Saval Chronicles [4] - Soon to be renamed
Verse 3 must be read before you embark on this latest entry of wonder and goodness, else what you will witness on this page will make very little (or, littler) sense than it should.
The great adventure of
darkwings08 and yours truly continues. And introducing our new permanent traveler and giver of smarts, silentdizo !!
Disclaimer: This is all for shits and giggles, written by me when a plotbunny whacked me over the head with a spoon of epic proportions. All characters mentioned in this piece (not including Sa, Diz and I) are only used for fun, same applies to all quotes posted: no copyright infringement was intended at all and no offence was meant. All ideas for freakishly weirdo plotlines were taken from actual conversations between
darkwings08 and I... some things were just born out of my tired, overworked and incredibly random brain.
Made purely for enjoyment so... go forth and enjoy!
BE WARNED this part is epically long, very random and may contain traces of nuts.
--~*~--
Verse 4 - The Journey Begins
--~*~--
…”You have the power to save Dave.”
“…eh?”
And with that, my heart plummets. Plummets like two differently-shaped objects thrown from the top of the leaning tower of Pisa that hit the ground at the same time as their velocity will become equal at some point.
“…You don’t know a Dave do you…?”
“Should I?” Diz asks curiously. I can see the path her mind is taking and quickly put some road works in her way.
“Well we assumed you would, at least, Val assured me that you would be able to study up on him to tell us who it is we’re actually after.” Sa’s back.
“Get out of my head.”
“Bite me.”
I curl my lip, knowing this could increase, and the rating of this journal along with it. I sigh, resigned to the fact that Sa officially now has a VIP pass to my imagination with free lunch thrown in. My pass to her brain is lost in the mail. Diz observes us silently, like a child watching zebras in a zoo. She’s never been in my head before. She’s never met Sa before. And she certainly has no idea what a VIP pass offers.
The silence grows between us, Sa and I having our own private spat in our (deeper) subconscious and Diz watching us. Eventually, she gets bored.
“What makes you think I know who this Dave dude is?”
“Well, we have no idea either.” I reply, opting to be the bigger man and finish the interior argument between Sa and I. Mummy always told me to be the one to finish a fight, even if someone else starts it.
“What’s he got to do with anything anyway, I mean, you pulled me out of a fic-session for this?”
“Welcome to my life.” I mutter. Diz glances at me but I don’t elaborate. I don’t want to give the Tentacle reason to smite me. And It will, if It feels It should. Sa, however, decides to do the smart thing and explain.
“Months ago, the Tentacle found Val through her dreams, also taking her away from a rather enjoyable albeit voyeuristic fic and making her the Scribe to Its Immortal Will. Since then, it has instructed Val to do many things, one of which was finding me. Another, I believe, was finding you.”
Diz stares. Like a child stares at shiny objects in a store of many other shiny objects. In this case, Sa is the shiny object. I must admit, the way she speaks makes me want to stare at her like she’s a shiny object too. Her commentary makes me sound like a hero. And that makes me feel pretty. Also, my VIP pass just arrived, and I feel powerful.
“The Tentacle also came to me in my dreams, telling me simply ‘Dave’ before leaving. Although Val got this part wrong and said I met the Tentacle the way that she met It, even though I clearly reminded her that the Tentacle showed itself to me on a beautiful beach.”
“Don’t start with me…”
“Well it’s not my fault you got it wrong.”
“What is written cannot be rewritten! You should know that. Why do you think there are so many spelling errors? I can’t change them, the way the Tentacle’s Will is written is how it shall stay. It is not always a good speller.”
“You’re hiding behind excuses…”
“You’re hiding behind big words.”
“GUYS!” Diz snaps suddenly.
“What?” Sa and I reply together. It sounds kinda funky actually, like the Backstreet Boys.
“Chill.”
We glare at each other. Glare at her. Glare at each other again and step back.
