Fanfic: Happy Hour Again
Try not to die of shock, but it's actual fiction, actually written and actually posted.
Title: Happy Hour Again
Genre: Doctor Who
Pairings: Five/Turlough, Five/Jack, Jack/Turlough, all in a very UST sort of way
Author notes: for doyle_sb4, who wanted Five/Turlough, Five/Jack, and a planet. Hope you like it!
Thanks to my very best friend ragdoll for the beta!
Happy Hour Again
by Jennifer Adams Kelley
Jack Harkness surveyed his surroundings-- the opulent paneled office, the stunning view of the gardens outside below, the inspiring vista of a burgeoning city and majestic mountain range in the distance-- and sighed. Really, the whole Saving Civilization thing was way overrated. He appreciated the experience, of course, and felt a justified sense of pride in having dragged the people of Hestiopia from despair to triumph in just eight short months. Longest months of my life, Jack corrected.
It was time to go. He knew it. He also knew that he’d lingered only to savour a certain underling one last time. Still, said underling was on vacation for another week, and he was bored out of his tree. So… time to go. Grinning in anticipation, he wandered over to his office closet, and pulled out a mish-mash of advanced components he had been nurturing along ever since crash-landing on the planet. A flick of a switch started the device up-- although, looking at it, only a small blue blinking light gave away that it operated. Satisfied, Jack returned to his desk, opened the bottom left drawer, and pulled out the ingredients for what passed as a martini on the planet. The TARDIS would be along soon enough. And when it arrived, he would be so outta there….
**
The Doctor glared at Turlough from across the control console. Turlough matched the glare with a patently bored expression, eyebrow cocked in challenge. "Pompeii?" the Time Lord ventured.
"Hardly."
"Ming Dynasty?"
"Chinese food doesn't agree with me."
"Ancient Egypt?"
Turlough snorted. "Do I look like a King Tut fanatic?"
"All right, then. Regency England?"
"I have had enough of the Upper Class Twit to last me several lifetimes."
"America, 1968? Lots of political intrigue there. Assassinations, a war no one wants to fight…."
Turlough rolled his eyes. "Try again."
The Doctor sighed. "Fourth Great and Bountiful Human Empire?"
Turlough wrinkled his nose. "When's that?"
"Oh, around 200,000, Earth Calendar."
"Ugh."
"Not even for the five moons?"
"No."
"Sometimes, Turlough, you're no fun whatsoever."
The ginger-haired youth tried hard not to smile. "Perhaps if you were to suggest some time and place that didn't involve Earth…."
"What's wrong with Earth?" the Doctor demanded, looking surprised that anyone could have an objection to his favourite planet.
"Try being exiled there and you’d know."
"But I was, Turlough, I was."
"Really?"
"Well… I got better." They looked at each other, smirked at each other, and shook their heads at each other. "Well, then," the Doctor continued, "Where would you like to go?"
"Eye of Harmony."
"We've been there recently."
"We've been to Earth recently."
"You have me there." The Doctor began laying in the coordinates, frowning when the console didn't respond as he anticipated. "How very odd."
"What is?" Turlough came around the console to stand at the Doctor's side. He studied the readouts curiously. "Surely those aren't the right numbers."
"They're not. Someone-- or something-- is summoning us."
"Summoning us? How?"
"The best way to describe it from a non-technical standpoint--" Turlough gave the Doctor an annoyed look. "--would be that a transtemporal subharmonic is interfering with the navigation system."
"Natural or manufactured?"
"Oh, manufactured, surely. In any case, we'll find out soon enough-- it seems we're about to materialize."
The central column shuttered to a stop. Turlough beat the Doctor to the viewscreen control. "Looks harmless enough, in a rather Earth-bound sort of way." He gestured at the well-manicured formal garden on the screen. "And which part of English history have we landed in this time, Doctor?"
"Not English history at all, unless the English managed to colonize other planets on their own." The Time Lord double-checked the coordinates to be sure, then announced, "We're on Hestiopia."
"Oh, splendid!"
"You've heard of it?"
"No, not really. Had you going, though, didn't I?"
"Yes, well… let's have an explore, then." The Doctor pulled his panama hat out of a coat pocket and shook it back into shape. After plopping it on his head at a jaunty angle, he pushed the door handle up and prepared to step out onto the planet's surface.
"Doctor…."
He looked back at his companion, annoyed. "What?"
"If someone brought the TARDIS here, couldn't that same someone send the TARDIS away? Without us in it?"
"Why would anyone do that?"
Turlough shrugged. "Oh, I don't know, to trap us, perhaps?"
"You're too suspicious sometimes."
"And you're too trusting."
