Comments | reflectology: Racy topics are RACY!

becca_radcgg in reflectology

Racy topics are RACY!

Aug 18, 2010 08:36

WARNING: THIS WEEK’S POST BY BECCA IS RACY! That’s right, I SAID RACY! It mentions PORN. However, no description is given as the post is more about our perception of pornography than the porn itself. If this makes you at all uncomfortable, I apologize, but it was just such a stunning moment in our friendship that I had to reflect on it ( Read more... )

becca_radcgg, rl

Comments 5

wrldpossibility August 18 2010, 16:52:36 UTC

Very interesting topic!

Generally, I think I agree with you. But I say 'generally' because there are varying types and degrees of porn and varying responses to it, male and female.

For instance, I don't believe watching porn is usually mental cheating, but I do believe that it CAN be, if an obsession with it begins to replace the intimacy between real life partners. Likewise, if the porn in question is the type that takes place in chat rooms with other people, then I do believe relationships (of whatever sort) can be formed which constitute emotional or mental cheating. So there's many shades of gray involved.

Is it too readily available? Yes, I think so, speaking as someone with kids (and speaking as a reading teacher, I've seen the same thing with the bracelets at school...disgusting). It's very easy to access online of course, and I do think the days of back-room video stores, etc was probably better for society. ;)

As for men vs. women, yes they both like it, IMO. Men just admit to it more easily.

becca_radcgg August 18 2010, 17:03:23 UTC

K, I totally see your point with the grey areas. I'm certain in the particular case we were talking about though, the porn did not take away from the physical relationship the two people were involved in. Which is why I stated my opinion as such.

I'm pretty sure she was referring to pre-recorded video types as well, but thank you for reminding me that thers's more to the industry than just pre-made movies. Chat rooms, streaming video, phone sex lines, etc... I hadn't really considered all of that at the time. And would I feel differently about it if we'd been talking about someone having phone sex with someone else? YES. No question.

Even thinking about those bracelets makes me sick to my stomach. If I hadn't seen them myself, I wouldn't believe it.

Oh, men and women watch it, I'm positive but it just seems like it's an EXPECTATION that men like it and watch it. While women have to be more subtle about their usage.

You share some very interesting points. THANK YOU! :)

badboy_fangirl August 18 2010, 17:37:49 UTC

I know of people whose entire lives have been destroyed by their porn addictions--families destroyed, careers lost, everything blown because of the insatiable and unrelenting power of porn ( ... )

becca_radcgg August 18 2010, 19:18:50 UTC

I totally see your perspective. Yes, if it starts to rule your life and destroy your relationships, totally disapprove. Thing is, the number of people who watch it "recreationally" and the number of people who "abuse" it are not equal.

Lots of people are able to see it for what it is.

C, can you honestly say that you have never fantasized about someone else while you were in a relationship? I know I have.

Anyway, again, maybe I was seeing things in too much black and white. But she wasn't willing to see the grey areas either.

Awesome thoughts though, C. Definitely worth the wait!

badboy_fangirl August 18 2010, 19:41:25 UTC

Well, you probably wouldn't believe that I've never had sex based on some of the stuff I've written--but I haven't. I fooled around when I was younger, but I never did the deed, and then I rededicated myself to chastity when I was 21.

It's not that I can't see the gray areas (even in my own life), it's that gray can lead you some place you don't want to go. So it's best to just avoid it altogether, IMHO.

I don't think everyone who drinks is an alcoholic, either, but the potential is there, see?