“OK,” Diz continues, holding her palms up as a sign of peace. “So let me get this wrong. You had a dream about a tentacle…” she points at me. I nod vigorously, glad to be chosen first. Her glance slips to Sa. “Then YOU had a dream about a tentacle…” Sa nods, though more regally than I did. It’s all an act, she’s just as excited as me. MY VIP pass to her brain tells me so. Diz takes a deep breath.
“And then you,” she points at Sa again “tried to summon me to her brain,” she points at me “so that I could help you two find some dude named Dave who could quite easily be a figment of your imagination just like this weirdo tentacle is?”
Both Sa and I nod solemnly. Diz looks from one to the other.
“…seriously?”
We both nod solemnly. There is a silence. Then Diz starts laughing.
“Are you SERIOUSLY telling me that you pulled me away from an a-m-a-z-i-n-g fic to help you find some dude that a random dream-tentacle told you about?”
“Don’t say…!”
Too late… one minute my mind is clear. The next all is black.
The end.
Well, not quite. But when my mind clears again, Diz is clinging to me as though she’s just seen a ghost. I pat her on the head gently.
“Please don’t laugh at the Tentacle, youngling. It smites.”
Diz makes a slightly choked noise and clings some more. Sa checks her watch, which she has set to be exactly 13 minutes faster than real-time because my mind is two minutes faster than her mind and my clock is thus set 11 minutes faster than real-time, and sighs. After a few moments Diz stops clinging, straightens up, looks me in the eye and says.
“Val, I have no idea who in heck this Dave dude is, but I’ll help you find him.”
I smile. Yay! I don’t have to research.
“But, there is one condition.”
My jaw drops. Sa chuckles slightly next to me. Diz raises an eyebrow.
“Ok,” I finally manage. It’s not that I don’t want to oblige Diz, it’s just that I’m scared the Tentacle will smite again. And it’s MY mind It will smite in. “Shoot…”
“The name of the Chronicle must be changed.”
“Deal.” Sa speaks before I can even open my mouth. She grins. I glare and mutter something akin to “just coz you now have a VIP pass to my brain doesn’t mean you can speak for me too” before nodding brightly and pulling a shiny bright red quill from midair.
“What do you wanna call it?”
Diz thinks for a while, trying out many different thinking poses, many of which don’t suit her because she just looks silly trying to imitate the Thinker. Before she can come to a conclusion, my world shakes and I clutch my head.
“It shall be called the Di Saval Chronicles.” Says a deep voice. And my mind stops shaking.
“Fine.” I mumble. “I’ll change it next entry.” My quill vanishes.
“Good.”
“Settled then.” Sa says, bouncing slightly on her heels. She looks far too professional for my brain and I mentally push her till she trips slightly and frowns at me. She recovers her holier-than-thou more-fangirls-than-me attitude quickly, however, and proceeds. “Now, Diz, where do we look for Dave?”
Diz chews her lip for a moment before closing her eyes tightly and digging her heels into the ground. Sa and I both cock our heads to the left and watch her intently. Whatever she’s trying to do it’s not working. But damn is it insanely entertaining to watch. After a few moments Diz opens one eye and looks at me, pouting.
“It’s not working…”
“What exactly is it that should be working…?”
“I want to make us go somewhere.”
“Try clicking your heels and saying ‘there’s no place like home’.” I suggest with a smirk. Diz glares. “Hey, sorry kiddo, my mind’s locked at the moment. I don’t want you ending up in another rabbit hole and getting rejected.”
“Door.” Sa says calmly.
“What?”
“Door,” she points to the floor where there is now miraculously a door. Diz goes to it and opens it, looking in.
“Yep, that’s it!” without another word she jumps in, followed closely by Sa, with me jumping in last, gracefully slamming the door shut as I fall through it, very Indiana-Jones-goes-Monsters-Inc.
I land not-so-gracefully on a pile of pin cushions. With extra pins included. Sa and Diz seem to have avoided the epic landing and are standing not far off, looking at something with their mouths open. I am not pleased. Before I can complain more, however, I see what they’re looking at and mirror their expressions.
