Obligatory Christmas Post
Ah, I suppose I should post a Christmas/Year-end post, eh?
First off I'm not going to hope everyone had a happy holiday, because I wish ever day to be happy for everyone. :)
Concerning the holidays. . .
My Christmas was very nice. :) This year I wish I had decorated. I realised I miss Christmas decorations in my house. For the past few years with my family it's been a lost cause to decorate. My siblings would break things and ruin displays and kill lights and stuff. So it was so heartbreaking to see something like that happen so I didn't bother doing it in the first place. Now that I'm not living at home that's not a problem. But, for some reason without the whole Santa jazz there didn't feel like a reason to decorate. Aaand, I think I should have. It makes me happy. X) I should have decorated here and my 2.0 ( Kyle and Tony's place. )
I also realised a bit late that while the actual act of wrapping gifts is a bit annoying ( I hate cutting the paper, pretty much. ) I really enjoy doing it, a bit too late to wrap too much, though. Next year I'm going to probably go all out wrapping and decorating.
It was a bit sad, also, being my first Christmas away from my parents, while my family ( read:siblings) annoys me, they're still my family. We tried to visit on Christmas Eve but our car broke down. Nasty stuff, it's still not fixed. I hope they enjoyed the gifts I picked out for them.
Kenny's Mum got me some nice stuff with Kenny's help, Eldest, the sequel to Eragon ( Do yourself a favour, don't watch the movie, it's nothing at all like the book except they have the same names and there are 4 direct book quotes ) and "Ghost of a Rose" a Blackmore's Night CD ( they're hard to find here, for some reason ). Kenny got me a teddy bear and a ring. A beautiful titanium ring. Kyle and Tony got me a World of Warcraft hoodie and a hunter patch ( my primary class ). I loves it so muches! I spent Christmas with Kyle ( which was a wonderful thing, I love spending time with him ) until Kenny got off work then Kenny and I went to spend some time with his family, I got to meet a lot of relatives I'll never remember and got some decent pressies from them, too. I was genuinely surprised to actually get anything from them, having just his Da and step-mother one time before, and his step-grandmother also one time before and no-one else. I was petrified before going, though. I don't like meeting a lot of people all at once, especially not family members. x.x But it was cool and afterwards Kenny and I met up with Kyle and Tony again and watched Eragon then we spent the night at their place ( so that Tony could drive Kenny to work. ) I can't think of anything better to have ended the day.
We also picked up the World of Warcraft trading card game. It's a lot of fun to play, and I think we're kinda addicted to getting cards. We have 4 starter sets and a ton of boosters between the 4 of us ( we decided just to keep everything together instead of yours and mine cards ) and the raid deck. *L* We got one of the ingame loot cards, but are still deciding what to do with it. Problem is everyone wants it, but it wouldn't really be fair for any of us to get it. Technically Kenny bought the deck it came in, but we're not gonna do that. Kyle and I are thinking of selling it on e-bay to re-coup some of the cost of the cards, but Tony is against the idea, 'cause he wants the in-game pet. I have no idea what Kenny thinks, I think he's left the decision up to me. Anyway, I'm just glad that I FINALLY got the night elf hunter hero card ( Look up how to play if you don't know what I mean ) It's the only hero we still don't have in normal size, so I always get to play with the epic size *L*
Reflecting on the past year. . .
A lot has happened and not much at all has happened. In the past year I moved out of my parent's place. A huge deal to me which I've talked about here. I'm still not used to the whole "we're a unit" thing in financial things. I think this bothers Kenny a lot, he's mentioned getting me a card for his bank account and giving me money to spend. I couldn't do that. I'm the sort of person who asks for things and mostly expects not to get them ( there's a few things I insist upon. . . ) so just getting stuff on my own would never happen, I figure Kenny makes the money he should spend it, not me.