They glared at each other for nearly a minute. "Oh, all right," the Doctor finally sighed, stomping back to the central column and bending underneath it as if were the greatest chore known to man or Time Lord. He disconnected the small dematerialization circuit and passed it on to his companion. "Here. You're in charge of who leaves when. Satisfied?"
Turlough tucked it into his interior jacket pocket. "Shall we?" he asked, buttoning his jacket and pushing past his friend through the door. "Smells like Earth," he commented as the Doctor joined him on a path that led precisely though sculptured hedges and well-planned tufts of colorful flowers. "The roses are in bloom."
"Lots of planets have roses, Turlough. Come along." The Doctor dug a small tracking beacon out of a coat pocket, and, after studying it for a moment, strode off toward what looked to be the nearest garden exit.
**
Jack grinned as he entered the garden, The familiar shape of a blue police call box lurked just off one of the main paths. Sometimes the Doctor could be too predicable. He sauntered toward the TARDIS, pushing the door open with the full expectation of finding the Doctor and Rose impressed at his sudden reappearance in their lives. Instead, he found himself in a much-too-bright console room devoid of people. He looked around, puzzled. Although he was certainly in a TARDIS console room, he wasn't exactly sure that he was in the right one. For one thing, it seemed… smaller. And brighter. And… very retro. Very much a late 20th century version of future.
Hmm. He wouldn't be surprised if the Doctor decided to remodel, especially if Rose complained too much about the console room not looking like a "proper" console room. Jack wouldn't put it past her-- she had rearranged the canteen at least twice while the three of them were together. Jack smiled at the thought of the curvy blonde haranguing the big-eared, leather-clad man. "Hey, guys?" he called out finally. "Anyone home?"
When no one responded, Jack decided he would go deeper into the TARDIS. They could be having a cuppa (ugh) or be looking for more 2 x 4s and drywall….
**
"How very curious," the Doctor commented, examining a jumble of electronic components that glowed and pulsed in rhythm to the tracking beacon still in his hand. "There's at least three different races' technology at work here." He placed the beacon down on the table and pulled out his half-frames. After putting his glasses on, he bent closer to inspect the device further.
Turlough watched the Doctor at work for a moment, a small grin softening his otherwise-haughty features. Boredom, though, soon tugged at his attention. Figuring he might as well look for clues to the person who built the apparatus, he started inspecting the rest of the room.
On the desk he found a note, written in English. "Doctor, is this a Human colony?"
"Hmm? Oh, no. Not to my knowledge. Why?"
Turlough rattled the note at him. "It's in English."
The Doctor peered at his companion over his glasses. "Are you sure?"
Turlough looked annoyed. "I had to read enough of it at Brendan School." He passed the note over. "And you were right about us being brought here on purpose."
"Hmm." The Doctor read the note aloud. " 'Yo, Time Traveling Temptations--' " He glanced at his companion. "Surely that doesn't refer to us?"
"Well, one of us is certainly tempting…."
"Egotist." He returned to the note. "Let's see… 'You should have stayed right and tight in the TARDIS. But to make the return worth your while, I'll have the martini bar up and running by the time you get back. Jack.' "
"Who's Jack?"
"I haven't a clue… at the moment. I daresay we'll both know in, oh, fifteen minutes or so." He took his glasses off and tucked them back into his coat.
**
Time Lord and companion walked back though the sculptured grounds in relative silence. As they re-entered the garden hosting the TARDIS, though, the Doctor stopped suddenly, wincing and clutching at his hearts. Turlough immediately grabbed his elbow and helped him to remain standing. "Cosmic angst?"
"Worse," the Doctor gasped. "Temporal angst."
"Temporal?!"
"Yes." The painful wave passed; the Doctor brushed off Turlough's support with a gentle pat to his hand. Standing straight once again, he continued, "Something's gone a little off in my timeline."
"Someone, I should think. Jack."
"Jack be nimble, Jack be quick…"
"Jack be playing you a naughty trick?"
"Let's find out, shall we?"
Turlough shrugged agreement and followed the Doctor inside the TARDIS.
**
Jack looked up from the mixology experiment he had set up in the console room and smirked at the new arrivals. "Well, hey there, stranger!" He gave the Doctor a visual once-over that brought a faint blush to the Time Lord's cheeks. "Like the new body. Have it long?"
"Erm, long enough."
"You're cute when you're uncomfortable." Jack added the last ingredient to the shaker and mixed things up. "The usual, Doctor, or have your tastes changed along with your tongue?"
"The usual's fine, erm, Jack," The Doctor replied, trying not to look as nonplussed as he felt.