As promised, I end this verse as epically as my muddled brain allows:
“Where in all holy Ackles are we?”
Awesome epicness continues in Verse 5
The great adventure of
darkwings08 and yours truly continues. And introducing our new permanent traveler and giver of smarts, silentdizo !!
Disclaimer: This is all for shits and giggles, written by me when a plotbunny whacked me over the head with a spoon of epic proportions. All characters mentioned in this piece (not including Sa, Diz and I) are only used for fun, same applies to all quotes posted: no copyright infringement was intended at all and no offence was meant. All ideas for freakishly weirdo plotlines were taken from actual conversations between
darkwings08 and I... some things were just born out of my tired, overworked and incredibly random brain.
Made purely for enjoyment so... go forth and enjoy!
BE WARNED this part is epically long, very random and may contain traces of nuts.
--~*~--
Verse 4 - The Journey Begins
--~*~--
…”You have the power to save Dave.”
“…eh?”
And with that, my heart plummets. Plummets like two differently-shaped objects thrown from the top of the leaning tower of Pisa that hit the ground at the same time as their velocity will become equal at some point.
“…You don’t know a Dave do you…?”
“Should I?” Diz asks curiously. I can see the path her mind is taking and quickly put some road works in her way.
“Well we assumed you would, at least, Val assured me that you would be able to study up on him to tell us who it is we’re actually after.” Sa’s back.
“Get out of my head.”
“Bite me.”
I curl my lip, knowing this could increase, and the rating of this journal along with it. I sigh, resigned to the fact that Sa officially now has a VIP pass to my imagination with free lunch thrown in. My pass to her brain is lost in the mail. Diz observes us silently, like a child watching zebras in a zoo. She’s never been in my head before. She’s never met Sa before. And she certainly has no idea what a VIP pass offers.
The silence grows between us, Sa and I having our own private spat in our (deeper) subconscious and Diz watching us. Eventually, she gets bored.
“What makes you think I know who this Dave dude is?”
“Well, we have no idea either.” I reply, opting to be the bigger man and finish the interior argument between Sa and I. Mummy always told me to be the one to finish a fight, even if someone else starts it.
“What’s he got to do with anything anyway, I mean, you pulled me out of a fic-session for this?”
“Welcome to my life.” I mutter. Diz glances at me but I don’t elaborate. I don’t want to give the Tentacle reason to smite me. And It will, if It feels It should. Sa, however, decides to do the smart thing and explain.
“Months ago, the Tentacle found Val through her dreams, also taking her away from a rather enjoyable albeit voyeuristic fic and making her the Scribe to Its Immortal Will. Since then, it has instructed Val to do many things, one of which was finding me. Another, I believe, was finding you.”
Diz stares. Like a child stares at shiny objects in a store of many other shiny objects. In this case, Sa is the shiny object. I must admit, the way she speaks makes me want to stare at her like she’s a shiny object too. Her commentary makes me sound like a hero. And that makes me feel pretty. Also, my VIP pass just arrived, and I feel powerful.
“The Tentacle also came to me in my dreams, telling me simply ‘Dave’ before leaving. Although Val got this part wrong and said I met the Tentacle the way that she met It, even though I clearly reminded her that the Tentacle showed itself to me on a beautiful beach.”
“Don’t start with me…”
“Well it’s not my fault you got it wrong.”
“What is written cannot be rewritten! You should know that. Why do you think there are so many spelling errors? I can’t change them, the way the Tentacle’s Will is written is how it shall stay. It is not always a good speller.”
“You’re hiding behind excuses…”
“You’re hiding behind big words.”
“GUYS!” Diz snaps suddenly.
“What?” Sa and I reply together. It sounds kinda funky actually, like the Backstreet Boys.
“Chill.”
We glare at each other. Glare at her. Glare at each other again and step back.
“OK,” Diz continues, holding her palms up as a sign of peace. “So let me get this wrong. You had a dream about a tentacle…” she points at me. I nod vigorously, glad to be chosen first. Her glance slips to Sa. “Then YOU had a dream about a tentacle…” Sa nods, though more regally than I did. It’s all an act, she’s just as excited as me. MY VIP pass to her brain tells me so. Diz takes a deep breath.
