Apophallation and exploding testicles

[redjel]

A little article of the astonishing mating habits of different animalsI knew about the snails, penguins and barnacles. But a detachable, swimming penis? That's fairly lunatic. Or the Argentine duck which can use it's penis to lasso his lady! Humans are so boring (although I would be rather put out if someone attempted to lasso me which such an

Comments

[sarah_orange]

I want a detatchable swimming penis! I haven't even read the article yet and I want one! me!
*jumps up and down waving her hand*

=)

[redjel]

I know! It's so bizarre!

[glennkenobi]

Best article evah!

[redjel]

It is excellent!

[redjel]

:) Like some kind of cow-boy fetish?

[darknessrisible]

I did too! O_o

[redjel]

I think you two just have filthy mind ;)

[darknessrisible]

This article seems likely to change the way I think about Nine Incb Nails' most-played song... ;o)

[redjel]

??? Having not step foot in a filthy metal club in years (having given them up for filthy jazz bars and my thesis) I can't think what their most played song is...

[darknessrisible]

The song I'm thinking of is "Closer", in particular it's numbingly tedious refrain of "I want to fuck you like an animal". This line always disappointed me more than a little, since Mr. Reznor can write much better lyrics than that. Anyway, this line of thinking suggests some surreal lyrical variations, eg:

I want to fuck you like an animal. Specifically, I'd like to kidnap you by wrapping my penis around the outside of your neck.

I won't bore you with the other possibilities. The tortoise one, though - follow her around and pester her until she gets fed up and gives in - seems depressingly reminiscent of actual human behaviour! =o(

[redjel]

Poor tortoises/human males

I suppose nothing would be so bad as the male anglerfish, wasting away to become a mere appendage on the female.