties called Dr. Katz, Professional Therapist. Most of you should know what I'm talking about. For those of you who are not in the know, you are a tennis shoe. Go run a lap around the track and watch HGTV shows until you feel a great urge to plant a hibiscus in your garden.
If you give an echidna a hibiscus...
"An Alphabet" is my fave John Lennon short story thus far. Why? Because...because...because "A is for Parrot which we can plainly see, B is for glasses which we can plainly see, C is for plastic which we can plainly see, and D is for Doris." And there are roughly 22 other such letters in the English alphabet.
Right. I think I shall now drug myself so that there will be sleep. ~takes melatonin~ ~is not sleepy~
Pineapples are angry fruit. I was cutting one today, and as I was shucking it from its skin, I realized, 'This is the angriest fruit I have ever seen.' Just look at pineapples when you're next in store. They all seem to say, 'Come any closer, and I will scowl at your visage, which is most unpleasant to look at, you hopelessly backwards trollop!' And some pineapples are bi-lingual, so they say that also in Portuguese, which would be 'Venho mais perto, e eu scowl em seu visage, que da vontade é o mais desagradável olhar, você impossìvel para trás trollop!' And heaven forbid you get stuck with a tri-lingual pineapple, cause then it'll be all, 'Kom om het even welke dichter, en ik zal scowl bij uw visage, die het onplezierigst om is te bekijken, u hopeloos achteruit trollop!'
There is no word in the Portuguese language or the mystery language for either visage or trollop. As it turns out, the words are a French and English invention, respectively.
Did you know?
I feel bad for my pineapple that I cut into so many delicious chunks. It was really unhappy about it's state in life. It was beaten when it was a child.
1. Why not be a penguin? It is after all June, and you can have a tea party!
2. I seem to have found my mother's American Express Card sitting on the table next to me.
3. Bovine Spongioform Encealopathy. It can happen to you.
4. Hey Jude, don't make It mad...for It is stra-ange, and may be a rare disease...
5. I seem to have purchased an insane amount of soda over the Internet using my mother's credit card (I just have to share it with her when it gets here).
6. Dona Nobis Pacem, et Salvi Nos de ultima, et salva nos ten um.
7. My earrings look like orange sherbert.
8. One day, Alexa will want a sugar cube. And then she'll be sad, because she'll have forgotten where it is.
9. Oops.
9.5. Something insanely important that I can't tell you right now because I am silly...
10. Have a great summer!!! Love, nuns.
Good night. Or, good morning, depending on how the Earth moves where you are, and how many drinks you've had.
I've Got a Feeling:
Abnormally Silly
Whoooooooo!
I adore a television program from the nineties called Dr. Katz, Professional Therapist. Most of you should know what I'm talking about. For those of you who are not in the know, you are a tennis shoe. Go run a lap around the track and watch HGTV shows until you feel a great urge to plant a hibiscus in your garden.
If you give an echidna a hibiscus...
"An Alphabet" is my fave John Lennon short story thus far. Why? Because...because...because "A is for Parrot which we can plainly see, B is for glasses which we can plainly see, C is for plastic which we can plainly see, and D is for Doris." And there are roughly 22 other such letters in the English alphabet.
Right. I think I shall now drug myself so that there will be sleep. ~takes melatonin~ ~is not sleepy~
Pineapples are angry fruit. I was cutting one today, and as I was shucking it from its skin, I realized, 'This is the angriest fruit I have ever seen.' Just look at pineapples when you're next in store. They all seem to say, 'Come any closer, and I will scowl at your visage, which is most unpleasant to look at, you hopelessly backwards trollop!' And some pineapples are bi-lingual, so they say that also in Portuguese, which would be 'Venho mais perto, e eu scowl em seu visage, que da vontade é o mais desagradável olhar, você impossìvel para trás trollop!' And heaven forbid you get stuck with a tri-lingual pineapple, cause then it'll be all, 'Kom om het even welke dichter, en ik zal scowl bij uw visage, die het onplezierigst om is te bekijken, u hopeloos achteruit trollop!'
There is no word in the Portuguese language or the mystery language for either visage or trollop. As it turns out, the words are a French and English invention, respectively.
Did you know?
I feel bad for my pineapple that I cut into so many delicious chunks. It was really unhappy about it's state in life. It was beaten when it was a child.
1. Why not be a penguin? It is after all June, and you can have a tea party!
2. I seem to have found my mother's American Express Card sitting on the table next to me.
3. Bovine Spongioform Encealopathy. It can happen to you.
4. Hey Jude, don't make It mad...for It is stra-ange, and may be a rare disease...
5. I seem to have purchased an insane amount of soda over the Internet using my mother's credit card (I just have to share it with her when it gets here).
6. Dona Nobis Pacem, et Salvi Nos de ultima, et salva nos ten um.
7. My earrings look like orange sherbert.
8. One day, Alexa will want a sugar cube. And then she'll be sad, because she'll have forgotten where it is.
9. Oops.
9.5. Something insanely important that I can't tell you right now because I am silly...
10. Have a great summer!!! Love, nuns.
Good night. Or, good morning, depending on how the Earth moves where you are, and how many drinks you've had.
I've Got a Feeling:
Abnormally Silly