"Great." Jack poured three drinks, set them up on a tray, and skirted around the bar cart to serve. He passed a martini to the Doctor, his hand lingering on the glass a moment longer than absolutely necessary. Turning to Turlough, he offered him his hand. "Hi, I'm Jack Harkness. Captain Jack Harkness."
"Turlough." He accepted a drink, giving the Doctor a dirty look when the Time Lord shook his head slightly in discouragement.
"Right." Jack rested the tray on top of the central column and raised his glass in toast. "To old friends and new acquaintances."
"Cheers," the Doctor echoed politely.
The three clinked glasses. Jack drank deeply, Turlough sipped, and the Doctor feigned a swallow. "So… where's Rose?"
"Rose?" Turlough echoed.
"She's… not with me at the moment."
"She okay?"
"As far as I know."
"Good." Jack finished his martini. "Either of you need a refill?"
Turlough raised his mostly-empty glass; Jack nodded and brought both glasses and the tray back to the cart.
"So, Jack… why did you, erm, call?" the Doctor asked.
Jack shrugged. "Needed a lift. Missed being here. The usual. So… why'd you leave me on the station?"
"Ah…." The Doctor had no idea what to say. He knew that Jack came from his future, but also knew he'd better not say anything to alert him that something was off until he knew for sure whether the tall, dark, well-muscled man was friend or foe.
Jack took the silence to mean it wasn't something to talk about in public. "No problem. We'll discuss things later." He freshened the drinks, gave Turlough's back to him, and gave the Time Lord a disarming grin. "What's our next stop?" The Doctor and Turlough exchanged worried glances. "Not interested in resuming a threesome, huh? Well, okay, I'll survive somehow. Still, it's a drag you got stuffier when you got prettier." He slammed back his martini began packing up the bar cart. "I'll keep out of your way until we land some place. If it's okay I hitch a lift, that is."
"Of course," the Doctor said.
"Great." Jack sounded cheerful; he didn't, however, meet either set of blue eyes as he wheeled his cart out of the room.
As soon as he left, the Doctor jerked his head toward the door. "Go after him."
"Me?" Turlough balked.
"You. Get him talking, try to find out exactly when and where he's from. But don't let on he's from my future."
"All right."
"Meanwhile, I'll analyze the readouts and see whether I can place him back in the proper time stream." He passed his empty glass to Turlough.
**
Jack found himself unloading the bar cart by slamming things down instead of placing them properly. He had expected the Doctor to be at least apologetic for leaving him behind in the aftermath of the Daleks' defeat. At the very least, he had hoped that the Doctor was still his very good friend, despite the different body. But… he felt like he was intruding. And he didn't understand it.
"You forgot these," Turlough said, sauntering into the canteen with two empty glasses.
"I left in kind of a rush."
"We noticed." The ginger-haired youth held out a glass. "Refill? And help yourself, while you're at it."
Jack raised an eyebrow. "You're too kind," he said, obediently mixing up a fresh batch of martinis.
Turlough foraged for some nuts, a wedge of Wensleydale, and some crackers; he set up the snack on the battered wooden table, found napkins, plates, and a cheese cutter, and settled into a red vinyl diner chair as Jack placed a fresh drink in front of him.
The captain grabbed a chair opposite, swung it around, and saddled it. "So… what's his problem?"
"Worry, I suppose." Turlough faked a nonchalant shrug. "You know how he can get about problems in the time streams."
"Yeah, he's a real pain in the butt about it." Jack raised an eyebrow in realization. "Hey, I'm not the problem, am I?"
"It is strange to meet up with a companion from a different incarnation."
"Yeah?"
"The Time Lords frown on that sort of thing, apparently."
"Oh, sure, right." Warning bells had gone off in Jack's head. Still, maybe he should confirm before fully admitting that the Doctor he had drawn to Hestiopia came before "his" Doctor and not after.
**
The Doctor swore the beeping the TARDIS console made sounded sad. Although he had gotten some information from it, he still felt something was missing. And no matter how he rearranged and enhanced the calculations he fed the console, he still couldn't get all the projections he felt he needed. He suspected something kept him from going beyond a certain point.
Then he remembered. Turlough still had the dematerialization circuit. That had to be the source of the computations problem. He would have to go and find the boy….
**
"…and so we drove the car into a ditch, and that's when I first met the Black Guardian." Turlough eyed his empty glass. "Mynkos, I've had a little too much."
"Are you even old enough to drink?" Jack teased.
"Depends on what planet's calendar you use."
"I hear you!" Jack casually swirled the olive around his otherwise-parched glass. "Ever been to Gallifrey?"
"Once. Didn't see much of it, of course. We spent our time in the Death Zone."
"Oh, that's a drag."
"I've been in worse places."