And as always I've met new friends and lost some ( well, grown distant from them, anyway. )Of course not talking to people makes me really sad, but I've gotten used to the fact that no matter how much someone claims we'll always be friends and always be in contact it won't happen. I think I'm just forgettable, or something, people meet someone better and forget about me. I'm hoping this won't happen with Kyle, as our lives are really intertwined, more-so than just about anyone else ( not counting Kenny, but I don't think we're parting ways anytime soon at all. I mean, he's introduced me to his family )
Last October ( of '05 ) I met the Morbid Deviants, and that started getting me less afraid of people, though I still stress around tons of people I don't know, but over the year it's gotten a lot less intense. I'm actually asking people things in stores and talking freely with random people. Hell, I've even started conversations with people I don't know in person. A very scary thing for me. Hopefully over this next year I'll get even better. And get my GED or something, mebbie learn to drive and get a job and stuff. It's a bit hard for other people to understand the depth of my fear for certain things, like looking stupid in front of strangers and to some extent friends. It's like a phobia, really. If you're not afraid of colours (Chromatophobia) then you'll never get how someone could be afraid of something like that.
Anyway, that's one of the hopes I have, that I learn to live in the world, rather than lurk hopefully unseen in the shadows, ready to pounce and cuddle people. :P
Otherwise not much has happened over the year. I started playing WoW, something I claimed I would never do, I met my wonderful, sweet Kenny and started dating him then moved in with him. Met Kyle who's possibly my soulmate if we weren't in love with other mens and could work together besideswhich ( you know those sort of friends, aye? ) Realised that not living with my parents wasn't as scary as I thought it would be, but is still pretty scary. Realised that I have serious, real flaws, and lack some flaws I thought I had ( or realised they're not flaws ) Over-all it's been filled with self discovery, and hopefully self growth; pain and hurt as well as joy and happiness. There's not much I'd go back and change: a few things, though, I wish I could take back or do over or handle differently, but I think that if you don't have those moments you're probably selectively forgetting stuff and won't remember what not to do again.
In conclusion. . .
I'm happy with this year for the most part and had a happy holiday and am looking forward to a new year to see how much I'll change and grow.
I wish every one of my friends happiness and joy, and the ability to see how much they've got, even if it seems there's only sorrow and nothingness. Remember: if you're reading this then at least one person cares for you and wants you to smile. :)
Thoma~
First off I'm not going to hope everyone had a happy holiday, because I wish ever day to be happy for everyone. :)
Concerning the holidays. . .
My Christmas was very nice. :) This year I wish I had decorated. I realised I miss Christmas decorations in my house. For the past few years with my family it's been a lost cause to decorate. My siblings would break things and ruin displays and kill lights and stuff. So it was so heartbreaking to see something like that happen so I didn't bother doing it in the first place. Now that I'm not living at home that's not a problem. But, for some reason without the whole Santa jazz there didn't feel like a reason to decorate. Aaand, I think I should have. It makes me happy. X) I should have decorated here and my 2.0 ( Kyle and Tony's place. )
I also realised a bit late that while the actual act of wrapping gifts is a bit annoying ( I hate cutting the paper, pretty much. ) I really enjoy doing it, a bit too late to wrap too much, though. Next year I'm going to probably go all out wrapping and decorating.
It was a bit sad, also, being my first Christmas away from my parents, while my family ( read:siblings) annoys me, they're still my family. We tried to visit on Christmas Eve but our car broke down. Nasty stuff, it's still not fixed. I hope they enjoyed the gifts I picked out for them.
Kenny's Mum got me some nice stuff with Kenny's help, Eldest, the sequel to Eragon ( Do yourself a favour, don't watch the movie, it's nothing at all like the book except they have the same names and there are 4 direct book quotes ) and "Ghost of a Rose" a Blackmore's Night CD ( they're hard to find here, for some reason ). Kenny got me a teddy bear and a ring. A beautiful titanium ring. Kyle and Tony got me a World of Warcraft hoodie and a hunter patch ( my primary class ). I loves it so muches! I spent Christmas with Kyle ( which was a wonderful thing, I love spending time with him ) until Kenny got off work then Kenny and I went to spend some time with his family, I got to meet a lot of relatives I'll never remember and got some decent pressies from them, too. I was genuinely surprised to actually get anything from them, having just his Da and step-mother one time before, and his step-grandmother also one time before and no-one else. I was petrified before going, though. I don't like meeting a lot of people all at once, especially not family members. x.x But it was cool and afterwards Kenny and I met up with Kyle and Tony again and watched Eragon then we spent the night at their place ( so that Tony could drive Kenny to work. ) I can't think of anything better to have ended the day.
