cycles

[raydon_12]

This morning I discovered that I'm learning to read and recognize my girlfriends cycles.  Being a typical male its taken me over a year to realize what I've been seeing.  the last several days she's been a bit distant, obsessing over her workouts and writing, being less responsive over my expressions of affections and bringing up the various

Comments

[dark_phoenix54]

It's great that you've recognized this. Best not to talk about difficulties in this phase- or the first couple of days of her period. Just give her a little space for a few days, but not so much space that she might think you're upset or something. (a lot of women feel unattractive right before their periods, hence the obsessing over the workouts) Probably telling you stuff you already know!

[raydon_12]

Thanks Laurie! Its good to have confirmation that I'm doing the right things.

[daphnep]

Did you know men have mood swings related to testosterone, too? It's much more short cycles. I forget if it swings within a day, or over the course of a couple of days. It's a bummer there's no outward markings, like a period, because I think it would go a long way toward building understanding between the sexes. "It's nothing," a guy could say. "I'm just on hour 26 of my cycle" and everyone could nod knowingly, sympathetic to that particular energy level or sensitivity. We could map mood, energy, sensitivity, sex drive, and find the points of comparison. Like "she was all horny and ready to go, and he just wanted to play video games. Turns out, she was ovulating and he was sooo in the five-to-six hour zone."

Or whatever. It would just help a lot of things, having mutual biofeedback mechanisms, where hormones are concerned.

[raydon_12]

Oh yes, we men do have our versions of cycles too. Sadly, it can be much more difficult to recognize, even for myself, and as far as I can tell, ours are not as regular or cyclic as most women's. Of course, thats just my opinion based on limited observation. I know that I have cycles, but I've never been able to find any real pattern to them for myself.

[molinaslim]

I think that there's a danger in becoming dismissive regarding a woman's emotions when she's premenstrual. As in, "she's just hyper sensitive, it's not me it's the hormones." I like to think that I'm often more honest with myself about what I'm feeling - that I'm more able to assess my current situation both emotionally and practically - when I'm about to get my period. In other words, if she's doing something different such as making more suggestions about the relationship or doubling her efforts towards a personal goal, pay attention. If she's anything like me, when she's premenstrual she is more able to vocalize what she's been thinking her entire cycle. Then bring it up again to discuss later, after the crazy-making time is over, so she knows you were listening.

Good luck!

[raydon_12]

Thanks! Those are great suggestions!