I guess it's now fashionable to treat people who care about you like complete and total shit.

I seem to have the worst judgement in life.
This fall I hope God actually puts a decent boy in my life that will treat me with the respect I deserve.

Grape Soda
Some money in my pocket
New jeans
New sneakers
My bumblebee tattoo
Coffee at the diner with Nina tonight
Maybe a cute boy to make me smile

These are the things that I make me happy.
These are the things I look for in life.

take it back, take it all back now.
the things I gave, like the taste of my kiss on your lips.
i miss that now.
i can't try any harder than I do.
all the reasons I gave, excuses I made for you.
i'm broken in two.

My mom is moving in Arizona in January.
I am the only remaining family now in Delaware.
Just me and my father's grave on Foulk Road.
Why has everyone left me?

from now on i will only try to peruse men with brown eyes. brown eyes are safe. i am postive at this point, blue and all shades in between are equivalent to a lethal dose of heroin to me.

And the thing is, even though I go out of my way to avoid it, I always think this time it's different and end up here again.

I smoked a bunch of pot today to forget, and it just helped me remember ( Read more... )

I been sitting here in my bedroom for the last half hour wishing desperately I could be Adrienne Nesser for a minute out of my life so I could know what it feels like to have such beautiful catchy love songs as the ones Billie Joe wrote down in a blue spiral notebook for her back during the making of Kerplunk.

I'm at matts right now.

too much coffee.

too many thought I thought I could write out.

forget it.