spur of the moment fic...
Title: Standstill
Author: relinquished972
Fandom: Prince of Tennis
Characters/Pairings: Tezuka, Fuji, mentions of Atobe and Inui, past Tezuka/Fuji
Rating: G/PG-13
Genre: Angst/Romance
Warnings: shounen-ai
Summary: He felt as if his life were at a standstill. He was, after all, the ex-boyfriend who didn't know how to let go.
<< Standstill >>
It had been just under a year ago that Fuji had come up to him and told him he didn't want to try anymore.
Not that he hadn't half-expected it at the time - they had been going through a very rough patch in their fledgling relationship - but it had cut deep nonetheless. They agreed to be friends on the surface, but underneath it all, Tezuka Kunimitsu wondered if he could really ever forget the past three months where mere "friendship" was an entirely inadequate description of what they had. Still, he had agreed, so he had to try.
Fuji, it seemed, was eager enough to have their relationship revert back to the way it was before any of the troubles between them started brewing. He smiled at Tezuka and bid him a "good morning" at morning practice, handed him a towel and water bottle after laps, picked up his uniform jacket on their way to class and said "see you later" when they parted. The only difference was, the touch of Fuji's hand on his never lingered like it used to, his voice no longer held the glowing warmth that let Tezuka know the other cared about him. It was like everything between them had just evaporated into thin air with one phone conversation.
On the other hand, Tezuka found it incredibly difficult to keep his eyes from brightening just that little bit when Fuji came within view, hand lingering just a moment longer when they shook hands over the net, eyes unconsciously combing his surroundings for a sign of him. It was pathetic, Atobe declared, that Tezuka had been reduced to a lovelorn and abandoned puppy waiting insistently for the owner who would never return. Tezuka generally ignored him, because no one would be able to understand what Fuji meant to him.
It had been carrying on like this for a while and Tezuka thought that he was getting over it as his settled back into the old friends routine. Until, on one particularly bad day, Tezuka saw Fuji kissing another girl on the cheek and hugging her. He then realised, largely due to the sharp pain lancing through his chest and the sudden loss of his ability to breathe, he was no where close to moving on. He had to wonder - he had to know - who that girl was, why was she there, what relationship did they have? And, more importantly, what was she doing that could bring that same warmth into Fuji's eyes - the one that used to be directed at him?
Was it because she, unlike Tezuka, found it much easier to openly give and take affection? Did she do little things like bringing him an extra towel or water bottle after practice, or spending hours looking for a jacket at the shopping centre because he'd mentioned in passing that he'd needed a new one? Perhaps she did do those things, and more. Tezuka knew, for sure, that Fuji still wore the jacket he'd bought him and the shoes they had gone shopping for together. And every time he saw them, he would remember.
Atobe was right.
He knew Fuji didn't appreciate the love that was still visible and tangible within Tezuka's every word and action. To him, Tezuka was a mere burden - the ex boyfriend who didn't know how to move on. Every step Fuji took forward, he probably had to factor in Tezuka's reaction to it, the hurt he would feel and what Fuji could do to minimise it. And Tezuka knew, logically, that he should move on and stop being such a burden to Fuji. He knew, but his heart wouldn't let him and he didn't know how.
This is pathetic.
Inui once made the assessment that Fuji, in general, was a very nice guy. But if he didn't like you, he just didn't like you. It was cruel, but that was Fuji for you. And, as Tezuka knew, from the distance and faint hint of annoyance in Fuji's eyes as he forlornly admitted I don't know how to be friends with you, Fuji could no longer find it in himself to even like him.
Author: relinquished972
Fandom: Prince of Tennis
Characters/Pairings: Tezuka, Fuji, mentions of Atobe and Inui, past Tezuka/Fuji
Rating: G/PG-13
Genre: Angst/Romance
Warnings: shounen-ai
Summary: He felt as if his life were at a standstill. He was, after all, the ex-boyfriend who didn't know how to let go.
<< Standstill >>
It had been just under a year ago that Fuji had come up to him and told him he didn't want to try anymore.
Not that he hadn't half-expected it at the time - they had been going through a very rough patch in their fledgling relationship - but it had cut deep nonetheless. They agreed to be friends on the surface, but underneath it all, Tezuka Kunimitsu wondered if he could really ever forget the past three months where mere "friendship" was an entirely inadequate description of what they had. Still, he had agreed, so he had to try.
Fuji, it seemed, was eager enough to have their relationship revert back to the way it was before any of the troubles between them started brewing. He smiled at Tezuka and bid him a "good morning" at morning practice, handed him a towel and water bottle after laps, picked up his uniform jacket on their way to class and said "see you later" when they parted. The only difference was, the touch of Fuji's hand on his never lingered like it used to, his voice no longer held the glowing warmth that let Tezuka know the other cared about him. It was like everything between them had just evaporated into thin air with one phone conversation.
On the other hand, Tezuka found it incredibly difficult to keep his eyes from brightening just that little bit when Fuji came within view, hand lingering just a moment longer when they shook hands over the net, eyes unconsciously combing his surroundings for a sign of him. It was pathetic, Atobe declared, that Tezuka had been reduced to a lovelorn and abandoned puppy waiting insistently for the owner who would never return. Tezuka generally ignored him, because no one would be able to understand what Fuji meant to him.
It had been carrying on like this for a while and Tezuka thought that he was getting over it as his settled back into the old friends routine. Until, on one particularly bad day, Tezuka saw Fuji kissing another girl on the cheek and hugging her. He then realised, largely due to the sharp pain lancing through his chest and the sudden loss of his ability to breathe, he was no where close to moving on. He had to wonder - he had to know - who that girl was, why was she there, what relationship did they have? And, more importantly, what was she doing that could bring that same warmth into Fuji's eyes - the one that used to be directed at him?
Was it because she, unlike Tezuka, found it much easier to openly give and take affection? Did she do little things like bringing him an extra towel or water bottle after practice, or spending hours looking for a jacket at the shopping centre because he'd mentioned in passing that he'd needed a new one? Perhaps she did do those things, and more. Tezuka knew, for sure, that Fuji still wore the jacket he'd bought him and the shoes they had gone shopping for together. And every time he saw them, he would remember.
Atobe was right.
He knew Fuji didn't appreciate the love that was still visible and tangible within Tezuka's every word and action. To him, Tezuka was a mere burden - the ex boyfriend who didn't know how to move on. Every step Fuji took forward, he probably had to factor in Tezuka's reaction to it, the hurt he would feel and what Fuji could do to minimise it. And Tezuka knew, logically, that he should move on and stop being such a burden to Fuji. He knew, but his heart wouldn't let him and he didn't know how.
This is pathetic.
Inui once made the assessment that Fuji, in general, was a very nice guy. But if he didn't like you, he just didn't like you. It was cruel, but that was Fuji for you. And, as Tezuka knew, from the distance and faint hint of annoyance in Fuji's eyes as he forlornly admitted I don't know how to be friends with you, Fuji could no longer find it in himself to even like him.