Full. Body. Eyeroll.

[redstapler]

So there's been a lovely kerfuffle going on this week, the simple summary of which is, Can you be a hot girl and a nerd?

Leaving aside the irritating use of "girl" to describe adult women, I haven't really had any commentary other than a side-eye.

I finally figured out my response, left as a comment on the above linked post.

Here it is. Ready?

Comments

[neo_prodigy]

"If you can’t be a hot girl and a nerd, what the hell have my best girl friends and I been doing since childhood?"

I'M SAYING!!!! THANK YOU!!!!!

In addition to yourself, I've got legions of beautiful and sexy female nerds on my flist.

And as a few others pointed out: Felicia Day, Olivia Munn, Kristen Bell. Hello?

[redstapler]

My fantasy of an awesome night out is going for beers with my bffs, and for Kristen Bell, and Felicia Day to join up with us.

I've wanted to have beers with Kristen Bell since the Veronica Mars days.

[firynze]

That? Would be AMAZING.

[lwoodbloo]

...why is this even coming up? No one gets to define you but you. If you like anime, fuck it, like anime. Be nerdy.

Whoever puts it out there that you "can't" do something is just mistaken.

[bart_calendar]

I've never understood the upset with using "girl" to describe adult women.

I'm 42 and straight women and gay men in my peer group use the term "boys" to describe the men they date or could potentially date. Nobody questions that. Gay women and straight men in my peer group use the term "girls" to describe women they could/would potentially date.

Neither is a dis on the person they are talking about. A "man" or a "woman" is someone partnered or married or otherwise unavailable.

A "girl" or a "boy" is someone single of your sexual preference who may be available, or someone of your sexual preference who is walking down the street and attractive.

[redstapler]

That's a fair question.

And you're right: Many adults use "boy" and "girl" to describe other adults of those genders.

I think that's a shift in process, though.

I know that to a stranger, I'm a woman because I'm an adult. To me, I have to remind myself that I'm nearing 30, and that thinking of myself as a "girl" is incorrect. But I do it anyway because I often forget I'm an adult because I don't feel like one. (Even though I have a job, my own place, pay taxes, etc...)

I imagine in another generation or so, it won't be an issue because everyone will be boys or girls.

It's a complex thing that's as much gender politics as it is the evolution of language.

[firynze]

Whereas I do still think of myself as a girl. I am a woman, too, but I'm primarily a girl. It's a...matter of relative maturity, I guess, and personal perception. At least for me.

[redstapler]

It's one of those annoying things because we have to define our terms. Under some terms, absolutely I'm an adult.

Under others? Nope, not yet.

But those things tend to involve marriage and home ownership and bearing of children, all of which can vary by person, location, financial stability, capability, desire, etc etc etc...

FUCK IT. WE'RE ALL BOYS AND GIRLS.

[mercury_ca]

I refer to myself as girl. That's just how it's always been.
I can't reconcile myself as a woman because that's such a grown-up word and makes me eye roll just thinking about it and referring to myself as such. It just seems so put on, for lack of a better term. Overused in ways that make it pretentious. Basically it doesn't conjure up the mental image I have for myself. It's irritating, like people who aren't from the UK using the word ginger to describe the colour of my hair (and that of other red heads).

That's my take on it anyway.

[bart_calendar]

This.

[thatwordgrrl]

It makes me laugh that we don't even ask the "can you be hot and geeky" question of, say, David Tennant or Nathan Fillion. No, their geekiness just adds on another layer of Hot sauce.

So why do we ask that question of Felicia Day?