i just don't understand or fit in with this world and most of the time it feels like i never will.

on the other hand.
do i really want to understand or fit in with a world that can be so fucked and so beautiful at the same time?

i am losing my mind and i don't want to be sick anymore.

there is definately something missing.

things seem to be falling into place.

i just
i just
i just

can't get anything right anymore.

lately all i can think about is women.

i need to stop doing that.

i love life but sometimes i feel it way too much.

i am really not ok.

i feel like talking but there's no one around to listen.

i am sick of constantly being fucked over by choices i've made in the past, the systems i must be a part of, things that are beyond my control, etc.