Title: "Those Eyebrows-!" (Methods Of Governance Remix)
Author:
pepper_field Summary: Cam was trying to be cool about it, but this was the fifth time he'd traveled offworld, and the excitement wasn't showing any signs of wearing off.
Fandom: Stargate SG-1
Characters: Cameron Mitchell, Daniel Jackson
Rating: G
Disclaimer: Characters belong to whoever owns the Stargate copyright - story written for fun and not profit (more's the pity).
Original story:
"Those Eyebrows-!" by Koanju
---
This was never going to get old.
Cam was trying to be cool about it, but this was the fifth time he'd traveled offworld, and the excitement wasn't showing any signs of wearing off. He glanced again at the Nathi ambassador. Both Daniel and the ambassador were starting to get twitchy about Cam's attention, but he just couldn't help it. The guy was so very... alien. He had that funky eyebrow thing going, and was tall and spindly in an I've-evolved-on-a-planet-with-lower-gravity-than-you sort of way.
Sure, okay, so Teal'c was an alien - but just yesterday he'd roped Cam into helping to collect his standing order from the Yankee Candle Company. It was hard to think someone as otherworldly when you'd seen them eating Krispy Kremes and bidding on Ebay for a Stormtrooper action figure ("I must have this additional one, Colonel Mitchell. It is in the original packaging.").
'Sides, acting like he'd just fallen off the turnip truck was driving Daniel nuts, and driving Daniel nuts was an old, established SG-1 pastime. Who was Cam to break with tradition?
"Mitchell, you've got to stop staring. You're making the Nathi nervous."
It was Daniel's fault, really. He asked for it. He did such a spectacular line in irritable - how could anyone resist provoking that? "I know that," said Cam, in his best tone of corn-fed wonder. "I'm just having flashbacks to watching Dune in college. Those eyebrows-!" He shook his head admiringly, and was gratified to hear the grinding of Daniel's teeth.
The Nathi ambassador drew himself up to his full height, and frowned at the group of Tauri. Daniel's eyes flickered nervously to Cam, who kept his expression bland, and let Daniel do the talking. In French, as it turned out. ("French?" "Yes. Why - d'you speak it?" "I do, actually - well, a little - and I don't understand a damn word you're saying." "Old French, Mitchell - about as related to Modern French as Old English is to Modern English." "Huh." "What?" "Oh, nothing." "What?" "Well, it's just, isn't it a little..." "What?" "Nevermind. Carry on." "A little what?" "Time's a-wastin', Daniel.")
---
Afterwards, Cam could pinpoint the exact moment he knew it was gonna go to hell. He'd not been listening to the conversation between Daniel and the ambassador, as he understood maybe one word in a hundred. Instead, he'd watched the body language. The ambassador's people might have been transplanted to a different planet centuries ago, but some things had stayed the same. And Cam saw the moment when subtle shifts in the ambassador's stance turned 'tall and spindly' into 'really very tall... and weren't the arms poking out from that ornate robe pure wiry muscle, no unnecessary body fat whatsoever...?'
Cam himself didn't need to shift. He'd had his hands on his gun, in a casually defensive stance, since they arrived. But he needed Daniel to move back. Right now.
"Yo, Daniel," he called, casually. Daniel glanced back, irritated.
"Mitchell, this is a very delicate-"
"Jackson," said Cam, sharply. And Daniel's eyes sharpened, actually focusing on Cam for the first time. A flicker of understanding passed between them, and Daniel used the excuse of looking at Cam to take a subtle step sideways, giving Cam a clear field of fire. Some part of Cam's brain noted this approvingly, along with the fact that Daniel's hands were on his weapon, seemingly without making any kind of antagonistic move. Daniel turned back to the ambassador and started to talk, rapid fire, his tone earnest and friendly.
But the ambassador snapped out something that needed no translation. Daniel fell silent when the guards appeared. Yeah, this was careening towards the point of no return.
"What's goin' on, Daniel?" Cam asked, as casually as he could whilst trying to move into a position to cover as many of the guards as possible.
"I don't know," said Daniel, smiling in a friendly-but-puzzled way at the ambassador. "I thought it was going swimmingly, myself."
"Looks like the ambassador didn't share that view."
"Apparently not, no. What's the plan?"
"Don't get killed on our fifth mission."
"That's a plan?"
"It's a fervent prayer."
During this exchange, they'd managed to edge closer together, covering a wider area with their weapons as the guards advanced, and getting out of each other's line of fire. Daniel took a moment to glance at Cam, giving him an assessing look, and then a brief nod. "We'll do just fine, Cam," he said, quietly.
Cam heard the double meaning, and quirked a pleased smile. "We gonna kick some alien ass, Doctor Jackson?"
"Oh, do let's, Colonel Mitchell."
---
When it was all over, and they stumbled through the Gate, hot on the heels of Sam and Teal'c, Cam and Daniel dropped to the ramp and exchanged a look. Cam couldn't help but grin, grimy and exhausted though he was. "That was my first simple-mission-that-went-to-hell," he said, proudly.
Sam groaned. "Don't you start." She and Teal'c exchanged a long-suffering look.
Daniel poked him in the arm. "Newbie," he said, affectionately.
Cam grinned, and reached up, ruffling the archaeologist's hair and knocking his glasses askew. "See, I knew you'd have to chill out and start liking me sometime," he said, smugly.
"Gah! If you're going to act like an annoying younger brother, that time is far distant."
"Hey, show some respect for the team leader, Jackson." Three different hands swooped out to smack him on the head. "HEY!"
"Team leader," huffed Sam, linking her arm with Teal'c as they strolled away. "These flyboys are all the same, aren't they? Think they're king of the world, just 'cause they've got wings and a Y chromosome."
"Indeed."
Cam glanced at Daniel. "How 'bout a democracy?"
"I like to think we're a technocracy," replied Daniel.
"A what?"
Daniel smiled enigmatically, and pushed himself to his feet with a groan, following Sam and Teal'c. "Or maybe a tetrarchy," he called back.
"Wait, hold up, what does that...?"
Yeah. They were going to be just fine.
---
END.