"I don't doubt it."
Turlough lowered his gaze; Jack almost thought he was embarrassed. "You're very kind."
"I can be much more than kind."
"I'm not surprised."
Jack gazed at the ginger-haired youth for a moment. Oh, yes, he was completely loyal to his Doctor; just as he and Rose were loyal to theirs. Too bad that Jack shouldn't actually be hanging with him…. "Well, I've enjoyed this little chat, but I gotta go have words with the Doctor."
"Oh? Why?"
"You're cute when you're feigning innocence." Jack patted Turlough's hand. "Don't worry, I have some idea what's going on."
"There's nothing going on here."
"That's not what that blush says."
Turlough, who hadn't been blushing, felt the flush creep up his cheeks. "It's a little hot in here," he demurred.
"Some like it hot." Jack obliged, though, by reaching for the shaker and refilling Turlough's glass.
"I don't think this will cool me much," Turlough said, gulping the martini down.
"Good. I don't want it to." Jack studied Turlough's expression for a moment, a disappointed look crossing his handsome features. "Aw… don't play for my team, huh?"
"Erm… don't know which team I play for, if you put it that way."
"Well… let me help you decide." He leaned over and planted a firm kiss on the youth's lips.
**
The Doctor stopped short before entering the canteen. His companion and guest were clearly quite occupied and… perhaps he shouldn't interrupt. He backpedaled some 30 feet back down the corridor, pushing away the waves of… envy? jealousy?... that threatened to drown him.
He worked hard to keep the more… tender… emotions out of his life. Lives, really, because he had made sure not too get too deep with anyone since he had bolted from Gallifrey. Although he certainly found himself tempted to get closer to several companions-- Jamie, Jo, Sarah, Nyssa-- he had only ever allowed himself to merge with Romana. And that was only because, as a Time Lord, she understood.
Still, he had no idea he had ranked Turlough as high as Nyssa until he saw him kissing Jack.
He shook his head, trying to dislodge both the sight and thought. Then, sounding breathier than usual, he called, "Turlough? Jack? Where are you?"
**
Turlough felt great disappointment when Jack withdrew his lips. Jack, however, merely grinned. "Not a human, are you?"
"That obvious?"
"It's all in the taste, ya know." He raised his voice. "Hey, Doctor, in the canteen. The martinis are still flowing…."
"Ah, excellent." The Doctor entered and took a seat, vaguely focusing on the small cooktop beyond the table. "I could use another…."
"Not like you," Turlough commented.
"Everything is slightly messed-up at the moment."
Jack passed the Doctor a fresh drink. "I assume you mean me."
"Unfortunately, yes."
"How far off am I from you."
The Doctor sighed. "I am my fifth incarnation."
"Okay. I get the picture."
"And you're with…?"
"Better I don't say."
"Ah, yes, quite. Still, the faster you're dropped off somewhere, the better."
"Do you have to go?" Turlough wondered.
"Yes." Both the Doctor and Jack were emphatic in their answer.
"If you'd return the dematerialization circuit…?" the Doctor added, holding out a hand.
Turlough pulled it out of his jacket and passed it over reluctantly. The Doctor let his hand linger over Turlough's a moment longer than necessary before snatching the circuit away.
"Last call?" Jack asked, waving the shaker past the others.
"None for me, thanks, I'm driving." The Doctor placed his untouched drink down on the table and, tossing and catching the dematerialization circuit like a cricket ball, left the room.
Turlough placed his glass down as well. "Might as well return to the console room…."
"I hear you, brother." Jack placed the shaker and the glasses in the small sink.
**
The Doctor kept his eyes firmly on the time rotor as Jack and Turlough returned to the control room. "So, Doctor, where we off to?" Jack asked, gazing at the odd readout and marveling at the retroness of it all.
"Erm… Cardiff, 2006?"
"Works for me."
The time rotor shuddered to a stop. "We've arrived."
"Okay, then." Jack brushed his lips against Turlough's cheek, and did the same for the Doctor. "Be seeing you, then." He palmed the door control and strode out confidently.
The moment Jack had left, the Doctor shut the TARDIS doors and dematerialized. "So much for that."
"Our encounter with him's not going to mess up the time streams, is it?"
"I certainly hope not." The Doctor spun the coordinate controls at random and smiled as the time rotor resumed its up-and-down motion.
Turlough watched the Time Lord watch the rotor, and eventually sighed. "Earth again?" he taunted.
"Perhaps. Perhaps the Eye of Orion. I set the coordinates randomly."
"I didn't think you could do that."
"Oh, I do it all the time, I just don't like to admit it."
"Like many other things you won't admit?"
