megs, that had to be done to preserve it for all eternity...

i am so angry today. at everything. at myself, at ben, at david, at my situation and my crappy life and the fact that ive run out of toilet paper and have to use tissues and i cant go out and get more cos i dont have a fucking car ( Read more... )

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oh yeah, and want to know what's worse? i start a new fucking job tomorrow. i'm terrified and indifferent all at the same time.

i want to come home.

isnt it intruiging that everything can change in a heartbeat? nope, it sucks serious ass. that's it, im turning gay. any takers ( Read more... )

ive gotten myself into a real situation. and i dont feel guilty about it. that's the worst thing of all. cool part is: it was worth the wait. ahh, but hold on, before you judge me completely, it was all icing but no cake. not that anything is changed or justified by it but it deludes me into not hating myself yet.

sociopath.

today was hideous. it was really not so bad of a day, good in parts, fantastic in others, but i feel like hell. thanks in part to a night of absynth on saturday evening, of which i swear i'm on day two of the hangover ( Read more... )

(note to self ( Read more... )

my lj is beginning to sound suspiciously like an "ode to my non-dates with david". oh well, deal. i want to remember every moment with perfect clarity because i have never met anyone like him ( Read more... )

we left the office, arm in arm. he took me to his place in the porsche. an epic view of the harbour bridge and luna park. we played soccer on the balcony. i won. i told him his ass looked good in his seven's (jared!!! sevens!) he told me he liked my cream leather, especially after i told him it is, after all, an orgasm jacket. we went to this ( Read more... )