Comments | redturtleotaku: The Ash amongst the Stars

redturtleotaku

The Ash amongst the Stars - Chapter 2

May 24, 2010 10:23

( Chapter 2 )

Comments 20

myxstorie May 24 2010, 10:02:22 UTC

I love the flashbacks you're intertwining with the fic! This is so beautiful~ I love that the name-dropping doesn't seem that way, it just adds to the integrity of the story if that makes any sense.. Like, idk, because of the names you're giving (like Ryo and Kame) it makes it feel more whole, because we can put faces and personalities to the leader and the one opposing him. Idk, I'm not explaining this very well am I XD; I love it, though, really! ♥

redturtleotaku May 24 2010, 11:43:36 UTC

I'm really glad that you like the flashbacks! I'm enjoying writing them!
I was uncertain about whether or not to use the names of other Johnnys. I toyed with the idea of trying to make it semi-historically accurate and include leaders like Nobunaga or Tokugawa, but I thought that might be too restricting. Does that make sense? Haha now I can't explain myself!
Anyway, I'm happy to hear that you're still enjoying this! Congrats on being the first commenter too ;)

myxstorie May 24 2010, 13:42:44 UTC

I totally get you :) if you used the real historial names, your plot and stuff would be set, right? Because people KNOW the history of Nobunaga and so on, so it could be hard to take it wherever you wanted...

:D I never get first comment! Woo! :DDD

wait! i'll comment later! angela_psyche May 24 2010, 10:07:32 UTC

bad timing... need to eat supper first... then i'll read this... then comment...

Re: wait! i'll comment later! redturtleotaku May 24 2010, 11:44:13 UTC

Bless you! There's no hurry, it'll still be here waiting for you when you get back!

Enjoy your supper! :)

Re: wait! i'll comment later! angela_psyche May 24 2010, 12:05:04 UTC

yosh! finish eating and obviously reading your fic.. (of course! LOLs)

Waah... jin is worried about how to gain pi's loyalty (and also trust?)... hence he knew that he will have a hard time!

jin &jun surely does not have good terms with each other... hahaha!!!

i wait for the next chapter!!!

pop_power May 24 2010, 10:36:06 UTC

I hope that Pi manages to knock some god damn sense into Jin! Unless there's something shifty going on... who knows...

And hahaha! Winter games! Jun would totally love doing that to Jin (and in reality maybe no one would stop him hehhee)

Well done again! It was great! I need to know MOOREE thought! (and I knew Pi wasn't that much of a wimp! He got that guy away from his family!)

redturtleotaku May 24 2010, 11:46:38 UTC

Shifty? Do you think so? Interesting. Hehe.

Jun and Jin don't get along too well, do they? Whose team do you think Tegoshi was on? hahaha.

Thank you! MOOOREE is coming, I promise. Do you think I should try to get this finished before I go back to my other stories? I'm undecided.

lelouch7 May 24 2010, 15:56:12 UTC

cannot comment properly since it's past midnight here
but i love it
love the flashbacks
hope jun won't be jin's archenemy :)
is there any akame in the future?
love triangle is loved hehe evil me
thanks for this

redturtleotaku May 25 2010, 08:30:21 UTC

Thank you for commenting even though it was so late for you!
I'm glad that you liked this chapter.
Haha Jun and Jin don't like each other very much at all!
Hmmm I don't think there'll be any Akame in this one. I don't think I've ever written a love triange...interesting...;D
Thanks for reading!

blue_eye1 May 25 2010, 21:51:59 UTC

I must say it again. I really love how you entwine past with present. This time the current situation is much more calmer than the flashback from the past. It really makes this story much more interesting and absorbing.

Is it only me and my imagination or there is another story behind Jin's actions. Jin's dreams were very big when he was younger and I'm sure that they still are. His actions, thoughts and words make me wonder about his plans.

I also like very much the inner battles both Jin and Tomohisa have. They both probably would like to reach out in some way, especially Jin but the circumstances and stubbornness but also Pi's hurt don't help.

I really want to know where all this is going and how it all will end.
Thank You for sharing and I'm waiting for more.

P.S. I want to also Thank You for making me learn new English words while reading this story :)

redturtleotaku May 26 2010, 11:09:06 UTC

Thank you! I'm glad that you think so! I was worried that this chapter would be seen as kind of dull, but I'm trying to set the scene and build up the characters before I launch into the real drama. The flashbacks help me to do that, and it makes me happy that you appreciate them!

*grins* I can't give away Jin's secrets and motivation just yet. I'm still figuring out the extent of his character. I hope you like him!

:) So glad that this caught your attention. I'll try to improve as I go on!

New English words? I did! Cool! You're welcome :)