“And then you,” she points at Sa again “tried to summon me to her brain,” she points at me “so that I could help you two find some dude named Dave who could quite easily be a figment of your imagination just like this weirdo tentacle is?”
Both Sa and I nod solemnly. Diz looks from one to the other.
“…seriously?”
We both nod solemnly. There is a silence. Then Diz starts laughing.
“Are you SERIOUSLY telling me that you pulled me away from an a-m-a-z-i-n-g fic to help you find some dude that a random dream-tentacle told you about?”
“Don’t say…!”
Too late… one minute my mind is clear. The next all is black.
The end.
Well, not quite. But when my mind clears again, Diz is clinging to me as though she’s just seen a ghost. I pat her on the head gently.
“Please don’t laugh at the Tentacle, youngling. It smites.”
Diz makes a slightly choked noise and clings some more. Sa checks her watch, which she has set to be exactly 13 minutes faster than real-time because my mind is two minutes faster than her mind and my clock is thus set 11 minutes faster than real-time, and sighs. After a few moments Diz stops clinging, straightens up, looks me in the eye and says.
“Val, I have no idea who in heck this Dave dude is, but I’ll help you find him.”
I smile. Yay! I don’t have to research.
“But, there is one condition.”
My jaw drops. Sa chuckles slightly next to me. Diz raises an eyebrow.
“Ok,” I finally manage. It’s not that I don’t want to oblige Diz, it’s just that I’m scared the Tentacle will smite again. And it’s MY mind It will smite in. “Shoot…”
“The name of the Chronicle must be changed.”
“Deal.” Sa speaks before I can even open my mouth. She grins. I glare and mutter something akin to “just coz you now have a VIP pass to my brain doesn’t mean you can speak for me too” before nodding brightly and pulling a shiny bright red quill from midair.
“What do you wanna call it?”
Diz thinks for a while, trying out many different thinking poses, many of which don’t suit her because she just looks silly trying to imitate the Thinker. Before she can come to a conclusion, my world shakes and I clutch my head.
“It shall be called the Di Saval Chronicles.” Says a deep voice. And my mind stops shaking.
“Fine.” I mumble. “I’ll change it next entry.” My quill vanishes.
“Good.”
“Settled then.” Sa says, bouncing slightly on her heels. She looks far too professional for my brain and I mentally push her till she trips slightly and frowns at me. She recovers her holier-than-thou more-fangirls-than-me attitude quickly, however, and proceeds. “Now, Diz, where do we look for Dave?”
Diz chews her lip for a moment before closing her eyes tightly and digging her heels into the ground. Sa and I both cock our heads to the left and watch her intently. Whatever she’s trying to do it’s not working. But damn is it insanely entertaining to watch. After a few moments Diz opens one eye and looks at me, pouting.
“It’s not working…”
“What exactly is it that should be working…?”
“I want to make us go somewhere.”
“Try clicking your heels and saying ‘there’s no place like home’.” I suggest with a smirk. Diz glares. “Hey, sorry kiddo, my mind’s locked at the moment. I don’t want you ending up in another rabbit hole and getting rejected.”
“Door.” Sa says calmly.
“What?”
“Door,” she points to the floor where there is now miraculously a door. Diz goes to it and opens it, looking in.
“Yep, that’s it!” without another word she jumps in, followed closely by Sa, with me jumping in last, gracefully slamming the door shut as I fall through it, very Indiana-Jones-goes-Monsters-Inc.
I land not-so-gracefully on a pile of pin cushions. With extra pins included. Sa and Diz seem to have avoided the epic landing and are standing not far off, looking at something with their mouths open. I am not pleased. Before I can complain more, however, I see what they’re looking at and mirror their expressions.
As promised, I end this verse as epically as my muddled brain allows:
“Where in all holy Ackles are we?”
Awesome epicness continues in Verse 5