The Doctor gave his companion a stern look. "That's enough, Turlough. Let's see where we'll land next."
Title: Happy Hour Again
Genre: Doctor Who
Pairings: Five/Turlough, Five/Jack, Jack/Turlough, all in a very UST sort of way
Author notes: for doyle_sb4, who wanted Five/Turlough, Five/Jack, and a planet. Hope you like it!
Thanks to my very best friend ragdoll for the beta!
Happy Hour Again
by Jennifer Adams Kelley
Jack Harkness surveyed his surroundings-- the opulent paneled office, the stunning view of the gardens outside below, the inspiring vista of a burgeoning city and majestic mountain range in the distance-- and sighed. Really, the whole Saving Civilization thing was way overrated. He appreciated the experience, of course, and felt a justified sense of pride in having dragged the people of Hestiopia from despair to triumph in just eight short months. Longest months of my life, Jack corrected.
It was time to go. He knew it. He also knew that he’d lingered only to savour a certain underling one last time. Still, said underling was on vacation for another week, and he was bored out of his tree. So… time to go. Grinning in anticipation, he wandered over to his office closet, and pulled out a mish-mash of advanced components he had been nurturing along ever since crash-landing on the planet. A flick of a switch started the device up-- although, looking at it, only a small blue blinking light gave away that it operated. Satisfied, Jack returned to his desk, opened the bottom left drawer, and pulled out the ingredients for what passed as a martini on the planet. The TARDIS would be along soon enough. And when it arrived, he would be so outta there….
**
The Doctor glared at Turlough from across the control console. Turlough matched the glare with a patently bored expression, eyebrow cocked in challenge. "Pompeii?" the Time Lord ventured.
"Hardly."
"Ming Dynasty?"
"Chinese food doesn't agree with me."
"Ancient Egypt?"
Turlough snorted. "Do I look like a King Tut fanatic?"
"All right, then. Regency England?"
"I have had enough of the Upper Class Twit to last me several lifetimes."
"America, 1968? Lots of political intrigue there. Assassinations, a war no one wants to fight…."
Turlough rolled his eyes. "Try again."
The Doctor sighed. "Fourth Great and Bountiful Human Empire?"
Turlough wrinkled his nose. "When's that?"
"Oh, around 200,000, Earth Calendar."
"Ugh."
"Not even for the five moons?"
"No."
"Sometimes, Turlough, you're no fun whatsoever."
The ginger-haired youth tried hard not to smile. "Perhaps if you were to suggest some time and place that didn't involve Earth…."
"What's wrong with Earth?" the Doctor demanded, looking surprised that anyone could have an objection to his favourite planet.
"Try being exiled there and you’d know."
"But I was, Turlough, I was."
"Really?"
"Well… I got better." They looked at each other, smirked at each other, and shook their heads at each other. "Well, then," the Doctor continued, "Where would you like to go?"
"Eye of Harmony."
"We've been there recently."
"We've been to Earth recently."
"You have me there." The Doctor began laying in the coordinates, frowning when the console didn't respond as he anticipated. "How very odd."
"What is?" Turlough came around the console to stand at the Doctor's side. He studied the readouts curiously. "Surely those aren't the right numbers."
"They're not. Someone-- or something-- is summoning us."
"Summoning us? How?"
"The best way to describe it from a non-technical standpoint--" Turlough gave the Doctor an annoyed look. "--would be that a transtemporal subharmonic is interfering with the navigation system."
"Natural or manufactured?"
"Oh, manufactured, surely. In any case, we'll find out soon enough-- it seems we're about to materialize."
The central column shuttered to a stop. Turlough beat the Doctor to the viewscreen control. "Looks harmless enough, in a rather Earth-bound sort of way." He gestured at the well-manicured formal garden on the screen. "And which part of English history have we landed in this time, Doctor?"
"Not English history at all, unless the English managed to colonize other planets on their own." The Time Lord double-checked the coordinates to be sure, then announced, "We're on Hestiopia."
"Oh, splendid!"
"You've heard of it?"
"No, not really. Had you going, though, didn't I?"
"Yes, well… let's have an explore, then." The Doctor pulled his panama hat out of a coat pocket and shook it back into shape. After plopping it on his head at a jaunty angle, he pushed the door handle up and prepared to step out onto the planet's surface.
"Doctor…."
He looked back at his companion, annoyed. "What?"
"If someone brought the TARDIS here, couldn't that same someone send the TARDIS away? Without us in it?"
"Why would anyone do that?"
Turlough shrugged. "Oh, I don't know, to trap us, perhaps?"
"You're too suspicious sometimes."
"And you're too trusting."
