please stop posting up our personal busness ray... i aprecaite you writing this for me, but no one else has to know our problems..
and dont say that you love me because i know you dont. you havent for a very long time and it breaks my heart to even type this to you right now as im sitting alone in a public lirabry with nothing and wondering where im going to sleep tonight because i cant stay withy sieda nor jennifer and those are my only friends left.
im sorry i held you back for so long. all our "friends" and your family were right.. im useless.
im scared and i dont know what im going to do, but i know what kills me the most is that you dont love me and ill never have you agian. i never even had my last kiss with you. just dont hate me for what i have done to you.
yes B it is.. Not from me.. but from his mom, gary, my grandma, Nana, so on and so forth.
Ray gave you many of chances. You never changed. I like you B.. but you're lazy. You haven't kept a job since I've known you.. and honestly, my family should get something better then that. He shouldn't have to support you for 3 YEARS before something changes.. Thats just bullshit B.
I'm not talking shit on you, I'm just saying what needs to be said. Ray need to worrie about himself.. he's been going downhill for the past year. I know he can do better then what he's doing right now, he just can't do that with someone who expects him to support then FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIFES.
I'm sorry If I'm hurting your feelings. I just want everything to be OK for MY FAMILY....
im done.. dont talk to me and pretend to be my friend and then talk shit. i never wanted ray to "take care of me" and whatever.. but your right, i have alot of growing up to do. so now that ray has brokin it off with me and since we were going to see eatchother tomorrow.. maybe be should just stay with you guys. i dont want to hurt ray anymore. im getting my shit together and i want to marry ray one day, but i cant hurt him anymore. ray im sorry.. now that im out of your lives maybe for good who knows..now you wont have to deal with my bulolshit because im sure ray IS better off without me.
dont go making Ray feel guilty for giving you the boot. you bring drama into everybodies lives because you dont THINK. you blame everybody else for your problems (ie blaming me for trying to break you and ray up when you cheated on him) I hope you do grow up. and your little pitty me boo hoo ill be out of your lives crap isnt going to change my opinion. you've done enough damage already. and pretend be your friend? how many times did i tell you that i only tolerated you because of Ray. im sure other people think the same too.
well you are a real fake ass person to me then tim. u always used to tell me how can i put up with ray treating me the way he does, and i told you it was because i love him and i dont care. im not making ray feel guilty, but YOU HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA how it feels to be left with NOTHING tim i was left with fuckin nothing but my shit. i almost slept on the god damn beach, but now that ray and i browk up, you just fuckin talk shit. i was ALWAYS there for you tim. when u felt like shit, i was there with ray comforting you. and im sorry but i dont blame ANYONE for my problems. i never have.
im probably not even going to be able to get back with ray so you can have him all for yourself. and this "how many times did i tell you that i only tolerated you because of Ray. im sure other people think the same too." is bullshit and FUCKED UP..
ill have jenny pick up my stuff from you. you wont have to ever see me anymore. so leave it at that.
Everyone please don't bash on Bianca. It is not her fault the way she was raised, we were rasied differently and had people to look up to aka our parents. She never had that.
So please to save any more of this drama from happeneing please do not hate on each other.
We all have are flaws, this is hers and she needs to work them out on her own. By you guys bashing on her your just making matters worse. I know you guys are just trying to stick up for me but please this is a hard time for both me and Bianca.
She never blamed me for her being homeless, she blamed herself.
So all i ask is that you give words of encouragment and not hatefull things.
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and dont say that you love me because i know you dont. you havent for a very long time and it breaks my heart to even type this to you right now as im sitting alone in a public lirabry with nothing and wondering where im going to sleep tonight because i cant stay withy sieda nor jennifer and those are my only friends left.
im sorry i held you back for so long. all our "friends" and your family were right.. im useless.
im scared and i dont know what im going to do, but i know what kills me the most is that you dont love me and ill never have you agian. i never even had my last kiss with you. just dont hate me for what i have done to you.
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trust me this is one of the hardest desions i have ever made in my life
I just can't afford to take care of the both of us anymore
and it just seems like everytime you act like your trying it just falls apart
you have to understand i don't want to leave you, i "have" to leave you. Otherwise i would be out on the streets too
I can't help you if our not willing to help yourself Bianca. it just not fair to me
Once again im sorry, i just dont know what else to do anymore
I don't have all the awnsers when it comes to this
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You do need someone who isn't going to rely on YOU for everything.. EVERYONE needs someone like that.
I know I felt like shit when I had to depend on Mike to take care of me this past month.. THANK GOD I got my job with Regus...again.. haha
In any event. I think you did the right thing. and always remember I'll be here for you when ever you need someone.. n shit. =)
CALL ME TODAY!!!!!
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thats not true what so ever steph.. and that hurts me that u can even say that..=(
i should just leave ray alone then...
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Ray gave you many of chances. You never changed. I like you B.. but you're lazy. You haven't kept a job since I've known you.. and honestly, my family should get something better then that. He shouldn't have to support you for 3 YEARS before something changes.. Thats just bullshit B.
I'm not talking shit on you, I'm just saying what needs to be said. Ray need to worrie about himself.. he's been going downhill for the past year. I know he can do better then what he's doing right now, he just can't do that with someone who expects him to support then FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIFES.
I'm sorry If I'm hurting your feelings. I just want everything to be OK for MY FAMILY....
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im done.. dont talk to me and pretend to be my friend and then talk shit. i never wanted ray to "take care of me" and whatever.. but your right, i have alot of growing up to do. so now that ray has brokin it off with me and since we were going to see eatchother tomorrow.. maybe be should just stay with you guys. i dont want to hurt ray anymore. im getting my shit together and i want to marry ray one day, but i cant hurt him anymore. ray im sorry.. now that im out of your lives maybe for good who knows..now you wont have to deal with my bulolshit because im sure ray IS better off without me.
peace.
thanis for never suporting me at all.
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you blame everybody else for your problems (ie blaming me for trying to break you and ray up when you cheated on him)
I hope you do grow up.
and your little pitty me boo hoo ill be out of your lives crap isnt going to change my opinion. you've done enough damage already.
and pretend be your friend? how many times did i tell you that i only tolerated you because of Ray. im sure other people think the same too.
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im probably not even going to be able to get back with ray so you can have him all for yourself. and this "how many times did i tell you that i only tolerated you because of Ray. im sure other people think the same too." is bullshit and FUCKED UP..
ill have jenny pick up my stuff from you. you wont have to ever see me anymore. so leave it at that.
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Don't EVER blame ray for that bullshit again. EVER.
And Tim isn't a fake ass person. He tells it like it is.. Don't get mad at him for that.
man. Now i'm starting NOT to like you. Don't make ray eel bad for YOUR problems.
always remember YOU. DID. THIS. TO. YOURSELF.
No one else did this to you, just you too yourself.
ugh.
Now i'm done.
fuck all this.
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So please to save any more of this drama from happeneing please do not hate on each other.
We all have are flaws, this is hers and she needs to work them out on her own. By you guys bashing on her your just making matters worse. I know you guys are just trying to stick up for me but please this is a hard time for both me and Bianca.
She never blamed me for her being homeless, she blamed herself.
So all i ask is that you give words of encouragment and not hatefull things.
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