We also picked up the World of Warcraft trading card game. It's a lot of fun to play, and I think we're kinda addicted to getting cards. We have 4 starter sets and a ton of boosters between the 4 of us ( we decided just to keep everything together instead of yours and mine cards ) and the raid deck. *L* We got one of the ingame loot cards, but are still deciding what to do with it. Problem is everyone wants it, but it wouldn't really be fair for any of us to get it. Technically Kenny bought the deck it came in, but we're not gonna do that. Kyle and I are thinking of selling it on e-bay to re-coup some of the cost of the cards, but Tony is against the idea, 'cause he wants the in-game pet. I have no idea what Kenny thinks, I think he's left the decision up to me. Anyway, I'm just glad that I FINALLY got the night elf hunter hero card ( Look up how to play if you don't know what I mean ) It's the only hero we still don't have in normal size, so I always get to play with the epic size *L*
Reflecting on the past year. . .
A lot has happened and not much at all has happened. In the past year I moved out of my parent's place. A huge deal to me which I've talked about here. I'm still not used to the whole "we're a unit" thing in financial things. I think this bothers Kenny a lot, he's mentioned getting me a card for his bank account and giving me money to spend. I couldn't do that. I'm the sort of person who asks for things and mostly expects not to get them ( there's a few things I insist upon. . . ) so just getting stuff on my own would never happen, I figure Kenny makes the money he should spend it, not me.
And as always I've met new friends and lost some ( well, grown distant from them, anyway. )Of course not talking to people makes me really sad, but I've gotten used to the fact that no matter how much someone claims we'll always be friends and always be in contact it won't happen. I think I'm just forgettable, or something, people meet someone better and forget about me. I'm hoping this won't happen with Kyle, as our lives are really intertwined, more-so than just about anyone else ( not counting Kenny, but I don't think we're parting ways anytime soon at all. I mean, he's introduced me to his family )
Last October ( of '05 ) I met the Morbid Deviants, and that started getting me less afraid of people, though I still stress around tons of people I don't know, but over the year it's gotten a lot less intense. I'm actually asking people things in stores and talking freely with random people. Hell, I've even started conversations with people I don't know in person. A very scary thing for me. Hopefully over this next year I'll get even better. And get my GED or something, mebbie learn to drive and get a job and stuff. It's a bit hard for other people to understand the depth of my fear for certain things, like looking stupid in front of strangers and to some extent friends. It's like a phobia, really. If you're not afraid of colours (Chromatophobia) then you'll never get how someone could be afraid of something like that.
Anyway, that's one of the hopes I have, that I learn to live in the world, rather than lurk hopefully unseen in the shadows, ready to pounce and cuddle people. :P
Otherwise not much has happened over the year. I started playing WoW, something I claimed I would never do, I met my wonderful, sweet Kenny and started dating him then moved in with him. Met Kyle who's possibly my soulmate if we weren't in love with other mens and could work together besideswhich ( you know those sort of friends, aye? ) Realised that not living with my parents wasn't as scary as I thought it would be, but is still pretty scary. Realised that I have serious, real flaws, and lack some flaws I thought I had ( or realised they're not flaws ) Over-all it's been filled with self discovery, and hopefully self growth; pain and hurt as well as joy and happiness. There's not much I'd go back and change: a few things, though, I wish I could take back or do over or handle differently, but I think that if you don't have those moments you're probably selectively forgetting stuff and won't remember what not to do again.
In conclusion. . .
I'm happy with this year for the most part and had a happy holiday and am looking forward to a new year to see how much I'll change and grow.
I wish every one of my friends happiness and joy, and the ability to see how much they've got, even if it seems there's only sorrow and nothingness. Remember: if you're reading this then at least one person cares for you and wants you to smile. :)
Thoma~