They glared at each other for nearly a minute. "Oh, all right," the Doctor finally sighed, stomping back to the central column and bending underneath it as if were the greatest chore known to man or Time Lord. He disconnected the small dematerialization circuit and passed it on to his companion. "Here. You're in charge of who leaves when. Satisfied?"
Turlough tucked it into his interior jacket pocket. "Shall we?" he asked, buttoning his jacket and pushing past his friend through the door. "Smells like Earth," he commented as the Doctor joined him on a path that led precisely though sculptured hedges and well-planned tufts of colorful flowers. "The roses are in bloom."
"Lots of planets have roses, Turlough. Come along." The Doctor dug a small tracking beacon out of a coat pocket, and, after studying it for a moment, strode off toward what looked to be the nearest garden exit.
**
Jack grinned as he entered the garden, The familiar shape of a blue police call box lurked just off one of the main paths. Sometimes the Doctor could be too predicable. He sauntered toward the TARDIS, pushing the door open with the full expectation of finding the Doctor and Rose impressed at his sudden reappearance in their lives. Instead, he found himself in a much-too-bright console room devoid of people. He looked around, puzzled. Although he was certainly in a TARDIS console room, he wasn't exactly sure that he was in the right one. For one thing, it seemed… smaller. And brighter. And… very retro. Very much a late 20th century version of future.
Hmm. He wouldn't be surprised if the Doctor decided to remodel, especially if Rose complained too much about the console room not looking like a "proper" console room. Jack wouldn't put it past her-- she had rearranged the canteen at least twice while the three of them were together. Jack smiled at the thought of the curvy blonde haranguing the big-eared, leather-clad man. "Hey, guys?" he called out finally. "Anyone home?"
When no one responded, Jack decided he would go deeper into the TARDIS. They could be having a cuppa (ugh) or be looking for more 2 x 4s and drywall….
**
"How very curious," the Doctor commented, examining a jumble of electronic components that glowed and pulsed in rhythm to the tracking beacon still in his hand. "There's at least three different races' technology at work here." He placed the beacon down on the table and pulled out his half-frames. After putting his glasses on, he bent closer to inspect the device further.
Turlough watched the Doctor at work for a moment, a small grin softening his otherwise-haughty features. Boredom, though, soon tugged at his attention. Figuring he might as well look for clues to the person who built the apparatus, he started inspecting the rest of the room.
On the desk he found a note, written in English. "Doctor, is this a Human colony?"
"Hmm? Oh, no. Not to my knowledge. Why?"
Turlough rattled the note at him. "It's in English."
The Doctor peered at his companion over his glasses. "Are you sure?"
Turlough looked annoyed. "I had to read enough of it at Brendan School." He passed the note over. "And you were right about us being brought here on purpose."
"Hmm." The Doctor read the note aloud. " 'Yo, Time Traveling Temptations--' " He glanced at his companion. "Surely that doesn't refer to us?"
"Well, one of us is certainly tempting…."
"Egotist." He returned to the note. "Let's see… 'You should have stayed right and tight in the TARDIS. But to make the return worth your while, I'll have the martini bar up and running by the time you get back. Jack.' "
"Who's Jack?"
"I haven't a clue… at the moment. I daresay we'll both know in, oh, fifteen minutes or so." He took his glasses off and tucked them back into his coat.
**
Time Lord and companion walked back though the sculptured grounds in relative silence. As they re-entered the garden hosting the TARDIS, though, the Doctor stopped suddenly, wincing and clutching at his hearts. Turlough immediately grabbed his elbow and helped him to remain standing. "Cosmic angst?"
"Worse," the Doctor gasped. "Temporal angst."
"Temporal?!"
"Yes." The painful wave passed; the Doctor brushed off Turlough's support with a gentle pat to his hand. Standing straight once again, he continued, "Something's gone a little off in my timeline."
"Someone, I should think. Jack."
"Jack be nimble, Jack be quick…"
"Jack be playing you a naughty trick?"
"Let's find out, shall we?"
Turlough shrugged agreement and followed the Doctor inside the TARDIS.
**
Jack looked up from the mixology experiment he had set up in the console room and smirked at the new arrivals. "Well, hey there, stranger!" He gave the Doctor a visual once-over that brought a faint blush to the Time Lord's cheeks. "Like the new body. Have it long?"
"Erm, long enough."
"You're cute when you're uncomfortable." Jack added the last ingredient to the shaker and mixed things up. "The usual, Doctor, or have your tastes changed along with your tongue?"
"The usual's fine, erm, Jack," The Doctor replied, trying not to look as nonplussed as he felt.
"Great." Jack poured three drinks, set them up on a tray, and skirted around the bar cart to serve. He passed a martini to the Doctor, his hand lingering on the glass a moment longer than absolutely necessary. Turning to Turlough, he offered him his hand. "Hi, I'm Jack Harkness. Captain Jack Harkness."
"Turlough." He accepted a drink, giving the Doctor a dirty look when the Time Lord shook his head slightly in discouragement.
"Right." Jack rested the tray on top of the central column and raised his glass in toast. "To old friends and new acquaintances."
"Cheers," the Doctor echoed politely.
The three clinked glasses. Jack drank deeply, Turlough sipped, and the Doctor feigned a swallow. "So… where's Rose?"
"Rose?" Turlough echoed.
"She's… not with me at the moment."
"She okay?"
"As far as I know."
"Good." Jack finished his martini. "Either of you need a refill?"
Turlough raised his mostly-empty glass; Jack nodded and brought both glasses and the tray back to the cart.
"So, Jack… why did you, erm, call?" the Doctor asked.
Jack shrugged. "Needed a lift. Missed being here. The usual. So… why'd you leave me on the station?"
"Ah…." The Doctor had no idea what to say. He knew that Jack came from his future, but also knew he'd better not say anything to alert him that something was off until he knew for sure whether the tall, dark, well-muscled man was friend or foe.
Jack took the silence to mean it wasn't something to talk about in public. "No problem. We'll discuss things later." He freshened the drinks, gave Turlough's back to him, and gave the Time Lord a disarming grin. "What's our next stop?" The Doctor and Turlough exchanged worried glances. "Not interested in resuming a threesome, huh? Well, okay, I'll survive somehow. Still, it's a drag you got stuffier when you got prettier." He slammed back his martini began packing up the bar cart. "I'll keep out of your way until we land some place. If it's okay I hitch a lift, that is."
"Of course," the Doctor said.
"Great." Jack sounded cheerful; he didn't, however, meet either set of blue eyes as he wheeled his cart out of the room.
As soon as he left, the Doctor jerked his head toward the door. "Go after him."
"Me?" Turlough balked.
"You. Get him talking, try to find out exactly when and where he's from. But don't let on he's from my future."
"All right."
"Meanwhile, I'll analyze the readouts and see whether I can place him back in the proper time stream." He passed his empty glass to Turlough.
**
Jack found himself unloading the bar cart by slamming things down instead of placing them properly. He had expected the Doctor to be at least apologetic for leaving him behind in the aftermath of the Daleks' defeat. At the very least, he had hoped that the Doctor was still his very good friend, despite the different body. But… he felt like he was intruding. And he didn't understand it.
"You forgot these," Turlough said, sauntering into the canteen with two empty glasses.
"I left in kind of a rush."
"We noticed." The ginger-haired youth held out a glass. "Refill? And help yourself, while you're at it."
Jack raised an eyebrow. "You're too kind," he said, obediently mixing up a fresh batch of martinis.
Turlough foraged for some nuts, a wedge of Wensleydale, and some crackers; he set up the snack on the battered wooden table, found napkins, plates, and a cheese cutter, and settled into a red vinyl diner chair as Jack placed a fresh drink in front of him.
The captain grabbed a chair opposite, swung it around, and saddled it. "So… what's his problem?"
"Worry, I suppose." Turlough faked a nonchalant shrug. "You know how he can get about problems in the time streams."
"Yeah, he's a real pain in the butt about it." Jack raised an eyebrow in realization. "Hey, I'm not the problem, am I?"
"It is strange to meet up with a companion from a different incarnation."
"Yeah?"
"The Time Lords frown on that sort of thing, apparently."
"Oh, sure, right." Warning bells had gone off in Jack's head. Still, maybe he should confirm before fully admitting that the Doctor he had drawn to Hestiopia came before "his" Doctor and not after.
**
The Doctor swore the beeping the TARDIS console made sounded sad. Although he had gotten some information from it, he still felt something was missing. And no matter how he rearranged and enhanced the calculations he fed the console, he still couldn't get all the projections he felt he needed. He suspected something kept him from going beyond a certain point.
Then he remembered. Turlough still had the dematerialization circuit. That had to be the source of the computations problem. He would have to go and find the boy….
**
"…and so we drove the car into a ditch, and that's when I first met the Black Guardian." Turlough eyed his empty glass. "Mynkos, I've had a little too much."
"Are you even old enough to drink?" Jack teased.
"Depends on what planet's calendar you use."
"I hear you!" Jack casually swirled the olive around his otherwise-parched glass. "Ever been to Gallifrey?"
"Once. Didn't see much of it, of course. We spent our time in the Death Zone."
"Oh, that's a drag."
"I've been in worse places."
"I don't doubt it."
Turlough lowered his gaze; Jack almost thought he was embarrassed. "You're very kind."
"I can be much more than kind."
"I'm not surprised."
Jack gazed at the ginger-haired youth for a moment. Oh, yes, he was completely loyal to his Doctor; just as he and Rose were loyal to theirs. Too bad that Jack shouldn't actually be hanging with him…. "Well, I've enjoyed this little chat, but I gotta go have words with the Doctor."
"Oh? Why?"
"You're cute when you're feigning innocence." Jack patted Turlough's hand. "Don't worry, I have some idea what's going on."
"There's nothing going on here."
"That's not what that blush says."
Turlough, who hadn't been blushing, felt the flush creep up his cheeks. "It's a little hot in here," he demurred.
"Some like it hot." Jack obliged, though, by reaching for the shaker and refilling Turlough's glass.
"I don't think this will cool me much," Turlough said, gulping the martini down.
"Good. I don't want it to." Jack studied Turlough's expression for a moment, a disappointed look crossing his handsome features. "Aw… don't play for my team, huh?"
"Erm… don't know which team I play for, if you put it that way."
"Well… let me help you decide." He leaned over and planted a firm kiss on the youth's lips.
**
The Doctor stopped short before entering the canteen. His companion and guest were clearly quite occupied and… perhaps he shouldn't interrupt. He backpedaled some 30 feet back down the corridor, pushing away the waves of… envy? jealousy?... that threatened to drown him.
He worked hard to keep the more… tender… emotions out of his life. Lives, really, because he had made sure not too get too deep with anyone since he had bolted from Gallifrey. Although he certainly found himself tempted to get closer to several companions-- Jamie, Jo, Sarah, Nyssa-- he had only ever allowed himself to merge with Romana. And that was only because, as a Time Lord, she understood.
Still, he had no idea he had ranked Turlough as high as Nyssa until he saw him kissing Jack.
He shook his head, trying to dislodge both the sight and thought. Then, sounding breathier than usual, he called, "Turlough? Jack? Where are you?"
**
Turlough felt great disappointment when Jack withdrew his lips. Jack, however, merely grinned. "Not a human, are you?"
"That obvious?"
"It's all in the taste, ya know." He raised his voice. "Hey, Doctor, in the canteen. The martinis are still flowing…."
"Ah, excellent." The Doctor entered and took a seat, vaguely focusing on the small cooktop beyond the table. "I could use another…."
"Not like you," Turlough commented.
"Everything is slightly messed-up at the moment."
Jack passed the Doctor a fresh drink. "I assume you mean me."
"Unfortunately, yes."
"How far off am I from you."
The Doctor sighed. "I am my fifth incarnation."
"Okay. I get the picture."
"And you're with…?"
"Better I don't say."
"Ah, yes, quite. Still, the faster you're dropped off somewhere, the better."
"Do you have to go?" Turlough wondered.
"Yes." Both the Doctor and Jack were emphatic in their answer.
"If you'd return the dematerialization circuit…?" the Doctor added, holding out a hand.
Turlough pulled it out of his jacket and passed it over reluctantly. The Doctor let his hand linger over Turlough's a moment longer than necessary before snatching the circuit away.
"Last call?" Jack asked, waving the shaker past the others.
"None for me, thanks, I'm driving." The Doctor placed his untouched drink down on the table and, tossing and catching the dematerialization circuit like a cricket ball, left the room.
Turlough placed his glass down as well. "Might as well return to the console room…."
"I hear you, brother." Jack placed the shaker and the glasses in the small sink.
**
The Doctor kept his eyes firmly on the time rotor as Jack and Turlough returned to the control room. "So, Doctor, where we off to?" Jack asked, gazing at the odd readout and marveling at the retroness of it all.
"Erm… Cardiff, 2006?"
"Works for me."
The time rotor shuddered to a stop. "We've arrived."
"Okay, then." Jack brushed his lips against Turlough's cheek, and did the same for the Doctor. "Be seeing you, then." He palmed the door control and strode out confidently.
The moment Jack had left, the Doctor shut the TARDIS doors and dematerialized. "So much for that."
"Our encounter with him's not going to mess up the time streams, is it?"
"I certainly hope not." The Doctor spun the coordinate controls at random and smiled as the time rotor resumed its up-and-down motion.
Turlough watched the Time Lord watch the rotor, and eventually sighed. "Earth again?" he taunted.
"Perhaps. Perhaps the Eye of Orion. I set the coordinates randomly."
"I didn't think you could do that."
"Oh, I do it all the time, I just don't like to admit it."
"Like many other things you won't admit?"
The Doctor gave his companion a stern look. "That's enough, Turlough. Let's see where we'll land next."